To be in this job and feel poor?

Well if they have, I feel for them but that doesn’t negate the disheartened feelings of the OP. The old ‘there’s always someone worse off than you’ wears thin. It’s not at all helpful. I can see why many professionals are emigrating and university applications are falling. UK salaries are horrendous, there is no incentive in career development

Why are you presuming they haven't?

We're all paying for lock down from 4 years ago. Still a way to go yet.
It's overwhelming studying long degrees and still not earning as much as a train driver years later.
Consider working in the middle east for a bit. Even very wealthy people do that to accrue more income.
I hope you find a way round it soon.

Op I hear you.

You feel like you did all the 'right' things and you were sold a lie. It hasn't been worth it.

You will get people on here saying that you be grateful for what you have but that doesn't change how you feel.

If they’d give their right arm, I assume they’d also get into £100k of debt and study for 7 years to be in her position. So why aren’t they?

I think car finance is a bit of a swizz. We're persuaded that we need a car on finance because everyone else has a car on finance. You don't. I've never spent more than £5k on a car, and my cars have always been very very reliable and lasted me for years and years. My current car is 14 years old, and it's absolutely fine! One year I bought a car on a 0% credit card and paid it off within a year. That's got to be better than spending ££££ on a new car on finance, surely? You sound like you're doing fine OP, but some tweaks could make a massive difference. You have bought a property on your own, that's something many people could never do. Get rid of the car on finance and buy a cheap one, the save up for another cheap one when this one dies. If you can't get out of the finance deal, put yourself in a position where you never get a car on finance again. Don't get into debt for things that depreciate, that's a good rule to live by. Debt for a house is fine, debt for a car is not.

You are in the top 10% of earners in the country and own your own home.

Lots of people would give their right arm to be in your position.

But you are not poor.

Being single does it and people never get that.

Go to a financial adviser. Anyone earning 58K a year should be able to support themselves. £800 mortgage increased by £500? Go to a financial adviser. Hundreds every month on student loan? Go to a financial adviser! Car payments - just what kind of car? Go to a financial adviser! On £58K, you should be able to afford a £1300 a-month-mortgage. Easily. Our mortgage was £1600 on the same salary with two adults and a child in the home. We budget carefully, but didn't eat beans on toast three nights a week.

Why are millennials not having children? Can barely support ourselves on one good salary

All these posters saying take in a lodger: did you not read the post the other day about the woman who took in a lodger for a few weeks and can't get the stinky feet smell out of her house? Gross.

Being single is really expensive. I couldn't believe it when I moved in with my first DP (relatively old, having been single all my twenties) and we put our finances together and realised how relatively well off we were going to be.

If she lived in a cheaper area her salary would likely reflect that.

The OP is voicing an issue that affects many around the same age who did what they were supposed to in the belief that hard work and a solid career choice would be worth it.

Well it doesn’t feel great but it’s not a waste is it? You could be in a lower paid job and struggling more to get by, with little hope
of getting on the housing ladder. It is likely your earning potential will increase over time.

My job pays significantly less than yours. I did 9 years of uni and my level of qualifications are absolutely necessary for my role. On top of that I have 10 years experience. Yeah it’s not amazing but it’s the line of work I chose and I’m much better off than many.

I don’t think her issue is that she is ‘poor’. It’s that she has worked hard and studied for 7 years to get into a career that in previous generations would have provided I high quality of life for an entire family

First of all, I get it. I'm on a larger salary than you and I also feel like I'm still having to be financially frugal. You've followed the rules, but the games keeps changing. On that salary, you should be comfortable but you're not.

