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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

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Original poster

Hey Guys! Vs Hey Team!

143 replies

SwordToFlamethrower · 05/03/2024 14:23

In the 90s, I remember when people addressed a group of people as "hey guys and gals!" But then it got shortened to just "guys".

It really pees me off that they dropped addressing women and girls from a crowd. Why?

No one says "see that guy over there?" When it is a woman they're referring to, but a crowd of mixed sex people are defaulted to being male. In my mind, a "guy" is a male. Guy is an actual male name and saying "guys" feels sexist.

My amazing Yoga teacher addresses everyone as "Team" and I think this is really uplifting and inclusive! She will say "Ok Team, take a deep breath!" Or "Well done Team!" I feel included, confident and valued when addressed as part of a team.

The other day I went to visit a petting farm and a woman addressed a group of pregnant ewes as "guys" and I found it so utterly weird.

So I made a meme and ask, if you agree, to share it.

I'm on my mobile so can't activate the voting, apologies!

YABU - "Guys" is shorthand for women and for men

YANBU - "Team" instead of guys works better for addressing a mixed sex crowd of people

OP posts:

Thread gallery

BeLemonFish · 06/03/2024 17:47

🥱

Brefugee · 06/03/2024 15:55

I know perfectly well how language works. Are you always so patronizing

Refe to me as a guy after I've asked you not to and I will ignore everything. Especially if you want something from me (like payment)

You do you. I have only had a couple of issues with idiot "servers" in chain restaurants who have done it a second time. One was told to apologize - he did. But no tip. One was real located to a different table. Her replacement was excellent. Nice tip.

ASighMadeOfStone · 05/03/2024 21:58

SwordToFlamethrower · 05/03/2024 21:45

This is exactly it. Well put!

Show quote history

It isn't it, exactly. It isn't it at all.
It simply shows a spectacular lack of understanding of how language works.
There absolutely is male bias in some aspects of language usage.
Using the gender neutral "Guys" isn't an example of it.
Peter Trudgill's Sociolinguistics is a good starter book if you want to learn about it.

Original poster

SwordToFlamethrower · 05/03/2024 21:45

Brefugee · 05/03/2024 17:50

yes we have. But the smaller fish become bigger fish. I don't accept being referred to as "guy" and i will always mention it.

"Hello everyone" is fine, as is "hello"

And for those who will inevitably say "bigger fish to fry" and "doesn't bother me" bully for you. It bothers me. If i ask one of my male friends "how was the date with that guy yesterday?" they will mostly say "it was a woman"

Show quote history

This is exactly it. Well put!

OP posts:

VerityUnreasonble · 05/03/2024 21:45

TheMessiahIsMySister · 05/03/2024 20:44

I follow Man Who Has It All, too - ‘he’ is all over this sort of thing, @SwordToFlamethrower!

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Ah yes, I have this t-shirt that gets me an occasional puzzled look

Original poster

SwordToFlamethrower · 05/03/2024 21:42

TheMessiahIsMySister · 05/03/2024 20:44

I follow Man Who Has It All, too - ‘he’ is all over this sort of thing, @SwordToFlamethrower!

Show quote history

Yes, I follow that a lot! It is brilliant!

"I don't mind being called a male policewoman because it's gender neutral" says Peter, male policewoman

OP posts:

Blanketpolicy · 05/03/2024 21:12

SallyWD · 05/03/2024 14:49

Am I the only one who's more annoyed about the "hey"? To me it feels like a recent thing that people have started saying "hey" instead of "hi", "hello" or "dear so and so". I find "hey" very irritating.

”Hey” reminds me of my mum who always used to say “hey is for horses”

I guess trying to teach us it was an impolite way to address people then (would have been in the 70s/80s)

OkPedro · 05/03/2024 21:04

Queijo · 05/03/2024 14:24

I just call everyone a cunt and keep it equal

I've just opened this thread and I actually laughed out loud 🤣

ThinWomansBrain · 05/03/2024 21:03

For starters, I prefer "Hi" to "Hey"

NameNew · 05/03/2024 21:01

Guys sounds better than team. Team sounds cringey, especially in a setting such as a yoga class where you are not a team but a collection of individuals doing the same thing, for individual and not collective benefit.

