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AIBU?

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Original poster

To have asked him to choose a different sandwich

684 replies

Medsy · 30/03/2024 13:04

Don't know if it's because it's Easter or what but my local co-ops sandwich section was totally barren, only meat sandwiches left (I'm vegetarian). I saw a man go for the last cheese one there was, so I asked him if he was vegetarian and if not, would he mind if I had it? A woman (wife?) appeared and went batshit at me and called me rude.
It made me quite pissed off actually. I wouldn't have a problem with say a gluten free person asking me if they could have the last gluten free sandwich.
WIBU?

OP posts:
PhilosophicalCheeseSandwich · 30/03/2024 17:17

ChildrenOfTheQuorn · 30/03/2024 17:04

I'm a vegetarian and I wish I had your balls. I'd probably be quietly fuming. You gave him a choice, which is more than his wife did.

I said Roy will have the cheese butty. What did I say, Roy?
You said don't let the bossy vegetarian have the cheese butty.

Presumably the bloke likes cheese as much as any other omnivore, he doesn't have to want meat for every meal. That's the benefit of not being vegetarian. I say this as a vegetarian. I don't think carefully about whether I should leave the last hummus and carrot sticks in Boots in case a vegan wants it when I could have the Higgidy cheese roll instead.

AmethystSparkles · 30/03/2024 17:14

If the man had been my autistic DS, he’d probably only have eaten the cheese sandwich but he’d have felt obliged to give it to you because he’s very polite. So I’d have been cross with you too.

SherbetDips · 30/03/2024 17:14

Omfg 😂 the audacity. You cannot do that!! He’s allowed to buy what he likes vegetation or not.

FarmGirl78 · 30/03/2024 17:13

Unreasonable comparison.

Coeliacs don't have a choice in their dietary needs. Vegetarians and vegans do.

AcrossthePond55 · 30/03/2024 17:12

I'm Coeliac and if I saw someone picking up the last GF 'anything' including a sammie, I'd assume they were too. It would never even occur to me to ask them why they were buying it, nor to say "I'm Coeliac, do you mind if I have that?".

Trust me, there are plenty of times I've seen someone take the last loaf of GF bread, frozen entree, or pre made item or load their cart with the last 3, 50, or 100 of whatever it is on the shelves. I just sigh (quietly), make a small moue (being sure they can't see me) and move on.

LiquoriceAllsorts2 · 30/03/2024 17:11

You were very rude. He can choose what he wants to buy and got their first.

Headstarttohappiness · 30/03/2024 17:10

RoomOfRequirement · 30/03/2024 13:17

This is the most hilarious, sanctimonious crap I've read on here.

Today, anyway.

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Totally.
I despair at the self centred entitlement that seems to be increasingly normalised today.

KeinLiebeslied54321 · 30/03/2024 17:08

ChildrenOfTheQuorn · 30/03/2024 17:04

I'm a vegetarian and I wish I had your balls. I'd probably be quietly fuming. You gave him a choice, which is more than his wife did.

What now?

chocolategg · 30/03/2024 17:07

Medsy · 30/03/2024 16:52

Well clearly I live on another planet (duly accepted!) because I actually feel the complete opposite to you. I find it concerning and sad to live in a society where someone can't politely, in a friendly way and applying no pressure, ask if there's any chance someone would be okay with swapping sandwiches. It's hardly "Hey do you mind if I take a dump un your basket?" is it?
He could have said "actually I'm veggie too" or "actually I've been really craving a cheese sandwich, sorry!" and I would have said no problem! Or he might have said "sure, I was torn between that and the chicken coronation anyway so knock yourself out".

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He could be completely thrown by your question and stand there mutely

chocolategg · 30/03/2024 17:06

Exactly my point. Someone's going to eat the meat so it might as well be op

Hankunamatata · 30/03/2024 17:05

Yeah you were rude. You were rude asking if he was vegetarian.

ChildrenOfTheQuorn · 30/03/2024 17:04

I'm a vegetarian and I wish I had your balls. I'd probably be quietly fuming. You gave him a choice, which is more than his wife did.

KeinLiebeslied54321 · 30/03/2024 17:04

Flivequacle · 30/03/2024 17:00

It's not rude to ask if he wouldbe prepared to let you have it. He can say yes or no. It is rude to lead with a gatekeeping question that implies you are more worthy of it.

Not a big deal either way, though. The replies on this thread are OTT. Some people must live extraordinarily sheltered lives if a non-threatening encounter with a stranger asking for a favour is considered rude.

