Toddler cinema club - AIBU

It sounds like you were at the cinema.

I think you have quite different expectations of this than a lot of parents. If something is marketed as "toddler", to me that suggests developmentally appropriate behaviour for toddlers is going to be welcome, including one year olds.

Same.

I would assume anything with "toddler" in the title was going to be fairly wild, with one and two year olds wandering around.

I think the issue is, you have brought one kid towards the top end of the toddler age range, and another kid who is out of that age range and could probably cope at a normal cinema, and that has shaped your expectations. So for 3 and 5 year olds, yes it's a perfect "gateway" to going to the cinema to see a kids' film. But parents of younger kids won't be thinking like that.

I took my 3 year old to see a children's film recently and I was also shocked by the behaviour. Adults unable to sit still for 1 hour. Constantly jumping up for the toilet / snacks etc.
It's probably just another example of me me me society where everyone does exactly what they want when they want and to hell with anyone else.

YANBU.

I thought it was just a different type of activity desperate parents could use to entertain their kids when they are sick of soft play. Not a whole heap of options in this endless rain

That's the point of baby cinema, yes.

But baby cinema and toddler cinema aren't the same thing.

Baby cinema is for the adults, so mums can feed & look after their babies while watching a film, and maybe meet some other mums in the cinema cafe too.

Babies have to be under 1, and they're not counted as watching the film so adult certificate films can be shown.

At least that's how it worked at my local one. Strictly no toddlers as then the films would have to be suitable for DC.

So toddler cinema is different, as the films need to be age appropriate.

I managed cinemas in my early 20s and those screenings are sort of seen as a safe space where children can watch a film, or their parents can access a film (parent and baby screenings especially) where they won't disturb other patrons by their short attention spans and they can get up and move about. It's an acknowledgment that they cannot sit for a 90 min presentation so are given their own screening, usually with the film at a lower volume and lights in the screen a touch brighter too, to experience a cinema screen and film but without the expectation of being still and silent. That comes with age and attention span.

Don't get me started however on cinema etiquette across the board though, I've not worked in one for over a decade and it was getting bad then so can't imagine what it's like now. Littering, talking, and looking at bright phone screens. Makes me furious even now.

Gentle parenting is a technique that involves managing a child's behaviour effectively without resorting to anger/frightening/threatening/hitting .

It should result in the child altering their behaviour due to understanding they need to (on some level) rather than altering their behaviour due to fear /humiliation

It's an opportunity to take younger children to the cinema (or Sen children) who would be disruptive in a regular performance

I'd expect noise and movement

Last time we went, a mum made her daughter stand on the steps in pitch black in front of the screen and took multiple photos with the flash.

She told another dad to fuck off when asked if she could stop. People are feral and entitled.

That would be a With with Baby screening where you can take your a child under the age of 1 to watch normal films.

A Toddler Time screening is usually 30 minutes of a short children’s animation. I go sometimes and don’t care about children running around/climbing on stage/talking. It’s just something nice to do in the day. Tickets are cheap and parents don’t pay for entry so you can’t expect it to be like a normal showing

We don’t go to toddler cinema because my daughter wouldn’t get anything out of it yet, but the clue is in the name. If you want a showing where everyone sits quietly then go to a regular showing. The age range is 1-5 but that’s to accommodate families. It’s really aimed at toddlers not preschoolers or school children.

I've never been to these showings but I thought the point was so that if your baby cries or your toddler needs to go to the toilet six times, you don't need to stress. I didn't think the point was so your kids can run riot. But like PP, this seems to be genera behaviour nowadays anyway. It's annoying going anywhere tbh.

They don't tend to be adult films, it's not for the benefit of the parents that can't get babysitters. It's kids films, for small children.
I always feel sympathy for struggling parents who are out and about but this is treating a cinema like a play park or soft play centre and ruins the experience of other paying customers.
Doesn't do the children any favours either, growing up thinking that behaviour is appropriate.

I agree with you OP.
I'd expect the lights a little higher, the volume of the film to be a little lower and expect more chitty chat from the littluns. More questions to mummy, more toilet breaks etc but I'd expect the general behaviour to be the same as normal.
I'd be judging these parents a little bit too for having no boundaries and rules for their children when out in public 🤷🏼‍♀️

That’s not gentle parenting. That’s just not parenting. Gentle parenting means doing it in a way so the the kid understands and learns indeed of just being scared eg hitting and screaming at them.

I think it depends, most of the ones I’ve been to haven’t been like this. Sen and relaxed performances are though.

I thought the idea of baby and toddler cinema was so that the parent gets a chance to see the film /cinema experience that otherwise they wouldn’t be able to? So for people who don’t have a babysitter for the adult to go to the cinema, they can go with the kid and other people aren’t judging the kid for running around and making noise because everyone is in the same position

"I don’t really understand the need for adults to talk to their children at full volume either “we have that dinosaur at home!” “Oh look, a tree!”

There is no need, they're just entitled show offs who think people are impressed by their performance parenting. Embarrassed for them.