Page 3 | Phony Happy Couples

JayJa · 2024-02-26T11:00:03+00:00

Doesn't it seem like the couples who *constantly* promote what fantastic relationships they have to everyone else online are actually the ones in the worst relationships? I know of at least 5 couples, who have some of the most toxic or downright depressing relationships behind closed doors but it's all smiles and sunshine on their social media. Surely happy couples don't need to shout it from the rooftops about how happy they are as they have nothing to prove to anyone. Whereas, the unhappy people seem to try and convince not only themselves but others that everything is perfect, almost like a mantra with daily/weekly updates. It goes without saying I believe these types are in the minority but it highlights a bigger problem at large about how obsessed people have become with how they are perceived online not only in terms of relationships, but wealth and success etc. Have we become a society of narcissists or has social media just given the narcissists a platform to preach from?

ComtesseDeSpair · 26/02/2024 11:35

JayJa · 26/02/2024 11:28

I don't particularly care about it as it doesn't affect my everyday life. I have made the observation that it is becoming increasingly more common and I do wonder about the potential wider implications on regular and younger people being constantly exposed to a falsified perfect version of reality.

I too have a very close friend who does this, she will vent to me about leaving her husband for hours on end and post a picture of them smiling together that evening.

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I think young people are actually a lot more switched on when it comes to social media than many older people are and give them credit for: there are thousands of younger influencers, TikTokers, YouTubers etc who post videos and reels about “social media versus reality” and highlighting how often what they post isn’t always a hundred percent what’s really going on, in terms of perfect children, tidy house, mental health, posed selfies, travel photos, hair and makeup etc. Younger influencers actually appear to be a lot more open and genuine about it. And young people will be just as aware as you are that it isn’t reality if their friends are telling them one thing about their relationship and then posting another.

Original poster

JayJa · 26/02/2024 11:30

WhateverMate · 26/02/2024 11:23

I think SM brings out the worst in many different types of people.

Those who want to convince others their life is much better than it is.

Those who have great lives but want to rub it into others.

Those who are sick with jealousy and end up ruining their own lives, by following others on SM and constantly comparing.

Those who aren't happy with their lives/looks/careers so spend all their time posting photos and details of their DC's lives, so they can get 'admiration' through them, whilst totally invading their privacy.

Somewhere in between is the average people who just like a quick nose on SM and are mostly happy for everyone else.

I totally agree.

OP posts:

Original poster

JayJa · 26/02/2024 11:28

Nofilteritwonthelp · 26/02/2024 11:20

I find it more weird that other people care about it tbh. I have one friend like this, it doesn't bother me I just feel a bit sorry for her and make sure I'm there for her if and when she needs it 🤷🏼‍♀️

I don't particularly care about it as it doesn't affect my everyday life. I have made the observation that it is becoming increasingly more common and I do wonder about the potential wider implications on regular and younger people being constantly exposed to a falsified perfect version of reality.

I too have a very close friend who does this, she will vent to me about leaving her husband for hours on end and post a picture of them smiling together that evening.

OP posts:

KissMyArt · 26/02/2024 11:27

ComtesseDeSpair · 26/02/2024 11:22

I’m just as happy, wealthy and successful as I appear online tbh. So no, I don’t assume that other people must be lying or compensating for crap in their actual lives. I can’t say I really put too much thought into people’s social media. It’s just fluff for fun, it doesn’t really affect me what people are doing on it, I just scroll on by if it doesn’t strike me as genuine.

Edited

This is a very healthy attitude 👍

WhateverMate · 26/02/2024 11:23

I think SM brings out the worst in many different types of people.

Those who want to convince others their life is much better than it is.

Those who have great lives but want to rub it into others.

Those who are sick with jealousy and end up ruining their own lives, by following others on SM and constantly comparing.

Those who aren't happy with their lives/looks/careers so spend all their time posting photos and details of their DC's lives, so they can get 'admiration' through them, whilst totally invading their privacy.

Somewhere in between is the average people who just like a quick nose on SM and are mostly happy for everyone else.

ComtesseDeSpair · 26/02/2024 11:22

I’m just as happy, wealthy and successful as I appear online tbh. So no, I don’t assume that other people must be lying or compensating for crap in their actual lives. I can’t say I really put too much thought into people’s social media. It’s just fluff for fun, it doesn’t really affect me what people are doing on it, I just scroll on by if it doesn’t strike me as genuine.

Rangelife · 26/02/2024 11:22

I have actually stopped posting about me and DH online now because I felt a bit like our happiness could be read as being smug. But then someone asked if we are still together because I never post about him haha, we've only been married 8 months!

Social media is about 1% of people's lives at most. Whether they are happy or not, using SM as a measure is nonsense.

Nofilteritwonthelp · 26/02/2024 11:20

I find it more weird that other people care about it tbh. I have one friend like this, it doesn't bother me I just feel a bit sorry for her and make sure I'm there for her if and when she needs it 🤷🏼‍♀️

KissMyArt · 26/02/2024 11:19

Yes and no I'd say.

I know a few couples who are all lovey dovey on FB and they have awful relationships.

Equally I know a few who are the same except they have great relationships, and they just like to overshare on SM 🤷‍♂️

I wouldn't make any assumptions.

fourelementary · 26/02/2024 11:18

Yup. A lovely friend of mine was posting about her “soul mate” of a husband just weeks before they split and she told us all the truth about her shitshow of a marriage. Sadly she is now with another complete asshole who is abusive and mentally unwell, yet the SM posts continue, making them out to be couple of the year. #blessed

Who are they trying to convince???

JamSandle · 26/02/2024 11:16

One of the reasons I came off FB and Insta. I hate phonies.

Original poster

JayJa · 26/02/2024 11:15

LauritaEvita · 26/02/2024 11:09

Yes- I know of a few couples who live together who ‘talk’ to each other on Facebook for all to see. It’s really strange.

So the wife will tag the husband in a post linking to a hotel, saying ‘can’t wait to go here with you babe’ and husband will reply ‘me too. So excited!’. This will be at a time when they’re both at home so presumably are sitting next to each other but want their conversation to be public.

I worry about the sense of people bringing up
the next generation of kids!

Absolutely this!

They are more bothered about communicating with each other in way that others can see rather than actually talking to the person sat next to them on the sofa.

OP posts:

LauritaEvita · 26/02/2024 11:09

Yes- I know of a few couples who live together who ‘talk’ to each other on Facebook for all to see. It’s really strange.

So the wife will tag the husband in a post linking to a hotel, saying ‘can’t wait to go here with you babe’ and husband will reply ‘me too. So excited!’. This will be at a time when they’re both at home so presumably are sitting next to each other but want their conversation to be public.

I worry about the sense of people bringing up
the next generation of kids!