If you could scream one thing in your DH's face, one sentence, what would it be? Mine, as an example, was 'YOU DON'T LISTEN TO ME!!!', but yours likely is different... if you can answer it, if you can get right down to this root of anger, you can deal with it.
The fury you felt is from your childhood, probably. You will have spent your childhood being told/shown that your feelings come second to something. Like an ill parent, an addict parent, fighting parents, demanding sibling... something systematic in your childhood life, that made you uncomfortable/unhappy, but you couldn't express your feelings or have them nurtured, because 'the thing' was always more important.
Does that make any sense, or am I fully barking up the wrong tree?
You're allowed to lose your shit. It's never great behaviour from anybody when they do, but it's not a major tragedy. Use it as an example to your teenager that when you fuck up, you apologise, by identifying the hurt person's feelings and expressing regret, and then promising an effort never to do it again. Your teenager will follow your example, and thus, not carry a bunch of guilt around for every mistake they make, all their life. You can turn this into something really valuable.
How is your husband responding, now? What's been said between you, since 'the event'?
And, lastly: 
You are very very far from being the only person who has done this!