Edited

We have no idea about other people's lives or circumstances though.

Megifer · 30/03/2024 17:04

Medsy · 30/03/2024 13:04

Don't know if it's because it's Easter or what but my local co-ops sandwich section was totally barren, only meat sandwiches left (I'm vegetarian). I saw a man go for the last cheese one there was, so I asked him if he was vegetarian and if not, would he mind if I had it? A woman (wife?) appeared and went batshit at me and called me rude.
It made me quite pissed off actually. I wouldn't have a problem with say a gluten free person asking me if they could have the last gluten free sandwich.
WIBU?

I really hope this is true 🤣🤣🤣🤣

Actually asking if he's a vegetarian, brilliant.

Flivequacle · 30/03/2024 17:00

It's not rude to ask if he wouldbe prepared to let you have it. He can say yes or no. It is rude to lead with a gatekeeping question that implies you are more worthy of it.

Not a big deal either way, though. The replies on this thread are OTT. Some people must live extraordinarily sheltered lives if a non-threatening encounter with a stranger asking for a favour is considered rude.

Jewnicorn · 30/03/2024 16:55

I wouldn’t have found it rude in the slightest if someone asked me that. Depending on what was available I might have said no but assuming they weren’t going to get annoyed with my response it doesn’t hurt to ask.
I don’t think I’d have done the asking though, I’d have just silently cursed myself for not getting there a minute earlier.

KeinLiebeslied54321 · 30/03/2024 16:52

YABVU.
Even 'asking' is putting pressure on someone.

Original poster
Medsy · 30/03/2024 16:52

EllBellWell · 30/03/2024 16:45

What is concerning is that you felt asking him was an option? Wtf is wrong with society. I am vegetarian and would not dream of doing this. Entitled much to even consider it

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Well clearly I live on another planet (duly accepted!) because I actually feel the complete opposite to you. I find it concerning and sad to live in a society where someone can't politely, in a friendly way and applying no pressure, ask if there's any chance someone would be okay with swapping sandwiches. It's hardly "Hey do you mind if I take a dump un your basket?" is it?
He could have said "actually I'm veggie too" or "actually I've been really craving a cheese sandwich, sorry!" and I would have said no problem! Or he might have said "sure, I was torn between that and the chicken coronation anyway so knock yourself out".

OP posts:
NeedToChangeName · 30/03/2024 16:51

I think you were cheeky to ask, as you were probably relying on him being too polite to say No

You could have survived on crisps, biscuits and fruit, or a veg pasty, or sushi

EllBellWell · 30/03/2024 16:45

Medsy · 30/03/2024 13:13

Fair enough, it was only a question!

What is concerning is that you felt asking him was an option? Wtf is wrong with society. I am vegetarian and would not dream of doing this. Entitled much to even consider it

Everythinggreen · 30/03/2024 16:44

rollonretirementfgs · 30/03/2024 15:34

Poor you! Don't be vegan then.

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Ooh outing yourself are you 😂

WiddlinDiddlin · 30/03/2024 16:44

I dunno whats more annoying, you asking, or all the people trying to look clever by pointing out that cheese might not be vegetarian.

Very few places now use non-vegetarian cheeses in pre-prepared products like sandwiches, you'd have to actively seek them out. There isn't going to be the big drama you are hoping for when you cause a vegetarian to realise they've inadvertently been eating cheese with calves rennet in it!

Ithinkofyouallofthetime · 30/03/2024 16:37

Medsy · 30/03/2024 13:36

I asked really politely if there was any chance he would change his mind and he seemed to be hesitating when the woman came from behind me and said "excuse me? That is so rude!". I just ignored her and said thanks anyway and good luck to the guy.
If someone was gluten free or could only eat halal or kosher and asked me the way I did, I'd just think sure. Don't see the problem but clearly I'm in the minority.

Why did you say good luck to him? Was that suppose to be a dig at his wife?

JJathome · 30/03/2024 16:29

Can’t believe you gave a proper passive aggressive good luck as your parting shot.

so entitled. What does it matter if he’s veggie or not, he’s entitled to buy and eat as he pleases, the cheese sarnies aren’t only for vegetarians. I’d not have abused you though, , I’d just have taken it off my husband said I’ll have it darling, laughed and walked away from you. Your petty good luck would have had me proper chuckling though.

diddl · 30/03/2024 16:20

Well I guess it's OK to ask but chances are he chose the sandwich because he wanted cheese/didn't fancy the meat ones!