Triggered / Resilience / Decline

Nah @ChiefEverythingOfficer , I'm not buying it but.....giving you the benefit of the doubt...... can I just confirm that some people do need a trigger warning - why are you so anxious to prevent another person from being comfortable and feeling safe?

I’m always surprised by how many emetephobes are on here.
Nobody likes sick

I'm so sick of this type of ignorance too.

Emetophobia isn't about "not liking sick". It's about a deep rooted fear usually based on a past trauma (in my case a childhood experience with a very unwell relative). It is fear to the point of hyperventilating if a person anywhere in the same vicinity as you begins to look even slightly pale. It's an inability to walk through a theme park in case you see anyone vomiting after being on a ride. It's crossing the road to avoid a vague looking pile of something on the pavement that might be vomit, even if theres loads of room to avoid it. It's panic to the point of bleaching your own hands if anyone at work or your child's school / nursery mentions "sickness bug". Its breaking your heart crying and hyperventilating from the next room while your partner helps your young vomiting child because being near them and comforting them yourself is beyond terrifying and you're frozen to the spot. It's (in my case on one occasion) attempting to get out of a moving car when a child vomited in it on the back seat - that fear response override my rational brain. The last incident was what made me realise I needed to access therapy.

That's emetophobia - it's driven by trauma, fear and panic. It's not just "not liking" sick. 🙄

Spot on - pretty much came here to say this!

People living in extreme poverty and war need extensive therapy to recover if they ever manage to escape those situations. They absolutely are triggered while in them but have no choice but to carry on (in some fashion). Imagine you were brutally raped last year and suffered flashbacks, wouldn’t you appreciate a warning before coming across something similar in Eastenders.
Ffs, if you had a childhood punctuated by domestic violence you might want to avoid that on tv.

I wouldn’t say she is the rude one on this thread 🤣

@Octavia64 you are just plain rude

Doing their best isn't comparable to anyone else either. If one person can only just make it through the day and that's their best, that's where they are, they can't magic up resilience just because someone else in the same situation can do more. Everyone has a path , they're not all the same.

I grew up in a poor, abusive home. I don’t actually get triggered about it.
I was in an abusive relationship as an adult and I have been triggered from that.At the time your so focused on survival that you don’t recognise the trauma that has occurred. Once your safe and to finally exit the constant fight or flight survival mode is when it starts to dawn on you that your not okay. it wasn’t feeling ‘sad’. In reality trigger warnings don’t work for me because what has triggered me in past isn’t tv, books. It’s mundane stuff that is quite personal to me. It’s things that my brain recognises as a threat because it reminds me of my ex.

It does appear that trigger warnings don’t work for people. However there are definitely times when you might decide to steer clear of certain content and that’s okay. Constantly avoiding difficult situations, however probably does more harm then good long term.

It depends on what you call resilience. I've been told so many times in the past my Sen children need to be more resilient. They're the most resilient people I know! People just assume that everything can be overcome with a 'bit of resilience' and frankly, it can't. Take your example of people in war zones, many if not all probably have ptsd, the resilience is doing their best despite that, not avoiding getting it by being resilient.

“The difference is that I am resilient enough not to need conversational warnings.”

You might be confusing resilient with healed.

I don’t think trigger warnings have anything to do with resilience. If you’re in a PTSD condition severe enough that your trauma response can be triggered, then you’re already past the point when resilience will help.

Resilience is something else - it’s a quality which would have made the person who underwent trauma less likely to experience it with post traumatic stress - it comes much earlier in this process. Trigger warnings are for when we’re already waaaaaay past resilience.

Are you resilient or have you just internalised your trauma? Either way, you don’t get a medal for it. Just because you deal with something in a certain way doesn’t mean others should do and it’s nothing to do with resilience. Like I said before, trigger warnings do no harm to those who don’t need them.

