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AIBU?

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To feel a bit jealous about this woman and DH?

108 replies

pinkmushroom5 · 27/03/2024 12:26

My DH has just had a very small promotion at work. It's been expected for a while and not a particularly big change from his current role, really. We went out for a drink to celebrate but no one did any cards/ gifts as it wasn't a huge thing (he didn't have to interview or anything like that).

But today I've noticed a card on the mantelpiece which is from a female colleague who is his junior, he sometimes talks about her in a friendly way but I didn't think anything of it. But the image on the front of the card is of a very specific hobby that he does in his spare time - she must have sought out the card from Etsy or something because it's not something you'd get on the high street.

Inside is gushing praise about how 'delighted' she is and how well deserved it is along with a little doodle of herself.

It's the only card he's received.

Is there something going on here? I feel a bit weird about it but I don't know if I'm being overly jealous.

OP posts:
ViciousCurrentBun · 27/03/2024 12:41

Well him putting it on the mantlepiece is a good thing as he isn’t trying to hide it. Most people like flattery. Are there women who pursue married men, well of course there are. It just depends on the man’s responses. I would be watchful of any changes in him. Call me an old cynic but seen too much crap my sisters and friends have been through. I myself had a great male friend of a decade at work. Until DH and I had a rough patch and the friend made a pass. I told DH.

Dacadactyl · 27/03/2024 12:41

I wouldnt like it either, but I'd not say anything.

I would however keep an eye out.

If there was something going on, I can't imagine he'd be brazen enough to put the card up.

ScaredAndPanicky · 27/03/2024 12:40

Id be more worried if he had tried to hide it. Putting it on display he probably hasn't even thought twice about it. I tend to give cards/small gifts to people even if they are just feeling down (male or female).

KalaMush · 27/03/2024 12:37

I think a card on a promotion (even a small one) is ok and nothing to worry about. I would keep an eye on this though - just in case!

MerryChristmasToYou · 27/03/2024 12:36

Trust your gut.

pinkmushroom5 · 27/03/2024 12:36

bottomsup12 · 27/03/2024 12:33

Is she much younger than him? Either way sounds like she's sucking up to him because he's going places and it would help her career maybe.
Hopefully he doesn't go weird about this bit of flattery. What has he said about it? Does he encourage it?

I think she's a bit younger yes and certainly way below him in the chain of management at work. She might be sucking up a bit, I don't know.

I haven't said anything to him about it because he's at work today and I only just noticed it - but also I don't want to be unnecessarily weird about it.

I do get a bit jealous sometimes (after previous bad experience in relationships) so I actively try to keep it in check and not worry too much about friendships. But this just made me feel weird.

OP posts:
Whataterror · 27/03/2024 12:35

You’re not BU for your feelings to be your feelings, but it doesn’t necessarily mean there’s anything to it. If it were me I would thinking if anything untoward were going on then he wouldn’t be putting the card on display.

bottomsup12 · 27/03/2024 12:33

Is she much younger than him? Either way sounds like she's sucking up to him because he's going places and it would help her career maybe.
Hopefully he doesn't go weird about this bit of flattery. What has he said about it? Does he encourage it?