Suspected autism and flying

If you book special assistance he and one other can go through a quieter security check. They can get a bit arsey if the whole family want to go through.

We've never had a problem with this in the UK, but coming home at overseas airports they don't like it.

You do not need a diagnosis to book special assistance.

In the U.K. most airports understand autism.

If you book special assistance he and one other can go through a quieter security check. They can get a bit arsey if the whole family want to go through.

Sunflower lanyard and ear defenders are also a good idea.

When we've flown with ND kids, the airports have been ok with an adult wearing the lanyard on behalf of the child- it flags up that the group need assistance. Asking for assistance can mean skipping the queues if the childs not able to queue, I would also suggest you take a buggy with you even if you don't normally use one as it makes a good 'hiding space' for the child when in the airport. Airlines usually have a policy of one free buggy or car seat per child ticket, so our buggies have always been included as a result.

Social stories are your friend here. Be really clear about what will happen and in what order. Within the story write down what the options are if they start feeling overwhelmed.
E.g - If I don't like the noises I can wear my ear defenders.
Also some kind of written or visuals schedule that they use to check off each stage if the process to give them a sense of control.
Sunflower lanyard is a good idea. Some airports have sensory rooms - I know Manchester does.

They don't have to wear the lanyard.. you can wear it for them.. or tie it onto their backpack or something.
Yes ear defenders.. we get on the plane first and settled into our seats.. Grandson gets on his ipad..
Also do NOT be bothered about other passengers.. especially if they throw negative comments etc.
Some are ignorant and best ignored.. choose special assistance because then you will be in a corner of the airport with a few others away from all the other passengers.. much quieter.. you won't be in any queues..
Contact the airline or travel company and book special assistance.
Well worth it..

If he will focus on a tablet, or device like a Nintendo switch, bring it and let him use it the entire time. Snacks and drinks at the ready. If you are concerned about running off and have an iPhone, clip an air tag on him. An airport will have plenty of people to help.

Special assistance will get you through security quicker. They can also collect you at the plane when you land back home and get you to front of passport control queue. Your airline will have something on their website about it.
When you land in other countries it can be different. If going to Spain look at arena.es website though we have found sometimes it takes longer to get through as they make you wait.
Agree with others that ear defenders distractions snacks etc help

at some airports you can pay to go through fast track security and fast track passport control, which will cut out some queues.
maybe some noise cancelling headphones, also iPad with games and favourite shows.
paying to sit at the front of the plane lets you get off quickly, and also access the loo quickly.
these are all things I do with my NT children - it just speeds up the journey.

Make sure you have lots of distractions. I bring a carry in just for my DS. Fill it with snacks so they don't get hungry, lots of things to do - colouring, stickers, iPad (and a battery pack so iPad doesn't run out!!!) change of clothes as my DS gets upset if he gets something down him. Literally think of anything that could happen and what could make things better.

Have you thought of having a day out at the airport? Lunch in a cafe there? It might help with what to expect in a very crowded airport.

With all due respect, that’s not helpful. Autism is about individual needs, so just because your daughter was ok doesn’t necessarily mean the OP’s child will be. This is why we need to stop with ‘functioning’ labels, needs vary regardless of overall delays.

As other have said, pre plan and preempt as much as possible.

I have a similar masker. We've travelled since he was a few months old.
This was our normal till he got a bit older and could find different ways.
He would be extremely "well behaved" during the whole airport/ check-in/ flight part of the process.
We would establish a "rule" to attempt sleeping on flight, if possible. This started because of his age when he first flew but it also helped us later because it mitigated slightly the energy and stress he would go through while masking through the parts that he found difficult.
Arriving at destination and going through passport control was usually challenging, especially after the whole flight, as was waiting for luggage, but nowadays families are usually prioritised.
We would expect some sort of meltdown especially if specific unforeseen events had occurred ( think delays/ queues) as soon as we were alone in the family, out of sight of others.
We found that a clear run through of all steps in the process of flying was helpful， including possible setbacks, so he knew exactly what parts came next. We would talk about the fact that he would probably feel overwhelmed at some point and that sleeping would help with this to some extent.
This was years ago now, so we didn't have the stuff there is now, but had it been now we would have looked up everything on line beforehand to show exactly what would be happening.
I never doubted however that he wouldn't get on the plane or have a meltdown mid flight because he'd been flying since he was a couple of months old .I think that had that been a possibility I might have booked a course at the airport prior to flying. We live abroad so it was essential for us.

