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Original poster

Being called by wrong name…

55 replies

IsawwhatIsaw · 04/02/2024 20:30

Now this maybe sounds a bit petty, but still..
I’ve been going to the same exercise class for many years. Its a small group and I enjoy going.
The issue is the instructor persists in calling me by the wrong name, instead calling me the name of someone else in the class. I’ve got a very ordinary name, not difficult to pronounce. And she doesn’t misname anyone else, it’s only ever really me!
I’ve quietly corrected her most times, but it keeps on happening , seems to be even worse lately. She doesn’t really apologise, once telling me I look like the other person!
But it’s getting annoying , especially as when I’m lying down, I’ve no idea if she means to talk to me or not. I’m actually thinking of joining another class now.

OP posts:
sharptoothlemonshark · 04/02/2024 22:32

with the best will in the world, some people are just no good at names.

Chickenkeev · 04/02/2024 22:30

It's really not petty of you at all. And she's nasty. It's basic to call someone by their name ffs. I would be very angry about that tbh.

Original poster
IsawwhatIsaw · 04/02/2024 21:59

Thanks for all the replies, views and suggestions. As I said, I don’t think it’s deliberate, but it’s persistent and she’s not coming across as bothered about it.
I’ve just spent a short while online, found another class locally and emailed the teacher. Will see how that goes….

OP posts:
Whoopaday · 04/02/2024 21:35

CoffeeBeansGalore · 04/02/2024 21:13

Wear a bright t shirt with your name on it in big bold print?

Oh you have to do this!

GrannyAchingsShepherdsHut · 04/02/2024 21:34

I'd stop correcting her quietly, and do it at a normal speaking voice.

Not pissed off (if you can manage it!) but just normal volume so everyone can hear.

If that doesn't work, I'd probably get a bit arsey and say something like, 'Nope, I'm still Caroline!'

Or call her Mildred at every opportunity. Unless her name is Mildred, in which case call her Daphne.

BobbyBiscuits · 04/02/2024 21:27

That is odd and a bit annoying. Surely she must know the names of people if they are her paying customers? I think you should be firm next time she does it say. 'Why do you never know my name, I've been coming here for x months/years?' Its 'ISAW', write it down if you have to!' You can say it in a semi jokey way but if others hear she will be embarassed into remembering it (or even simply noting it down) hopefully. It's the sort of thing you expect in a high turnover environment like if you were in hospital you don't remember all the nurses names, but not in a professional class from the teacher.

Original poster
IsawwhatIsaw · 04/02/2024 21:26

@DojaPhat - nothing really that different, I’m similar age to the others, similar build. Last week there were 6 of us, she still called me by the wrong name 3 times.

OP posts:
Original poster
IsawwhatIsaw · 04/02/2024 21:23

@sbhydrogen - yes, it’s exactly that.
she doesn’t seem apologetic, it’s almost like some sort of joke to her.

OP posts:
DojaPhat · 04/02/2024 21:22

Is there anything about you that distinguishes you as different from others in the class? You say it's a small group so is there anything about you that is different from anyone else, apart from your name, of course.

sbhydrogen · 04/02/2024 21:20

But she doesn’t seem bothered when I correct her

See this is the bit that stands out the most to me. I'd have a word with her and tell her to get your name right or you'll leave. It's been years.

Original poster
IsawwhatIsaw · 04/02/2024 21:18

@CoffeeBeansGalore , doing that had actually crossed my mind.. !

OP posts:
notmyrealuserna · 04/02/2024 21:17

I'd just go 'it's Jane remember!' Everytime she will soon stop if you call her out. Or move classes.

CoffeeBeansGalore · 04/02/2024 21:13

Wear a bright t shirt with your name on it in big bold print?

Original poster
IsawwhatIsaw · 04/02/2024 21:08

i don’t think it’s deliberate. But she doesn’t seem bothered when I correct her. And to be told it’s because I’m sitting near someone with that name, or I look like them- when actually we really aren’t alike at all- feels rude really.
And I’ve been going to her class for several years

OP posts:
SheSaidHummingbird · 04/02/2024 21:07

If you suspect it's deliberate, call her out on it, in front of the class, every time she does it.

martinisforeveryone · 04/02/2024 21:04

There's a case for sitting bolt upright, or whatever the situation and holding up your hand saying loudly ' Excuse me for just a moment. My name is ---. Thank you' and then lie back down again.

I'd find it annoying too.

DistinguishedSocialCommenator · 04/02/2024 21:04

IsawwhatIsaw · 04/02/2024 21:02

@Sofabum - yes I wondered that, but it’s only me she misnames.
@distinguishedsocialcommenator- well at first I did ignore it. But I suppose I’m getting fed up now.

Fair enough. Then have a quiet, polite word with them, trust me it will do the trick. However, if they are nice/polite/genuine, please do not forget people do at times just forget names and for some reason call certain people by the wrong name but no malice is involved.

I call our son by one of grandson's name many times

lemonmeringueno3 · 04/02/2024 21:04

I'm half way through the school year and still calling some kids by the wrong name.

I call my dog by my daughter's name and vice versa.

I really doubt it's intentional although can see how it's annoying. I think I'd hang back after a session to tell her it's really getting to you now and decide what to do based on her reaction - if she's mortified and apologetic, I'd be forgiving.

Original poster
IsawwhatIsaw · 04/02/2024 21:02

@Sofabum - yes I wondered that, but it’s only me she misnames.
@distinguishedsocialcommenator- well at first I did ignore it. But I suppose I’m getting fed up now.

OP posts:
afkonholidaynearleek · 04/02/2024 21:00

"For the last bloody time, it's IsawwhatIsaw!"

Niegenug · 04/02/2024 21:00

Every single time, tell her loudly in front of everyone, "As I've told you before, my name isn't xxxxxx, it's xxxxx". Every single time. When she feels embarrassed enough, then she will stop.

MargaretThursday · 04/02/2024 20:59

I have a sort of mental block with names and I can see me doing that even with trying to make a huge effort to remember. Once I've got the wrong name into my head then it sticks.

I'd remember your birthday though. I can remember dates and all sorts of other useless info but names just don't work for me. I do apologise and try and avoid using them, but sometimes you have to.

DistinguishedSocialCommenator · 04/02/2024 20:57

people called me by the wrong name many times - did not bother me as they were polite/etc as well as I do it - we are all different, its no big deal unless they are doing it willfuly and in your case its not the case

Sofabum · 04/02/2024 20:57

Does she have face blindness? I have a colleague who does and she genuinely cannot recognise faces and if people do look similar finds them very difficult to tell apart.

eggbot · 04/02/2024 20:56

Call them the wrong name