How to appear rich?

I can assure you that the richest man I recently spent a week around (between London, Cape Town and Franschoek, for a wedding) was wearing unbranded shorts and T-shirts. He has no interest in his appearance, and he doesn’t need to. Crammed into an ill-fitting suit for the wedding ceremony (he was father of the bride), the rest of the time wearing a look you could buy in a supermarket. He’s the one in the boardroom in baggy shorts, whose power you recognise, not just because he’s a ruthless operator, but because he’s the one who doesn’t have to try. He’s on top of the triangle, with the people in designer gear courting him. It’s dressing like a slob as a power display.

(He lived in London for nearly 20 years before getting on the Tube. My DH took him on the Piccadilly Line and claimed he was like Arthur Weasley when he and Harry go to the Ministry of Magic on the underground.😀)

Most of the rich men I know wear fucking awful clothes and not because they’re ‘scruffy’ or old. They’re smart, clean and new, just dreadful looking.

@BronzeAge yeah uniform like rich guys. But even mark Zuckerberg always use tshirt. But its brunello cucinelli. I dont think that type of rich guys buying their tshirt from H&M. Trust me rich people like their quality. Even if they dint like flashing but you can tell cheap tshirt vs designer ones.

God don't ask that in here! You'll be told to wear shabby clothes, wellies and turn up in an old, Labrador infested estate car.

Just wear what you normally wear for a night out. Don't try and be something you're not and don't want to be. Be proud of what you have achieved.

Define rich.

you dont love your life

Thanks.

I didn't know the film reference, but do know the 3M history well - I do consulting work for them and it's one of the sections on a timeline display they have at one of the offices I visit in the US, which is what piqued my interest.

My family was well off when I grew up and it was a point of contention that my dad wouldn’t change his clothes if we were going anywhere nice. All his clothes came from cheap shops and usually had food down it, literally exactly like the stereotype 😭

Gosh..I'm rich..( no bragging was a huge compensation pay out).. but to look at me l don't appear rich.. yes l like to dress good and have my hair done.. and no money worries. But true friends won't be bothered one way or another.

Its from the film Romy & Michelles high school reunion, the one pretending to be rich says she invented Post Its.

In the US the story of the invention of Post Its is very well known (chemist at 3M tasked with formulating a strong glue messed up and made a very low tack glue, he took a pot home and his wife started using it to stick notes to the fridge) so it would be a ridiculous lie.

@PropertyManager

or just say you invented Post-Its

You're about the 20th to say that on this thread.

Will someone explain what it's about?

I think the “really rich people are scruffy” advice is misguided. That is only for the seriously, generationally wealthy. You can’t fake that, because unless you’re born into it you don’t know the subtle mannerisms, ways of talking, way of life etc. I don’t think OP is trying to convince a bunch of aristocrats that she’s landed gentry, she just wants to come across like she’s made a success of herself.

It won't work op, just be yourself.

Weirdly, people often assume dp is very posh /rich but he isn't in the slightest. I have no idea why. He comes from a very working class background and works in a very average job. It must be some kind of 'quality' that he has

Depends how good a lier she is, that’s what this would come down to.

a 3 yo car and 3 bed house is all good op. Some of them will be looking at you and wishing they had that. Don't fake it just go and have fun x

Well, I think you’re circulating with a particular type of rich person. I can think of several I know whose wealth is marked sartorially mostly by them being able to look unbelievably under-dressed and scruffy 98% of the time, purely because they own chunks of SA. One I’ve known for a quarter of a century and literally the only times I’ve seen him out of anonymous flip flops/trainers, shorts and T-shirts was at the weddings of his children. He never wears a watch. (I don’t think many people wear them any more — unnecessary wrist clutter.)

He’s far from the only one I know who regards extreme wealth as giving him the power not to have to obey grooming norms. I can think of others I’ve seen bribe front of house to get them past restaurant dress codes. More men than women, but I can think of several women who just wear ‘uniforms’, like a black shirt and trousers, all the time.

@StarlightLime not in my circle though. If they said they dont care about watches or bags but i bet they still have it. My business partner is very rich women who doesn’t into bags so much. But her shoes and watches always on point. I never meet any rich people who dont own good watches.

A friend of mine is the boss of his family business, its a big, very big beverage concern and he is worth hundreds of millions, if not over a billion.

He lives in a lovely house, but you wouldn't guess from meeting him and his family in the street, drives an old Land Rover, and none of them wear high fashion clothes - and critically they never mention business / money, they are always interested in how you are.

so that's my experience of the very rich, no side, no flash

or just say you invented Post-Its

And some successful people don't particularly care about bags and watches 🤷🏻‍♀️

I've got a 3 bed semi and a car that's nearly 20 years old.

I have a lot of generational wealth, which I'm very lucky to have.

Wealth and outwards displays of it don't necessarily tally OP.

You are content with your life ....leave it there, no need to impress anyone.

Go along to the event, make good memories. DONE .... Move on to the next day.

....but........but.......but....... you are ALREADY rich!

You love your life, you're proud of what you have achieved as a family - that's being rich .

Having loads of money and swanky clothes etc etc doesn't make a person. You being you is worth more than any material item.

If you try and fake it, you're going to feel out of your depth anyway. It's best you just being you, truly.

He's made that part of his brand though. It's marketing. It's not got to do with wealth. He's made himself a logo iyswim?

Yeah, she’s going to have a blast at her reunion if she’s not only concerned with a haircut and buying expensive shoes, but is now taking acting classes in advance to appear confident, putting in weeks of reading the FT, and conducting a sociological survey on whether the rich are happy on the night…

OP, has it occurred to you simply not to go, if the mere prospect is filling you with such shame about a life you say you’re happy with?

Go French...classy, casual