What support do you think you need? My dd has autism, was barely verbal at 5, yet she flew 3 times a year at least without issue, she could name every airline by logo by 6!

I was lucky with mine that aviation was his special interest, he couldn't get on the plane quick enough. I still have vivid recollections of him age 7 travelling to Cairo sat next to an Egyptian gentleman. He was telling him all about the type of plane we were on, and how it had been grounded in the past due to explosive decompression, and he hoped they'd changed the rivets that caused the problem on this particular plane. By the time I clocked what was going on and stopped him the poor guy was a little pale.
I'm not sure there's a huge amount you can do to prepare him, most plane programmes involve them falling out of the sky. Maybe one of the avgeek YouTubers if he's into that sort of thing (Noel Philips or Josh Cahill) would get him interested. You could get express security and book a lounge to make the airport experience a bit less stressful.

Take some decent noise cancelling headphones - it’ll drown out the noise of the plane and means other passenger won’t have to listen to the iPad too. Win win!

We've never been asked for proof when booking special assistance - you can go through the fast track queue and (if necessary, though it's probably not best) board first (boarding last is better as more running around).

Beware coming back home. We have found Manchester and Liverpool were both fine but France/Spain not helpful at all - they only understand people needing wheelchairs, not people needing space, quiet and lack of queues, and made us wait ages to be escorted through security and even then wouldn't let all 4 of us go through fast track.

I also highly recommend going to a plane visit (airfield, half-a-plane, or similar) to get your DC familiar with the inside of the plane.

Lots of good advice already, I Wouldn’t worry about not having a diagnosis, Ime you don’t need one, just contact the airline/airport services and explain your concerns. I flew in the summer with a teenager with suspected ASD but no diagnosis. They got very stressed at the amount of people waiting to board the plane. I explained to staff and they were more than happy to let us board before anyone else and took us to a quieter area. We found ear defenders to be invaluable. I think it may be an idea to try and start preparing your son, videos, books, maybe a visit to the airport etc? For what it’s worth my other teenager with diagnosed ASD refuses to come on holiday with us and now the one that came in the summer doesn’t want to go this year. They are happier at home.

No harm in asking for special assistance if you think it'll help. You may or may not get it. We booked it last time but didn't use it. There were a load of people waiting for it in a special area, not enough seats for them all, and DS was happier in the queue which was more predictable and made more sense to him.

We take some sort of tech with a step counter and get him interested in how many he's done. When we've been delayed in queues we have set him up doing circuits alongside the queue and updating us on his step count. Wearing a heavy rucksack is good for regulation too. Ear defenders. Lanyard as PPs have said, and your own "vibe" makes a huge difference.

I would highly recommend flying from a small airport if possible, but all in all we've found it fine. Once you've done it once it becomes part of the new holiday routine, with all the positive associations that brings.

Last one (sorry, I'm typing as it all occurs to me), I try and prep myself- if I'm a bag of nerves then it'll just feed DD's anxiety. I try not to be too excited either (that pumped up energy can be a bit much for her as well). I do say to her "I think it will feel very fast when the plane takes off" "the pilot will keep us very safe" I find that she then parrots these phrases back, it helps her put words to her experiences.

When we go on holiday I always prepare by showing DS videos of the airport and plane so they can see what it will be like, explain the process for security etc and generally prepare them in advance for what to expect so they have an idea before they get to airport. I also usually do the same for any hotels or places we are staying. You could also do a printed booklet with pictures as a visual guide

Oh I also bring a packed lunch/snack so that she can see we'll have at least 1 familiar food item with us as well (she gets very anxious not knowing what she'll eat/drink)

My DD is 17 now .. high functioning autism.

Distraction is good - headphones and tablet, let them choose & pack a bag for the flight.. books, drawing etc.. and snacks. Walking down the plane, when you are onboard (so they don’t feel trapped).. a list of things to spot at the airport.

My DD wears ear defenders for the noise of the crowd in the airport and, prior to travel, we watch a social story on YouTube or a CBeebies type episode where the character gets a bus/train/airplane (whatever relates to what we'll be doing). Other than that, I think the lanyard will be useful as she gets older (for now, I don't think she'd like the feel of it around her neck).

It may also be worth looking if you can pick up a SN buggy second hand. Will be helpful in the airport and probably when away

Have you considered paying for an airport lounge? It would be quieter and not so crowded whilst waiting for boarding.