Dss doesn’t want to take part in Easter egg hunt

Turn off the wi-fi.😆
I'm not sure if some posters are on a wind-up.
Seems like the archetypal evil stepmum is real.

There is no way my DD aged 11 would want to join in and I'd be happy for her to read a book in her room- as long as she has said hello to all the guests. Its an awkward age OP. I think you need to be careful about the weight comments.

Way to encourage reading as a pleasure, do you really make your children read as a punishment?

It doesn't sound like he's even asked for candy from the hunt? And he probably won't because he already has plenty, seems like a non issue although of course it would be ideal for him to be socialising. Eleven can be a difficult age, just give him some space.

I don't disagree with you re. games in general.

I disagree that him declining to do an Easter Egg hunt should be the impetus for removing his games though. If the OP genuinely believes he has a problem then of course they should look at limiting his screen time etc. But we both know that that's completely different to going 'fine, don't come to the egg hunt but I'm turning the wi-fi off'.

Punishing non-attendance at an Easter party is in no way the same as being generally mindful of limiting screen time.

What’s the little dig about him being overweight all about?

You are displaying a complete lack of empathy. You just assume that he is being difficult on purpose.

But you should have considered:

• that he might be self-conscious about his weight and knows that he is not the fittest kid so does not want to be seen running around chasing eggs by a bunch of other people
• that in general in might not be feeling great about himself and might be going through tough times (kids will often get bullied at schools for being overweight) and that is why he is comfort-eating and not doing much socialising
• he is simply too old to be interested in an Easter egg hunt and might be more of introvert, and there is nothing wrong with that.

Frankly, I would simply tell him that the choice is his and that he is welcome to join if he wants to but that you will respect his choice either way.

Then have a chat with his mother about your concerns with his weight and the fact that he is withdrawn.

The people who are suggesting he is punished for this: you are a bloody disgrace.

If he doesn't want to take part that is fine but would i hell let him sit in his room gaming and ignoring the guests in your home. Allow it today and it will become the norm. No wonder too many children and young adults can't socialise.

Wow your fun. He’s 11 and a boy highly likely isn’t into Easter now. Let him do what he wants with the agreement he at least comes down and says hello for 20 mins. You sound mean saying he’s overweight. Why wouldn’t you just save him back a few eggs for him to have whilst he’s gaming? Few eggs today isn’t going to sort out his weight today that’s for his parents.

Both these examples are not very helpful for OP.
Every child is an individual and it really can just depend as to how they are feeling on the day.
Adults and older teenagers generally don’t feel awkward and are happy to join in but an 11 year old is just at the awkward hormonal age and can be quite self conscious.
Leave him alone ,no extra eggs that he didn’t find .Am intrigued by people saying to ‘make’ him join in…how do you ‘make’ anyone do something they don’t want to do ?

Everyone piling on and saying just leave him alone, he doesn't have to join in - did you actually read what the op write? She hasnt said he has to join in, all she's asked is if he should get the extra eggs from the hunt.

Op - if he doesn't want to join then no he shouldn't have the extra eggs. I wonder if he'll change his mind about doing it, if he hears everyone else running around having fun.

And he's 11. That's getting to the age where egg hunts are lame.

Yeah.

If you are fine with him not joining in why are you punishing him by not giving him the boxed eggs? Food/treats shouldn’t be used as reward and punishment.

It's not fun if it's forced.

Let him be and don't punish him for it.

Why would you turn off the wifi? Why would you punish him for wanting to stay quietly out of the way?

Again, if there are issues with how much he is gaming, then that should be dealt with every day on an ongoing basis, not just removing wifi on a day where there are visitors.

If he wants to stay in his room, let him. Just don't let him have the extra chocolate and eggs. And make sure to turn off the WiFi.

If he's off to his mum's, then make sure she knows about this. Otherwise he'll be telling her some penny dreadful about how hard done he is.

At his age he is old enough to choose not to take part. For my children I would expect them to be dressed and socialising even if they chose not to egg hunt. Staying in his room and gaming would not be acceptable in my house while we have visitors.

It's not from what the OP said - it's a general truth. Games are addictive - they are specifically designed to be so. Eleven year olds sometimes need a bit of a push to learn social skills and do things. It's just part of parenting.

(I'm not advocating forcing kids to do things that they don't want to do. However there is a lot that can be done with gentle encouragement and boundaries).

Why on earth would you take his tech away? 11 is a bit old for Easter egg hunts, let him be!

I think you should leave him be to his gaming if that will make him happier - it’s his Easter break too and the participation in an egg hunt for plastic eggs being expected of an 11 year old sounds tedious.

I would however expect him to come downstairs and grace you all with his presence at least say hello to everyone at some point though - as he is part of the family and I would tell him that.
He should still get the extra treats and not be excluded.

I don’t think mentioning him being overweight has any relevance and I think as other posters have said it does hint towards the impression of you harvesting some negativity towards him.

I wouldn't be forcing an 11 year old to join in an egg hunt. My son is 11 and wants to join in with his siblings tomorrow as is our tradition, but if next year he turns around and says he doesn't want to join in, that's absolutely fine.
He wouldn't get any of the extra treats from the hunt though.

Why would you punish a child because they don't want to be involved in an Easter egg hunt? He's 11, not 6.
WATF am I reading?
I tell you what, there's some people who shouldn't be parents, he's a child, not a concentration camp inmate.

I think 11 is too old for this game.