I agree with you in some parts op. I do think there is a current culture where people expect others to tip toe around them which is very self centred, and instead of trying to find ways to overcome their fears and anxieties, they expect the world to adjust for them. But the world is a horrible and unpredictable place and that won’t happen. I had terrible anxiety myself a few years back and was borderline agoraphobic, but I forced myself to face up to it, which did mean putting myself in horrible situations and feeling like shit, but eventually it worked and life started to feel easier. There needs to be some self management as well, like if you’ve just been through a miscarriage is a website where the majority of posters will be mums, and will be taking about children really for you? It would be far better to have a break than to accidentally stumble on a post you might find upsetting.
I’m not totally compassionless though, in real life I know what my friends and family are going through and would steer clear of topics I know could upset them.

So people only deserve sympathy if they are 'nice' and 'kind'?
And because you OP don't have physical consequences of your own traumatic experience, those who do suffer them should just shut up because it's their own fault and d they should be more 'resilient'?

Gotcha.

(For clarity - I'm in no way triggered by your thread, but I have enough basic humanity to understand that different people react differently to traumatic events and it is not in any way their fault if they do suffer involuntary physical or mental health effects)

Sorry you have had it tough, but frankly it's your problem to deal with.

Well aren't you a peach. Good of you to start showing your true colours before the end of page one though.

I'm an emetephobe and it's not about "not liking sick". It about avoiding specific foods in case they make you sick, checking restaurant hygiene ratings before eating there and pre-screening the menu so you can choose low risk foods, it's about binning any food that might be 'off' or that looks or smells unusual in case it's gone 'off', it's about days of anxiety when there's a sick bug going around and symptom-watching in case you have it, it's not wanting to travel because the only thing more panic inducing than vomiting is the potential of vomiting somewhere away from home.

My fear of vomiting is linked to PTSD too.

Very well put and trigger warnings help with this.

By providing trigger warnings, you're giving people a heads up about the content and they can then choose whether or not to proceed with full knowledge of what they're going to encounter.

Well said. I honestly think those who think exposing people with PTSD to trauma triggers will magically make them resilient are guilty of “tabloidthink” and believe the world is black and white, that there is one true common sense, and it’s “woke” or broke. Single-threaded thinking patterns for people with little empathy and no emotional intelligence.

Ok, I'll bite.

In some people who have been exposed to traumatic situations, when those memories are triggered they have what are called non-epileptic seizures.

www.sth.nhs.uk/clientfiles/File/pd3922_NonEpilepticSeizures.pdf

So this looks like an epileptic seizure - they lose consciousness, fall to the ground, shake about a bit, wet and shit themselves.

So some people who have been raped, or abused, or in a traumatic situation, if they are triggered they will do that. In a public place.

Why the actual fuck would you not want people to be able to stop that? It's fucking embarrassing when you lose consciousness in a public place and come to to find everyone staring at you and that an ambulance has been called.

Yes, I've been abused. Yes, trigger warnings are helpful for me. FUCK off with this resilience shit until you have learnt some basic fucking humanity.

I don't think trigger warnings are needed if the thread title is clear, like in the miscarriage example posted above. Otherwise, they're a handy shorthand for warning people who don't want to read a thread about various upsetting things, who might otherwise have clicked on it.

Maybe it’s always been there but now society makes a bit more room for it? Instead of insisting we all conform to exact types. I think it’s better to be able to say when things are bad. Because one person hasn’t experienced a thing, doesn’t make it untrue.

I've actually only come across trigger warning on MN - never seen one elsewhere. I dont think they reduce resilience because the nature of some thread titles is you dont know its about child death, rape etc til you opened it. There are lots of reasons you might not want to engage with that topic at any point and can avoid them.

I also dont think resilience is some inner core streghth thats a constant state of being. It about the support and strategies you have in place to bounce back from a given difficulty. I am resilient to redundancy because i have insurance, savings and my partner earns too. I am not resilient to other things and some things i might be resilient to one day but not another.

😂
I’m always surprised by how many emetephobes are on here.
Nobody likes sick 🤷🏼‍♀️