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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

To ask how to be a manager?

30 replies

Newmanagerpanic · 01/04/2024 11:25

I’m about to become a manager of a team of two, so there will be three of us. I’m the subject matter expert within the business, have always handled this particular area by myself. My ‘Head of’ just quit, has already gone and I’ve transitioned to someone who professionally and personally love (she’s a fantastic human being) but she has suddenly found herself the manager of a team of 5, she’s also used to being a lone wolf.

I’ve recruited one individual internally, we were friendly before and now I’m her manager. We’re a similar age. I’m currently recruiting externally and I could find myself with someone ten years younger or ten years older etc.

I have never managed someone ever. I manage projects cross-department, but I’m usually the person who people will ask “can we do this”.

Can anyone point me to some resources, books, ways of working or whatever. I already know that I will be a flexible manager - my first recruit has autism and dyslexia, we’ve had a discussion on what she needs to be able to work well. For example she needs time to digest information, we’ve signed her up to a service where she can get it to read stuff (like the 30 page documents she needs to get to grips with). If she wants to start a bit later, that’s fine - I want the results not necessarily the hours etc.

BUT how do I actually manage someone. I am disorganised, I need to make sure my team know what they’re doing each week. How do you make that happen? What tools do you use? Do people use things like Asana? Microsoft Planner?
I am panicking that I will let them down.

OP posts:
MojoMoon · 01/04/2024 11:48

Think about a time you felt you had a good manager and a time when you didn't - what was it that differed?

There are different roles within management
Project management - eg planning and overseeing a project, allocating work, staying in timetable/budget. You could use things like Asana to help if you want. Depends on how you and your team work.

People management - eg reviews, structured feedback, areas for development, assessing for promotion. This sounds like the area you are most new to?

Strategic management - eg what areas should your team be working on, new product ideas/new areas or markets or technology to adopt/move into, setting budgets eg

Your role may involve all of those parts or just some of them.

Which parts do you think the role involves the most?

Original poster
Newmanagerpanic · 01/04/2024 11:47

Eeepsh · 01/04/2024 11:40

The most important lesson I learnt was tou can't be a manager and a friend. You can be friendly of course, but not a friend.

Well I suppose this might the difficulty with my first recruit, I’m not her friend on a deeper level as I’ve only known her a short while but we do interact like friends or colleagues rather than line manager and employee

OP posts:
Original poster
Newmanagerpanic · 01/04/2024 11:46

@FlabMonsterIsDietingAgain

I like to be left alone! But that might be because the previous ‘Head of’ would spend 45 minutes quizzing when it could have been a 5 minute conversation. At first it was fine, but after two years I wondered why he didn’t understand yet. It’s not a particularly difficult area of law I work in but perhaps you just need to have the right sort of skillset/brain to grasp it.

I’m also struggling with the KPI aspect as I’ve always managed my own end of year reviews - deadly serious, I write my KPIs I decide if I’ve met them and then the ‘head of’ reviews it (not understanding what on earth I’m on about) and submits it….

I want my team to enjoy their job, feel like they have autonomy, own certain responsibilities and facilitate career development.

I’ll have a look at OneNote, I’ve sort of dabbled but not really looked in to it properly. Do you have to manage due dates etc? How would you make sure you knew when something was due - just outlook calendar or something like planner/project

OP posts:
Eeepsh · 01/04/2024 11:40

The most important lesson I learnt was tou can't be a manager and a friend. You can be friendly of course, but not a friend.

FlabMonsterIsDietingAgain · 01/04/2024 11:38

Ok, what do you like in a manager yourself?

Sit and calmly think through what the objectives/goals/KPI are for each role and how they can be measured.

In terms of tools, use what you're comfortable using, don't try to overcomplicate it. I use MS office suite at work so have a OneNote for each person I manage with a simple table on it with the date in one column and notes of our 1:1s in the next column. I highlight actions in yellow and have shared the book for each person with them so we can both refer back to the notes and actions.

People like different management styles so ask them how they like to be communicated with and how frequently. Check in on their objectives regularly to make sure they are achieving, and check in on quality of work too. As you identify gaps, address them immediately so everyone knows how they are doing and has the opportunity to improve.