16th birthday party & alcohol

DS had a party at 16 too with just a small group of friend, we did buy a bottle of vodka and some beers but DH stayed home and checked on them regularly. Other Kids parents knew there would be alcohol and we preferred knowing what they were drinking instead of buying anything dodgy

I wouldnt risk being out of the house due to ransoms but that's already been said.

I get the whole giving them something you're happy with but there is no good choice of alcohol.

If you're going to go ahead with it, let them source their own and learn from their mistakes of drinking.

If you want to leave your child at home with an unlocked drinks cupboard, that's your parenting decision. Maybe your child wont even want to drink.

Let little isobelle get in trouble for getting drunk on alcohol she has swiped from her parents house or asked an older sibling to buy. Dont line yourself up up for the hassle of providing booze to minors.

Same here!

My parents would let me have those VK and WKD alcopops from 15, at home and at friends houses. (We also drank in parks and on fields and we all turned out okay. #CouncilEstateLife 😂)

Parents were never present when we had house parties, nothing ever got trashed.

Obviously if you’re not comfortable OP, then don’t do it. If you feel like you trust your DD and her friends then just check with their parents first.

Totally fine with the other parents approval.

My ds went to his mates 16th the mum bought drinks ds came home at 11.30 cheerful but not pissed said they all had 3 ciders each and he had a great time. Teaching them about sensible drinking is a good thing I'd rather my ds done that than go hang out in the park with his mates drinking.

I think actively providing booze could be sending a slightly bad message if something did go wrong. Tell her the rule is no spirits if kids choose to bring their own. And you're not approving so to speak. Explain it's not about her but that some people are irresponsible. If you keep spirits in the house remove them too.
A few beers is fine but if you supply them it makes it trickier I guess.

They will still bring their own so what you provide will just be more.

Have you permission from parents?

You have been told they will be drinking, are you still going out leaving them unsupervised?

What are your plans to ensure all the children you have supplied alcohol to/condoned drinking in your home get back home safely?

Given some people attending will be 15 it's a hard no from me. I would only supply alcohol to 18 year olds. They have their whole lives to drink at parties. I'd make it clear to your teen alcohol is unwelcome and anyone with any will be asked to go home.

It's a no from me if it's mixed sex and there is no adult supervising. I had my drink spiked with excess alcohol at 15 which I stupidly drunk to not embarrass myself at an event like this, and then was raped when I passed out.

But if it's girls only I'd be fine with a couple of alcopops each.

You definitely need to stay home OP, what is your kid going to do if loads of other hear about the party and try to crash it.

My DD got dangerously drunk in a situation like this when she wasn't used to drinking and a few girls were drinking together at one of their houses while the parents were out.
I wouldn't go out and leave them if there was a chance of alcohol. If you are providing alcohol the other parents should know the score .Parents often used to confiscate alcohol when my DC were young and return it ant the end of the evening.

We have literally just had our DDs 16th party. She had 20 guests and we did provide some alcohol (and domino's pizza) and plenty of soft drinks.

The thing is some kids did bring their own. I found two small bottles of empty vodka and a bottle of tequila. Also some brought beer. We weren't getting going to frisk them upon entry so had to trust them. To be fair DD did choose her guest list carefully. She had a mix of from school and out of school friends and some of the out of school are a year above.

We absolutely did not leave the house though (no way we would agree to that at all). We were in another room and we took it in turns to pop out every 20-30 mins to check in proceedings.

No, but my DD is 16 and not interested in drinking yet. I wouldn’t do it unless all parents provided permission and I’d also stay upstairs

I personally wouldn’t want to deal with the aftermath of leaving teens, unsupervised, with alcohol. I think you’ll have to deal with very concerned parents (unless they have all agreed) and possibly some vomit if some of the teens, understandably, cannot handle alcohol.

But defo sound out the other parents obviously.

I’m of the view that if they want to get hold of alcohol they will. Do you want to provide them some and they be honest with you (and you can control that amount) or for them to smuggle in and lie?

I think if you end up being too strict around this they’ll just end up not telling you and then getting drunk in a park somewhere. It’s better for it to be under your roof, where it’s safe and you can control the amount.

You can't supply alcohol to 10x 15/16 year olds without (or even with) their parents consent.

Many of them won't have had a drink before and anything could happen.

No way would I go out and leave them with alcohol. Maybe get some if you are there in the background and other parents are ok with it.

No way would I allow more than one or two friends around unsupervised with my (very sensible) 16 year old
As a previous poster has said it is likely others will turn up once they hear there’s a “party”
I would also not provide proper alcohol at that age although would consider making a slightly alcoholic punch bowl (but only with the other parents agreement and only if an adult would be there to supervise it)
Anything could go wrong

Going against the grain here but very similar sounding group of friends and situation for 16th and we did provide some white wine and lemonade so they could have spritzers. We were in the house upstairs and I made sure daughters friends parents knew and were ok with it. When left to their own devices I know friends of hers get vodka etc from older siblings so I thought this was a better bet. They were great and behaved really well and had lots of fun so no regrets here. I think open communication and trust are the key as they will find a way and that will end worse probably. I had strict rules on smoking and vaping too which dd communicated before hand.

This was the norm for me growing up at 16, but I think you’d need sign-off from the parents.

Lidl do small bottles of shandy that are very tasty and only about 0.9%

I think from 16yo I let dd have a few fruit ciders (we live in Somerset 😉) with her friends when they came over. I did check with the parents first and they were all fine with it.

10 friends is quite a lot though....

At 16 I would have 100% snuck alcohol in but not had it provided for me. I wouldn't be shocked if they had a few but I wouldn't facilitate and give permission.