Coffeewinecake · 05/03/2024 20:57

Kidswhowouldhavethem · 05/03/2024 14:35

This…I have never given it any headspace TBH !

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I said “hi guys” to my all female medical and nursing team this morning 😮

TheMessiahIsMySister · 05/03/2024 20:44

IsthisthereallifeIsthisjustfantasy · 05/03/2024 19:11

This reminds me of "The Man Who Has it All" satirical facebook page.

I follow Man Who Has It All, too - ‘he’ is all over this sort of thing, @SwordToFlamethrower!

stripes92 · 05/03/2024 20:35

YABU - I use 'guys' to address both sexes, I would use it for a group of women the same as I would for a mixed or men only group.

Brefugee · 05/03/2024 20:32

Glad I'm normally in Germany, tbh, because it's "hallo zusammen" which covers everything (hello everyone)

Edited for spelling

fantasmasgoria1 · 05/03/2024 20:28

Queijo · 05/03/2024 14:24

I just call everyone a cunt and keep it equal

You are quite right to do so! 🤣

Marblessolveeverything · 05/03/2024 20:27

"guys" will always be the goonies to me and my family. We were always referred to as "hey you guys!"

Schoolrunmumbun · 05/03/2024 19:43

I once asked my team at work (my actual team) to come up with an alternative for us instead of using Guys and they came up with Theydies and Gentethems. Piss take. We went back to Guys although nowadays I use team/ gang/ everyone/ all if I need a group word.

IsthisthereallifeIsthisjustfantasy · 05/03/2024 19:11

This reminds me of "The Man Who Has it All" satirical facebook page.

IAmAnIdiot123 · 05/03/2024 18:53

In this post Tiger King era, surely everyone greets groups of people with 'hey all you cool cats and kittens', no?

Notimeforaname · 05/03/2024 18:50

"Lads" seems to be use nowadays, as well. Really winds me up.

Weve been using that in Ireland for years. Went to an all girls school..we always called out to our groups as "lads". Maybe its more normal in Ireland...

AllProperTeaIsTheft · 05/03/2024 18:46

'Hey folks/everyone/you lot' works for me. I'm a teacher. I currently work in an all girls' school, but we have recently been instructed not to address the class as 'girls', for reasons I am sure you can imagine... This has been particularly annoying for those of us in the languages department, since you generally have the choice of the (default, obvs) male plural which counts as mixed too, or the female plural.

Blackcats7 · 05/03/2024 18:45

I hate “Hey”
What happened to hello, or dear or whatever.
Am off now to sit mumbling to myself about americanisation of british culture and language.

Ninaberlina · 05/03/2024 18:38

ancienticecream · 05/03/2024 14:33

I don't mind "well done, team" so much, but I hate it when it is used as a greeting, like "Hi team". No idea why it grates on me so much.

Worst of all is "folks". Go away with your folks nonsense.

Edited

Agree about “folks”. Not sure why, but I’m really not keen on it. Same goes for “peeps”.
Don’t really mind “guys” tbh… “Team” sounds weirdly corporate.

cardibach · 05/03/2024 18:36

Rainrainrainrainrainrainrain · 05/03/2024 17:56

If i ask one of my male friends "how was the date with that guy yesterday?" they will mostly say "it was a woman"

Quite

What about if he’d been out in a mixed group and you asked ‘how were the guys last night?’ Would he then say there were both men and women present, or would he understand you meant a mixed group?

StrawberrySquash · 05/03/2024 18:20

Hey guys is gender neutral. No, I wouldn't say 'a guy' for a woman, but it's idiom and context. Ultimately that's how people use the word so it includes women.

'Hey Team' on the other hand makes my skin twitch slightly. It's got that horrible forced friendliness/ business bullshit feel.

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