A wedding question

Op there’s no point looking for a helpful discussion on destination weddings on here! Mn hates them because it hates people having fun or nice things, weddings should just be registry office and pub meal job done and everyone should just drive a Ford fiesta as it gets you from a to b 🙄🙄

we’re getting married in Cyprus next year. I hate Uk weather I love the sun and heat and I didn’t fancy a soggy muddy Uk wedding that costs £40k. Our AI holiday for 2 wks in Cyprus is around £5k for 2 adults, 3yo and 1yo. Wedding will then be around £15k, but can do it a lot cheaper.

Cyprus and Greece you can get legally married. Spain you can’t, you need to also go to Uk registry office. Santorini is not cheap however it’s about the same cost or more as a Uk wedding and because it’s a small island holidays there are more expensive too. You could look at Crete, Rhodes, Cyprus.
you can book packages where you get married at a hotel for just a few thousand.

PEOPLE DIE OP!!!! what on earth are you playing at waiting even a day more?!l! How do you even sleep at night with the weight of this risk upon you?! 😂

£30k??? I'm sorry, your friend is insane!

Our wedding was £6k 10 years ago...my friend is having a wedding which is costing her £7k in a few weeks time. Church wedding, 80 day guests and another 50 at night. Without going in to a million specifics... My friend is using a very pretty local village hall as the venue, hiring an outside bar who charge only if they don't make £1000 on the day (which with 130 guests they absolutely will) using a local caterer for the wedding breakfast, homemade decorations with Jam jars, vases, fresh flowers, wedding favours just a nice chocolate per person, tying a pretty ribbon around the back of the chair, using a great local band who don't charge sully money for evening entertainment, dress from a lady who sells last season's dresses at a fraction of the price (loads of these sellers around) etc. Will be beautiful, magical, personal and DEFINITELY doesn't need to cost the earth.

Weddings are all about you but are also a surefire way to ruffle feathers!

Congratulations (soon hopefully)!

If going for abroad I would suggest somewhere you have been before, that was a special holiday. It is a big risk to base the location on others opinions. Your opinion could be very different

For thos country would you consider a church wedding? Personally I think this is a lovely way to marry. For a reception I would try to consider venues that are not typically wedding venues. Specifics difficult without a location

I've only been to one of the destination weddings I was invited to because it was somewhere I wanted to go to and the bride and groom massively subsided the cost.
Wedding venues in the UK can be costly if you go for a package and include lots of expense and additions.
We had a local registry office for a handful of people and then a big party in a building we hired - paid for everything and a hot/cold buffet plus dancing and face painting for kids and it was around £2 or 3k in total, wasn't expensive for a wedding with a lot of guests. Then we got the beach part by going on holiday (with DD as she was quite little still).
You can have a really good wedding without it breaking the bank but you have to swerve the wedding industry to do so.

Then do it in the UK. It can still be far away from his parents

But you don't have to get married in a Register Office in the UK any moreso than you do abroad? Plenty of places that could host a reception are also licensed to hold a ceremony there too.

Totally agree that the wedding ceremony should be wholly about the couple and their marriage, the party and celebrations not so much if you want other people to enjoy it too, otherwise you risk entering Bride and Groomzilla territory.

If you want 80 guests at a fashionable venue on a Saturday in the summer, 4 bridesmaids, 4 groomsmen, suits and dresses, £2k wedding dress, photographer, videographer, lots of fresh flowers, DJ/band, photobooth, decor etc etc. yes you’ll struggle to do it for less than £20k.

It can be done for a whole lot less. I work in the wedding industry so I see both ends of the spending. Go off peak, weekday, less guests, nice but not trendy venue, and you can do it all in for £10k and still have a great day.

I have no desire to get married, but if I did, and my partner had held out for 9 years then agreed, but for 3 years hence, alarm bells would be going off.
@askingaquestionaboutthis Have you made proper legal arrangements for the protection of you and your children?

But by insisting on it because you want it, you’re expecting that the universe will order it so that everything else falls in with your plans. I’m pointing out that things are rarely so simple.

It sounds as though for you, having a wedding is more important than being married, so you just need to be prepared that the wedding bit won’t go exactly as you’re picturing it, or you’re in for potential disappointment.

Three years is a ridiculous engagement for anybody. When you've been together 9 years and have kids even more so. Just have the wedding you can afford in the least stressful way for everybody.

Fair enough. I'd pay it all for her if it were my sister as she'd be saving to take the kids to Disney or something she wants to do

Rubbish I'd did mine for just under £8000

A wedding can cost a lot but on the other end of the scale far, far less. It depends what you want and I agree I think a smaller venue UK wedding would be cheaper and less stressful to navigate than a wedding abroad. Trying to get everyone to get the same week off work might be difficult. It depends where they all work. Flights, hotels, transport to and from the airports.

We have been to weddings where we have been roped into collecting the fucking flowers from the church to move them to the venue afterwards,. Had we not been asked to put them in the boot of our car I would never have noticed them. No one really gives a shit about your table centre pieces, your chair covers or ribbons which match the bridesmaids or the colour theme of the wedding. These are all things that some people feel they need to add to their wedding that add to the cost. Dh's mate's wife is a wedding planner and she says people get very caught up in the minutia and forget it is a one day party.

Why did you “wait” 9 years if you wanted to be married you could’ve asked him?

why are you asking about weather and costs etc when you’re still waiting on him to propose?

I’ll ‘wait’ on tetchy reply…

No its not mine was a wedding ceremony that was about us but the rest of the day was just an excuse for family to bond