Mothers day | Mumsnet

WhatYouWearing · 14/03/2024 10:33

Scaffoldingisugly · 12/03/2024 12:18

Take it as a sign of bigger picture where you manage more than fine without that waste of space...

@Winniethepooh88 you might think we're all being a bit harsh here but this isn't really about football. There's such a bigger picture.

Losing your own mum meant he should have realised how hard that day was going to be for you, regardless of what he has done (or hasn't done) other years. It's not the football, it's the thoughtlessness and you deserve so much better than this

Bythefireside · 12/03/2024 15:59

Winniethepooh88 · 12/03/2024 12:11

Update:
I went out with my children for Mother's Day surprisingly it wasn't as stressful as I first thought.

Well done 👏🏻👏🏻

GoodAfternoonGoodEveningAndGoodnight · 12/03/2024 15:38

Aw, glad you went out. Hope you had a lovely time

WhingeInTheWillows · 12/03/2024 12:50

I’m glad you and the children went, I hope you enjoyed it. I’m really sorry about your mum, it’s hard isn’t it?
I’d decide now how I would like to be treated next Mother’s Day and spend the next few months planning how to make that happen.

ZekeZeke · 12/03/2024 12:41

I'm glad you went out, hope you had a lovely meal.
He can support his football team but not his wife. Says it all really.

Maray1967 · 12/03/2024 12:34

Winniethepooh88 · 12/03/2024 12:11

Update:
I went out with my children for Mother's Day surprisingly it wasn't as stressful as I first thought.

Delighted to read that. I hope he went hungry - probably just raided the cupboards though.
If you do his laundry stop now. Concentrate on you and your DC and make plans to dump this selfish excuse for a man.

Sympathy on the loss of your mum 💐

Silvers11 · 12/03/2024 12:22

Winniethepooh88 · 12/03/2024 12:11

Update:
I went out with my children for Mother's Day surprisingly it wasn't as stressful as I first thought.

Good for you OP. Glad you went out and it wasn't too stressful. What did OH do? I hope he only had beans on toast or similar 😉

Scaffoldingisugly · 12/03/2024 12:18

Take it as a sign of bigger picture where you manage more than fine without that waste of space...

Original poster

Winniethepooh88 · 12/03/2024 12:11

Update:
I went out with my children for Mother's Day surprisingly it wasn't as stressful as I first thought.

OP posts:

GoodAfternoonGoodEveningAndGoodnight · 10/03/2024 19:29

@Winniethepooh88 I hope you ended up having a lovely day and went for your meal out x

nowayhey · 10/03/2024 11:25

OP please tell us you're going ahead to the meal with your children? Happy Mother's Day to you, have a great day 💗 🌸

WhatYouWearing · 10/03/2024 09:16

I did talk to him, 5 weeks ago I booked this meal and asked him he said it's fine. Every week since then I mentioned it and I even brought it up Tuesday and mentioned I want to go to my mother's resting spot before hand by myself. So I did speak to him and he's had a chance this week to even tell me.

Then he's an even bigger dick than I first thought. Hope you manage to get something good out of today

Dragonsandcats · 10/03/2024 08:34

I hope you have a lovely Mother’s Day lunch with your children 🌺 and just maybe it will send a message to your dh that he will think about.

ColleenDonaghy · 09/03/2024 17:21

Boomer55 · 09/03/2024 17:04

If your mum is around, invite her. Not sure why you think he should have bothered with flowers/card. You are not his mum.🤔

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If you'd read the thread you would know that she lost her mum two months ago, she's feeling fragile and grieving. And that's why she thought the man who's supposed to love her might show her a little care and acknowledge the mothering she does for their little children, who are too young to organise anything on their own.

ElaineMBenes · 09/03/2024 17:18

If your mum is around, invite her. Not sure why you think he should have bothered with flowers/card. You are not his mum.🤔

At least make an effort to read the OPs updates!!

And no, she isn't his mum, she's the mother of his young children who need some help arranging a card and present.
Children aren't born with the innate knowledge and ability to acknowledge important events. They need to be taught that by their parents!!

ShinyAppleDreamingOfTheSea · 09/03/2024 17:18

I'm sorry for the loss of your mum @Winniethepooh88

I think that under the circumstances your partner should be being a lot kinder .

That aside - I can see a little bit from both sides, but only because my DH is a mad sports fan so I could see him also wanting to cancel a meal to watch a match . I guess they have added importance with the end of the season approaching .

