To expect DH to shut the fuck up now?

I just tell him for fuck sake shut the fuck up I'm sorting it your being an annoying cunt.

Please tell him to fuck off next time he brings it up. You’ve tried telling him politely.

Yes he should STFU. My DH is the same. Goes on and on if I make a mistake with anything, even though I fix it, but anything he does is excusable. I come from a very pragmatic family, particularly my dad, who just views stuff breaking or people breaking stuff, as part of life. My reaction to what you’ve described is something like ‘oh. well. that sucks. how can we fix it?, whereas my husband freaks out and then talks about it for the next year like it’s realy interesting. Is it just a male thing?? I mean I just think ‘no one died or got hurt, it’s annoying but not a big deal’

Have you tried being very blunt? "Thanks dh, do you think you could give it a rest and stop highlighting my mistake to everyone we meet. It was a mistake, don't make out you've never made a mistake in your life. Anyone would think you are almost enjoying making me look bad" followed by a long hard Paddington stare.

I suspect you are usually very competent and he feels a little inadequate, so in a rather ungallant fashion is using this opportunity to boost his own ego.

He's being a twat.

Everyone makes mistakes and the people who love us should be the first to drop it.

This isn't about the electrics. He is just using this as an excuse to abuse and humiliate you because he is an asshole. You have probably seen this attitude from him in other things over your relationship.

And FWIW DH did exactly the same thing last month. Forgot he was filling the bath (because he wandered off and did something else) and we had a massive flood in my beloved downstairs cloak room (which has a chandelier!!) and the ceiling has caved in.

I said ' Shit and bugger. Oh well- it was an accident. When can we get a plasterer in?'.

Because I'm fucking normal. And not into berating the person I love for a mistake.

My son did this the other week. Our downstairs lights started tripping the fuse board. Make sure you give it a good few days to dry out you might find that you don’t actually need to call an electrician in

Quite frankly that would be a marriage breaker for me. How long does he want to punish you for? How does he not know that accidents happen?

He sounds like a superior arsehole who is actively enjoying making you feel bad.

Is this an ongoing sort of issue?

I couldn't live with that, what a petty and unpleasant man. Ask him what the point is of continually whingeing about it other than to shame you, particularly in front of others. I like a PP's idea of a bingo card when he starts on.

Me personally I married Frank Spencer (for those younger than 50 he was the accident prone main character in a 70s sitcom Some Mothers do 'Av' 'Em). I'm so used to his cock ups they barely merit a mention. Just deal with it and move on. Our DC grew up with it so know no different, but when new people, such as my son in law, enter our domestic sphere they are a bit bemused/amused to say the least. Son in law once witnessed a particularly annoying 'accident' of Frank's and looked at me aghast anticipating a reaction. I simply said "now you know why I have the demeanour of a Zen Buddhist", and got on with dealing with the fallout.

My ex husband hammered a nail through a water pipe in our bedroom when he was redoing the floors. Flooded the dining room, and left me a note on the back door telling me to not go in the affected rooms, and apologising for using all the bath towels. Plumber had fixed the leaks but the ceiling was damaged.

He was so apologetic, saying it was an accident. I was saying, of course it’s an accident, no one, NO ONE, would have done that on purpose, for goodness sake.🙂 Stupid mistake, but not something to keep going on about.

The other option is to laugh and agree.
Agree that you were sick and not thinking and makelight of it.

Op, you should think about getting a bath with an over flow.
Once the bath is three quarters full the excess water empties down the drain through another tube fromthe outlet hole.

You can also buy very tall plugs that have an overflow down the centre. You fill your bath using the tall plug then swap to a normal plug just before you hop in.

Hope you're starting to feel better soon OP.
My DH can be a bit of a prick but when I'm ill he offers to run baths for me, tell yours if he'd been a bit more caring this wouldn't have happened 😒 sort of joking.

I would want to know what his ‘thought process’ was to be still banging on about it.

Write him a sorry note.
Write that you are organising and paying for the repairs and slap that down on the table.
Ask husband to now please stop talking about the lights.
Tell husband that you feel demoralised when he talks about it to others and that he comes across as a cross old husband.
Ask if he can now forgive you?
Ask if he would apreciate you forgiving him in future should he flood the sink,have a car crash etc.

If he starts to speak about it again point to the note and leave his company.
Buy some ear plugs.

Sleep deprivation made me forget about a running tap in the kitchen last week. it ran over, and water filled my kitchen. I was so angry at myself as it ran under our appliances. Nobody does these things on purpose. DH never made me feel bad about it, he got down and helped me dry it all up, said of course it's annoying but these things happen.

I got into trouble as a child just for having a bath and letting the water out. How else do you get the water out?
The water went through to downstairs, but that was hardly my fault.

Does your home insurance not cover this @op ?

I'd expect it to be mentioned several times a day until fixed TBH, but in either a practical sense, or occasionally some frustration at a particular inconvenience, or maybe, depending on your relationship, a jokey, "this is sort of funny isn't it really I suppose" kind of sense, as long as nobody found the jokes upsetting or felt they were being got at.

Things like "Ow I stubbed my toe, hope the guy comes round to fix the lights soon", or "Do you know if you left the coffee on the far counter? I tried to have a quick look, but, y'know, lights, lack of", or a reference to the new sexy mood lighting in the living room with an offer to snuggle up, or "Pass me the torch! I'm going to brave the ensuite, send a search party if I'm not back in an hour" — you know, general communication and maybe some crap but hopefully camaraderie-building jokes.

I can't see the point of repeated references to the original cause, or constantly reiterating that you're going to pay for it when you've already said you will (which would really piss me off — it's like calling you a liar, a shirker, and irresponsible, all at once).

Have you told him to stop going on?

I was in a situation where someone kept banging on about something I’d done that they felt aggrieved about, I dared to resign! After six meetings and repeated mentions of my heinous crime, I told them to stop. Just stop! This was a man who’d never heard the word no or stop in his life. He did!

I still worked out my notice in fairly awful atmosphere but he stopped banging on about the injustice of my daring to leave! Twat!

Just tell your DH to stop and if you have and he’s still going on, tell him to fuck off.

It's dickhead behaviour.

You made a mistake. Berating you and huffing about it won't undo the mistake and presumably you've apologised as well as doing all the sorting to rectify it so that's it, case closed.

My partner did something monumentally dense a couple of weeks ago that culminated into something expensive of mine being destroyed. It was an honest mistake/accident, he apologised profusely and will rectify it. Bar a bit of comedic re-living of the escapade on both sides, that's the end of it.

Your husband is being an arsehole.

So I (a woman) will confess to having a petty moan from time to time at my husband; you forgot my tea, where’s my cup of tea, HELLO TEA etc. if I am in a terrible mood or trying to be funny. I appreciate this is not nice and trying to do better but just being honest.

but when something major happens I check he’s ok, help make a plan of action, accept it and try to make sure he doesn’t punish himself about it. There’s no need for a pile on. And he does the same for me. As for money - we’d definitely be sharing the cost.

point is when chips are down we are a team. (And if he gets annoyed of my petty whining, I STFU).

Yet another useless prick making a woman's life harder. Why do people bother being in relationships anymore?