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AIBU?

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Original poster

no good c**t

42 replies

Faiiry · 02/04/2024 00:15

That's what my bf kept saying over and over until i kicked him out tonight ( obviously about me )

Now he did have few beers and i was questioning our relationship.
He is often smelly so i point out lack of hygiene . So we haven't had sex for a while .

Anyways i feel very insulted, would you end relationship after being called " no good c'nt "

eww and TIA

OP posts:
New posts on this thread. Refresh page
pointythings · 05/04/2024 15:43

Look up DARVO so that you know you were right. You deserve better than this, and you clearly have good boundaries given how decisive you've been. Your anger is righteous, let it protect you from letting him get to you.

TheBottomsOfMyTrousersAreRolled · 05/04/2024 15:39

alwaysmovingforwards · 02/04/2024 10:19

I stopped reading at smelly before even getting to the insults...
OP, why is your bar for what's acceptable so low?
Is this genuinely the best you can get?

This. Well done on calling time on him. I would absolutely never date a smoker. They absolutely stink.

KreedKafer · 02/04/2024 11:18

he is a kind funny guy

No he isn't!

Nobody who is truly kind and funny a) can't be arsed to look after their hygiene even though it's bad to the point of putting their partner off sex and b) calls their partner a 'no good cunt'.

Please, please do not let this vile man back into your life.

Newestname002 · 02/04/2024 11:01

Faiiry · 02/04/2024 10:41

Now he is saying it's all my fault cause i was rude to him. And lecturing me on how to have "respectful conversations " and be nice to him .

Ah yes , a man who feels free to call me a "horrible cunt " is gna give me a lecture on how to be respectable!

Told him he is a free man and can find someone else to lecture on how to address his odour issues as i'm no longer interested and am
breaking up with him for the benefit of the rest of women of the world .

i'm so angry , im shaking with anger . I was expecting apology. not gaslighting.

Told him he is a free man and can find someone else to lecture on how to address his odour issues as i'm no longer interested and am breaking up with him for the benefit of the rest of women of the world.

Well done. You can SO do better! As can most women actually. 🌹

Couldyounot · 02/04/2024 10:49

Told him he is a free man and can find someone else to lecture on how to address his odour issues as i'm no longer interested and am
breaking up with him for the benefit of the rest of women of the world .

Nicely done, OP, and he can go and stink out somewhere else. Don't let him back though. He's not a kind, funny guy, he's someone who thinks it's OK to call his partner a no good cunt.

ThreePointOneFourOneFiveNine · 02/04/2024 10:46

Well that's good that he's made it so clear you've made the right decision. If he'd come back all apologetic you might feel you should give him another chance. You're well rid of him. Well done!

Original poster
Faiiry · 02/04/2024 10:41

Now he is saying it's all my fault cause i was rude to him. And lecturing me on how to have "respectful conversations " and be nice to him .

Ah yes , a man who feels free to call me a "horrible cunt " is gna give me a lecture on how to be respectable!

Told him he is a free man and can find someone else to lecture on how to address his odour issues as i'm no longer interested and am
breaking up with him for the benefit of the rest of women of the world .

i'm so angry , im shaking with anger . I was expecting apology. not gaslighting.

OP posts:
JillyTheJinx · 02/04/2024 10:37

Faiiry · 02/04/2024 00:15

That's what my bf kept saying over and over until i kicked him out tonight ( obviously about me )

Now he did have few beers and i was questioning our relationship.
He is often smelly so i point out lack of hygiene . So we haven't had sex for a while .

Anyways i feel very insulted, would you end relationship after being called " no good c'nt "

eww and TIA

Cunts are useful😁

alwaysmovingforwards · 02/04/2024 10:19

I stopped reading at smelly before even getting to the insults...
OP, why is your bar for what's acceptable so low?
Is this genuinely the best you can get?

Newestname002 · 02/04/2024 10:08

@Faiiry

he is a kind funny guy

Is he though?