The reality is that we were a generation raised with certain expectations of working hard and being rewarded, but we've been screwed over by myriad factors:

1. Salaries have not kept up with inflation. The average salary in 2008 was around £25K. The equivalent salary today is worth about £51K based on inflation, but the actual average salary is just shy of £35K.
2. University was pushed as the way to advance yourself, yet tuitions fees kept rising and rising, and so has debt. Students graduating are essentially saddled with an extra tax which can be hundreds of pounds out of their pay check that older students did not have.
3. House prices have risen far above inflation. In the 50s buying a house cost about twice the average annual salary - so in today's money, that's £70K. For a house! Nowadays buying a house costs about 8.7x the average salary. Literally even if you can scrape together enough money for a deposit, its near impossible for someone on the average salary to get a mortgage that's big enough to buy a property, and if you can its often a leasehold property which comes with myriad extra costs and issues.
4. There's more to buy with your money now and in the 21st century we are constantly bombarded with advertising designed to make us want to part with our money. Resistance is futile.
5. Dating is harder and people are staying single for longer. Being single is more expensive, so it takes people longer to build up any financial security. And dating is also harder, and more expensive than it once was.
6. Childcare costs! For those that do settle down, due to myriad factors (see above points) its not feasible for most couple's to have a stay at home parent. In fact the macroeconomic benefits of having two income families have been heavily encouraged by most governments globally... but this means most families now do need to pay for childcare, and the UK childcare costs are higher than many other countries, and between 2010 and 2021 UK child care costs grew twice as fast as average earnings
7. Debt! Debt is positively encouraged - going back to constant advertising and temptation, marketers are ready to manipulate you and encourage impulse purchasers - enter the likes of klarma, and of cars on finance. Its a lot easier to buy what you shouldn't afford, whereas historically you would have had to save and save to purchase, now you purchase, and then have to constantly pay off your debt.

So yes, its tough. But the reality is, your doing a lot better than a lot of other folks. Unfortunately if you may have to compromise a little bit, in budgeting and reducing your cost of living or by increasing your income a little.

If someone said to me I'd be 35, and in the top 10% of earners I'd be thrilled. I would not have envisaged myself living in a one bed flat, with driving what is essentially a student car.

It doesn't feel fair, but its where we are at.... the glory of late stage capitalism and the growing wealth inequality.

Living alone and paying the household bills on a sole income is tough, I've done it solo for 25 years and on a lower wage than yourself but I can sympathise with the mortgage increase 😔.
Your car loan is probably the easiest fix. Just get rid of it and get a cheaper runabout to get by for 2 or 3 years until the financial storm hopefully blows over.
Also, as others have said, consider a lodger, but choose carefully 😉.
Good luck.

YANBU. i have a masters degree and over a decade in a career i was very dedicated to. now at 37 i don’t know what i’ve been working for, so hard to have a good standard with how expensive everything is, it’s like being on a hamster wheel!

Didn’t say she was.

Everything is incredibly harsh and intolerable.

But if she chooses to live in an expensive area in the current economic environment, living alone is a luxury.

Ffs. Living alone is not a luxury. There is nothing more depressing than a 40-something yesr old looking for a shared house because that's all they can afford even though they have a FT professional job (a conversation I just had with a dear friend - and the boat I'd be in if I had met dh).
I literally have friends who can't afford to divorce. And I also spent 10 years studying, though luckily I got paid for some of it.

I feel like the generational gap of understanding realities of life is just beyond ridiculous sometimes. My mum's friend told me I could afford a bigger house if I just had less takeaways. Hadn't realised that the £60 a month to uber eats would get me an extra bedroom!

To have a comfortable quality of life, and contribute to a prosperous future, most people can’t live alone and it is very naive to suggest otherwise.

You have every right to feel this way. You’ve worked hard and are not seeing the results you expected (and had every right to expect). I would hate having a lodger too. Can you pick up some additional income other ways?

Living alone is a luxury

Hilarious. Maybe getting married and having kids is a luxury?
In reality neither is a luxury and this type of infighting helps no one.

Life is a long game and you’re only 35. In 10 years (or however long) you’ll have paid off your debts and have a much higher salary than most. That’s when all the studying etc will have paid off. But your energy costs are huge for one person - there’s definitely money to be saved there.

Living alone is a luxury.. get a grip! It’s madness that we are living in an economy where someone’s earning 58k and struggling to live alone. OP is not the problem