But - he is totally unreasonable in expecting you to actually cook a meal . Given your DC are too young to do anything for you themselves, he should be taking them to get you a card/flowers/whatever and then ordering a takeaway so you can all sit down and relax .

And he should be being especially kind and thoughtful as you have just lost your mum .

devildeepbluesea · 09/03/2024 17:14

Every now and then on MN I am genuinely shocked at the arseholery some women put up with from their spouses. Some threads really do highlight the very worst of men-kind, and this is one of them.

OP I hope you have a lovely day with your children tomorrow and that the pain of your mum’s death slowly becomes less raw. And then, I really hope you find yourself a shit hot lawyer and take this selfish cunt to the cleaners.

Original poster

Winniethepooh88 · 09/03/2024 17:10

Boomer55 · 09/03/2024 17:04

If your mum is around, invite her. Not sure why you think he should have bothered with flowers/card. You are not his mum.🤔

Show quote history

My mom isn't here she passed away 2 months ago. My children are 7 and my youngest is 2. A simple card for once from my children would've been a big deal this year, I know I am not his mother! But my children can't go to the card factory by themselves?

OP posts:

TeaKitten · 09/03/2024 17:10

Boomer55 · 09/03/2024 17:04

If your mum is around, invite her. Not sure why you think he should have bothered with flowers/card. You are not his mum.🤔

Show quote history

Try reading her posts then you can see why she can’t invite her mum.

Original poster

Winniethepooh88 · 09/03/2024 17:05

WhatYouWearing · 09/03/2024 15:57

As you have a man-child for a partner it would have been better to talk to him before you booked it.

There's no point anyone telling you what you already know. That he's a selfish prick.

I did talk to him, 5 weeks ago I booked this meal and asked him he said it's fine. Every week since then I mentioned it and I even brought it up Tuesday and mentioned I want to go to my mother's resting spot before hand by myself. So I did speak to him and he's had a chance this week to even tell me.

OP posts:

Boomer55 · 09/03/2024 17:04

Winniethepooh88 · 09/03/2024 10:53

I'm 5 months pregnant with already two children, Mother's Day coming up and every Sunday I normally cook but as I knew Mother's Day was coming I booked a table and even paid deposit for us all.
today I found out that his favourite football team are playing the same time I booked this meal 5 weeks ago.
he's now said we have to cancel and he will go food shopping now so I can cook us a roast tomorrow instead.

let's not forgot the fact that I've never had a Mother's Day card in 7 years or even a bunch of £3 flowers.

aibu for being annoyed?

If your mum is around, invite her. Not sure why you think he should have bothered with flowers/card. You are not his mum.🤔

Phillippeflop · 09/03/2024 17:03

Moveoverdarlin · 09/03/2024 14:04

So you’ve bought his own Mother a card and a lovely present and taken it round to her? Even though you lost your own Mum? Jesus it gets worse. Why do you do this shit for him? I just wouldn’t do that! You’re constantly enabling him to be a selfish ass hole. I hope you don’t have daughters OP, your DH treats the women closest to him with complete disregard.

Before you leave for the meal I would be tempted to take the remote control for the TV. I would make sure come hell or high water he misses that football match. I mean this with the greatest respect but wise up! He treats you like shit. And he really is a shit Dad and husband.

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I agree with this op. He is a twat but you’ve been a bit of a mug and continue to be one. Why on earth have you bought his mum the Mother’s Day present? I also agree re the remote too.

LuckySantangelo35 · 09/03/2024 17:01

I think this is a unanimous YANBU

not one single person thinks you should cook a roast tomorrow OP

GoodAfternoonGoodEveningAndGoodnight · 09/03/2024 16:36

Winniethepooh88 · 09/03/2024 12:54

I wanted to see if Ive over reacted simple. I've decided to just go out and take my children. I'm seriously considering my future with him but that's another post.
it's not a bait post.

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I'm so sorry for your loss 💐💐
You deserve a lovely day out with your children, I'm glad you've decided to do this
If he moans, tough shit - he chose football instead so he'll just have to sort himself out.
His choice, his consequences.
Have a lovely meal with your kids tomorrow x

GoodAfternoonGoodEveningAndGoodnight · 09/03/2024 16:29

thistimelastweek · 09/03/2024 10:57

Go without him.
Don't cook the roast tomorrow.

This.
Don't miss out, and don't be cooking that roast!
Bollocks to that.
Let him bugger off to football and go without him.