A kind funny guy would, at the very least, take you into his consideration and ensure he's not habitually physically unwashed or otherwise unhygienic around you. That's hardly attractive in anyone let alone a life partner.

He would certainly not call you hurtful or disgusting names, whether he's drunk or not. Where does the need to hurt you come from?

It's good that he's not currently in your space and you don't have to walk on eggshells around him. I would not take him back into your home for some time if, actually, at all because, frankly, I'd be wondering when he'd revert to who and what he's been up to now.

I could not see myself sharing any part of my life with someone who, at any time, could behave like this to me. As you say, letting him back may lead him to think at some point you'll accept that behaviour again. And, encourage him to escalate. Why would you? 🌹

Coconutter24 · 02/04/2024 07:56

Faiiry · 02/04/2024 00:45

no definitely not. Thank you for laying it out this way .

It's just i never was called " no good cunt "
so me thinks he kinda shot himself there as there is no coming back .

yuck 🤢

Show quote history

Are you joking?!?! You would take him back even though his person hygiene is so bad, so bad you don’t regularly have sex because of it but because he called you a no good cunt that’s where you draw the line?
Obviously he is out of line for calling you that drunk or not but come on why are you with someone who doesn’t care about his personal hygiene

ChrisPriss · 02/04/2024 07:43

I think your thread title sounds like a good description of your bf

WaltzingWaters · 02/04/2024 07:31

No. Absolutely do not be with someone who calls you a no good cunt. And do not be with someone who lacks basic hygiene.

AgnesX · 02/04/2024 07:28

You booted him out? Don't allow him to come back.

PonyPatter44 · 02/04/2024 07:28

He is an abuser, though! He has just become one by abusing you. That's what an abuser is.

AhBiscuits · 02/04/2024 07:27

Yes. I would also kick him out for being smelly. Washing and wearing clean clothes is a non-negotiable.

Original poster
Faiiry · 02/04/2024 07:22

thanks everyone who replied.
It's just that he smokes and I kept reminding him to brush his teeth/ use mouth wash and refresh himself. And wash his hands before he touches food etc which makes me a horrible cunt apparently.

He really is not an abuser -i made this thread as this is first time he called me this and im not sure whether i can get over this.

Also if you forgive things like that normally it sends a message that your bar is low and are available for future abuse i think

OP posts:
hangingonfordearlife1 · 02/04/2024 07:22

id end it just for him being smelly

saoirse31 · 02/04/2024 06:45

Good for you op,you deserve way better than an abusive smelly man.

haveyoutriedturningitoffandonagain · 02/04/2024 06:10

stillplentyofjunkinthetrunk · 02/04/2024 00:32

I think it's a fairly good rule of thumb in situations like this to compare the behaviour to a random new flatmate. If a random new flatmate was treating you like this would you wish to continue to live with them - it would seem to me that the answer is a pretty clear no. And then ask yourself should a person you're in a relationship with be treating you better or worse than the level of basic courtesy you would expect from a random new flatshare?

This is good

hattie43 · 02/04/2024 06:07

Do you really need to ask . Why do some women set the bar so low

cerisepanther73 · 02/04/2024 05:42

@Faiiry

Your boyfriend is a mean joke of one

I think 🤔 you should ditch him as soon as possibility

As i think he a abusive skanky Cunt of a man .!!!!

You can do so much better too..

MariaVT65 · 02/04/2024 02:40

I don’t understand why you’ve been with him this long. I could never stand being with someone who didn’t care about personal hygiene.

Don’t let him back in. PLEASE. It’s not acceptable to call someone a no good cunt even when they are drunk.

101Nutella · 02/04/2024 02:28

YANBU.
also he should want to wash for himself. You can’t have a future with someone who needs to be told to wash their genitals! I could bet they won’t be a good life partner. Don’t be his parent. Get rid.

Screamingabdabz · 02/04/2024 02:21

Why were you even with such a disgusting man? Well done for throwing him out but don’t have doubts now. He’s smelly and abusive and you deserve sooo much better.