To expect at least a proper thank you

I was looking at her the whole time she was thanking people and when she sat down she glanced over at me and saw me staring. Later on she said "I thanked everyone but you didn't i?" I said yeah and that was it, she still didn't thank me lol

For me, the question would be whether you consulted with her about what she wanted, or did you decide for yourself? Given that you say you are not a mind reader, it sounds like you didn't ask her

I would talk to her. Not via text. An actual conversation. Tell her you heard she was disappointed, that was not your intention, and what your intention was. Give her a chance to apologise to you.

That’s awful. Did you say anything to her?

It's done now but I would have to bring it up. Say you're sorry if she didn't enjoy it , but you tried your best and it was all organised with her in mind.
Ungrateful madam.

Take a major step back and say a polite but firm no to helping with anything in the future.
The bride sounds incredibly rude and ungrateful. It sounds like whatever you would have done wouldn't have been right.

She should have organised it herself. That would be the last effort I put in for the ungrateful cow.
I hate all the "she must have been stressed" bollocks. There's really no excuse for being nasty to your friends and family.

I think she's either very rude or something's upset her. I think I'd have to have a gentle chat with her. Something along the lines of "Is everything OK between us? I spent a lot of time and effort organising your hen do and I can't help feeling something is off. You haven't said thank you and you only said it was fine. I feel like you might be upset about something. Please can let me know? I've been very worried about it and feeling sick."

No, don't bring it up, you done your best, she could have been more involved with the planning, she could have planned it herself. You have said everyone else enjoyed it as did you. Next time she asked for help with something, just raise your eyebrows and wish-per hen do!

She sounds like a demanding bitch with no friends who wanted to organise it for her.

Seriously, drop the rope with the twat and never do anything for her again. Why are you all pussyfooting around her?

Don't bother. Life's too short to put up with shitty behaviour. Grey rock all the way. People like this feed off your insecurity and pain.

Urgh. Wouldn’t bring it up with her. Wouldn’t be doing things for her again!

I'm amazed at the amount of people, according to mumsnet, out there having loads of favours done for them and being given thoughtful presents, that have a history of being selfish, rude and ungrateful.

Just why?!

She sounds ungrateful tbh. If you want to I'd continue to be friends but keep her at arms length. I wouldn't be doing anything else for her.

My bf was really rude to me and another friend (both bridesmaids) We told her (after the event) that her behaviour was unacceptable and she apologised. Is it worth saying anything, would anything be achieved?

I had a “friend” like this OP- I remember the anxiety, the sleepless nights, the never knowing where I stood!

The only way to deal with someone like that is to stop being friends with her.

my SiL never said thank you for lots of things we have done include a huge effort to make a quilt consisting of patches from all her hens and family and friends as a wedding gift. Hours of effort from everyone and I never heard a word about it (I was a contributor not organised). When o saw it in real life for the first time k was like wow it’s gorgeous and I didn’t realise u had it now and she just looked at me. Sent her flowers last week for her bday and not even a message to say thanks. I checked the tracking info to ensure they were delivered but I’m not chasing her. She is very selfish and ignorant in general so I am just used to it now o guess - i don’t like it at all and think it
is very rude

What an ungrateful cow.

Don't do anything for her again. I'd be civil but no more than that.

Definitely move on. You organised a weekend that all the other guests enjoyed and it sounds as if nothing would have satisfied her. Don't chase it up with other family members either. It's in the past.
Going forwards don't let yourself get too invested in her or your relationship. Her opinion doesn't really matter to you, you know your own worth.

Next time she asks you to do anything be super charming and smile and say "oh no, I got it so wrong last time I think it's best if I don't"
and never help her again.

If I'd had someone like you care enough to organise an entire weekend hen party, with family & friends of all ages, and guests loved, I'd be ecstatic. It wouldn't matter if if wasn't perfectly to my taste. I've never had anyone like this in my life so I think you're amazing OP. & She's just entitled.

Lesson learned for next time!

if it was a hen party she surely has the main event, the wedding, on her mind now
give her time

Life is too short to allow yourself to be twisted into knots and second guess yourself over other people's behaviour. The time to raise it was when you first asked if she was OK and she was passive aggressive. You didn't raise it then and I probably wouldn't now unless you are going to be firm and establish some boundaries. You don't come across as someone that will do that now. I'd focus your energy on your counselling and look at targeting how you respond to this type of behaviour, how you can put boundaries in place by valuing your self worth etc.

Don't bring it up as she won't change. But do have better boundaries and don't place yourself in a position again of having to do something special for her or something that's more intimate/time intensive like holidays, events etc.

Sounds like you really tried @Ladylike0

Don't bring it up, but keep your distance and never go out of your way to help her again.

@Ladylike0 honestly? Some people are just rude and ungrateful. My own mother did this to me. After I drove 300 miles down to her wedding venue. Helped set up. Paid for her hair and make up and hotel for the night before the wedding. Arranaged transport when a car failed to show. Gathered people for photos and to sign the wedding book and stopped teenagers from cutting into the cake. Helped her get into her evening dress, and sewed on a button that had popped off. Went to a local shop to buy ice creams for 100 guests as they were all dying from the heat. I also made intricate centre pieces for the tables. She made a speech and thanked my brother (for giving her away, (literally thats all he did) his wife, my aunty, her husband, her work friends and her husband's family. Nothing for me though.