Breastfeeding 3.5 yo

I wouldn't want to to it when there's a chance to they could remember it.

Whether you or DD make the first move it will still be natural. You are together in this and it has to work for you both. If you start moving things along and she meets you where you are at I think that has to be the definition of natural! It doesn’t all have to come from the child.

I am naturally weaning too. Limiting feeds to just after waking up and before bed from about 3 made a big difference. I never had to say no, just ‘later before bed’. She naturally fed less and less as she became distracted with toddler life. She's 3.5 now and we go days between her asking now and as a result, my supply has dwindled so she doesn't get much when she does feed, so the feeds are very short and I think we’re down to our last feeds now.

Settling some gentle boundaries would be my recommendation. It's not saying ‘no’ just deferring to later at a agreed time. I'd say things like ‘wait for before bed, but i’d love a cuddle’ as a way of still having some comforting contact.

For me, it felt completely comfortable and natural up until the age of 2.
Then almost immediately it did not anymore.

I think I limited it to last thing at night for a very short while, then it was on to "Big Boy/Big Girl" milk from a toddler cup. 😉

My ds weaned by himself at around 3.5, and it happened very suddenly. I had bought some chocolate milkshake and he asked if he could try some of it - I gave him a small cup at bedtime. He was so distracted by it that he didn’t ask to breastfeed, and he asked for it again the next night. By the time the carton had run out he seemed to have completely forgot that he ever breastfed! He has had normal milk in a cup since then. Maybe not the best way to wean but it was painless for us both, maybe you could try distracting your little one with something else in place of breast milk for a while?

I fed till about 4 1/4 yrs. I instigated the stop and the winding down to the stop, which probably started a couple of years or more beforehand. As per the PP above I had limits. I, for example, stopped doing all bedtimes, and went out some evenings so there wasn’t always milk at the onset of sleep. Sometime later I stopped feeding at all in the night, but we did have a morning feed in bed. As he got older I didn’t feed out and about as free, only in an emergency. I would distract with other things where possible. I think he would have kept going for several more years if I had let him.

I regretted giving up when I did, in some ways, as it was such a good tool for emotional regulation and sensory regulation and I have a child who has issues in these areas due to disability. There was a marked drop in his ability to cope with the world when we stopped, but I couldn’t do it anymore.

My daughter stopped at two, I had been back at work working shifts, and so would often miss whole days, being out at 630 before she woke and not getting in until 9/930 after she’d gone to bed. I think that shoved things along a bit. Well done and good luck 💜

We also talked a lot about 'this is your milk, but mummy's boobies', and how to make tasty milk, mummy needed to rest in between times (that's what finally ended night feeds for my youngest). Good luck, extended breastfeeding isn't for everyone, but if both you and your nursling want to continue, then I wish you all the best. I think that helping them learn that I am a person too, and that good manners lead to happy milk times, has supported them to understand consent as they have grown up.

Mine stopped at 3.5 but she had a tummy bug at the time and wasn’t bothered. Then she kept saying it had made her sick so was completely off afterwards!! Happened very quickly.

I breastfed both DD1 and DD2 until 3.
I am currently still feeding my 19 month old.

In my experience my girls both needed a little nudge to stop. I stopped both of them on their 3rd birthdays. With a few little reminders before hand that when they were 3 they were big girls and didn't need it any more. I found it being their birthday was a good distraction and out of routine enough to break it.
No fuss and no tears at all... it was time for everyone.

Good luck! I have heard of magic babies that self weaned but in my experience, that was not looking likely!

I breastfed both of mine until around 5. However from about 2, I started putting limits in place. Are you approaching it in a similar way?
For example, we had set 'milk places', such as in their rooms, or the sofa, but not the armchairs or the kitchen. In the house only, but not out and about. And latterly, at bedtime, but before teeth and sleeping, then not again till morning.

She may ,she may not for years. If you dont feel up to it any more, just stop.