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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To think it's childish when grown women ask other women what they're wearing somewhere?

147 replies

pregahes · 04/04/2024 20:24

Especially when it's days in advance it just seems...trivial.

AIBU to find it annoying?

OP posts:
NameChangedAgainn · 04/04/2024 22:43

labamba007 · 04/04/2024 22:16

I'm wearing jeans and a nice top what about you, OP?

Are you wearing heels with that? Or flats? 🤔🤣

ConfrontationDoesntHaveToBeScarey · 04/04/2024 22:41

I absolutely hate it when my friends ask me that...and I haven't pin pointed what it is about that causes that reaction.

Maybe I feel like it puts pressure on having to look good.
Maybe I don't like to appear like I've made an effort I just want to come across like I've thrown this all on at the last minute...like it's easy to look good. I'm not sure. Just thinking out loud.

Alicewinn · 04/04/2024 22:41

Only because I find it boring, I struggle with wardrobe choices but appreciate others find it exciting and joyful

NewMe2024 · 04/04/2024 22:40

labamba007 · 04/04/2024 22:16

I'm wearing jeans and a nice top what about you, OP?

😂

RosePombear · 04/04/2024 22:39

YABU.

ObliviousCoalmine · 04/04/2024 22:38

It's trivial to make a thread about it...

NewMe2024 · 04/04/2024 22:38

YABU. It’s just a bit of fun in the run up to an event.

Original poster
pregahes · 04/04/2024 22:37

Mumoftwo1312 · 04/04/2024 22:03

Omg op I think you might be my friend.

I don't go out often any more (been pregnant or breastfeeding for the last 4y plus) and been invited to a big venued birthday. Its next week.

Asked my friend what we're wearing "is it like, wedding guest or pub date, do you think?" And she replies "I'm sure you can wear whatever you want".

I feel snubbed. Won't ask her again. But relieved by the responses on this thread

Maybe I am your friend 😬😂

OP posts:
KreedKafer · 04/04/2024 22:28

pregahes · 04/04/2024 20:44

@Mnetcurious it's not a secret but I often don't give it thought until the last minute!

Well, look at you, aren’t you just so superior to other women, with your effortless lack of interest in silly feminine things. I’m sure not chatting about clothes frees up plenty of time to focus on much more important pursuits, such as telling people that you’re not like other girls and would rather hang out with the guys.

1983Louise · 04/04/2024 22:28

If asked I always say I'm wearing my gimp suit 😁

fuckssaaaaake · 04/04/2024 22:27

Lol

meganorks · 04/04/2024 22:22

YABU. And pretty miserable. I can't say I really do it very often. But if you are going to something a bit special or different to the norm, it can be reasuring/interesting to know.

I don't think it's childish. But so what if it is? Being childish every now and again is fun. Better than being an old misery.

Isittimeformynapyet · 04/04/2024 22:20

LadyOfACertainAge · 04/04/2024 20:27

YABU. If it means I’m not left feeling frumpy or standing out then i’ll ask to check I’ve got the vibe right.

If you don't buy frumpy clothes you will never look frumpy.

Clothes for all occasions are available in non-fumpy.

labamba007 · 04/04/2024 22:16

I'm wearing jeans and a nice top what about you, OP?

Mumoftwo1312 · 04/04/2024 22:14

NameChangedAgainn · 04/04/2024 22:10

I'd go wedding guest, better to be overdressed than under dressed.
Your friend sounds mean!

Show quote history

Thank you! I think I will, I don't get many opportunities to get wear a nice frock lol

NameChangedAgainn · 04/04/2024 22:10

Mumoftwo1312 · 04/04/2024 22:05

Ps but if anyone can let me know on here?! Wedding guest or pub date??? :)

I'd go wedding guest, better to be overdressed than under dressed.
Your friend sounds mean!

Mumoftwo1312 · 04/04/2024 22:05

Ps but if anyone can let me know on here?! Wedding guest or pub date??? :)

Mumoftwo1312 · 04/04/2024 22:03

Omg op I think you might be my friend.

I don't go out often any more (been pregnant or breastfeeding for the last 4y plus) and been invited to a big venued birthday. Its next week.

Asked my friend what we're wearing "is it like, wedding guest or pub date, do you think?" And she replies "I'm sure you can wear whatever you want".

I feel snubbed. Won't ask her again. But relieved by the responses on this thread

chineapplepunks · 04/04/2024 22:02

Sometimes I just ask because I'm a nosey cow.

NewName24 · 04/04/2024 22:00

YABU

Would have been interesting to see a poll as it does seem overwhelmingly people think YABU.

Even if you don't want to check yourself, how does it bother you if someone else wants to fit in ?

cheeseandketchupsandwich · 04/04/2024 21:47

YANBU to find it annoying. You're entitled to your opinion

YABVFU and very childish to create a thread to moan about it

EndlessVortex · 04/04/2024 21:46

Christ, you’d hate me!

LoobyDop · 04/04/2024 21:45

Well aren’t you just too cool for school. I enjoy thinking about what I’m going to wear for different occasions, I find it interesting, so I also enjoy discussing it with friends who share that interest and enjoyment. It’s called conversation.

Scarlettjade · 04/04/2024 21:41

pregahes · 04/04/2024 20:24

Especially when it's days in advance it just seems...trivial.

AIBU to find it annoying?

I sort of agree..

If the girls and I are going somewhere new or where we don’t go very often, I think it makes sense to ask what each other’s wearing, so no one is over / under dressed.

However, when going to the same cocktail bar in town that we go to once a month, so we know the vibe / style etc then I don’t think there’s any need to text asking what everyone is wearing then- I have a friend who usually does ask and I always reply saying I don’t know, because genuinely I decide about an hour before we go out, when I’m getting dressed.

grizzlygrump · 04/04/2024 21:38

Absolutely love chatting shit about what we’re wearing! My friends are such fabulous dressers though.