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Original poster

Mortifying situation at work, how to handle it?

155 replies

CheeseCrackers45 · 21/12/2023 22:47

Hi all. Already EXTREMELY embarrassed and want advice/WWYD.

So, I was on my break at work today and am on my period. Went to the bathroom, changed my pad, wrapped the used one in a bag and put it on the bin in preparation to put it in, but was in such a rush that I completely forgot to. Went back to work and suddenly remembered after about 15 minutes, but before I had a chance to excuse myself to put it in the bin, I overheard a colleague reporting to our manager that she'd found a used sanitary towel in the bathroom! I then overheard her talking and laughing about it with other colleagues, making fun of the thickness of the pad and how it reminded her of a nappy etc (I have endo so have really really heavy periods that only very big pads are able to handle).

I then overheard two managers talking about how they're going to hold a meeting with all the staff about keeping the bathrooms tidy/using facilities provided tomorrow.

I am absolutely mortified and embarrassed. I know I should have remembered to put it in the bin and nobody else should have to see it, but it was a genuine slip of memory.

Nobody has any idea that it was me (nobody saw me enter or leave the bathroom and nobody else was in there) but I'm terrified they'll be able to check CCTV in the hallway etc. I'm thinking of not saying anything and feigning ignorance when it's brought up but I'm so worried that I'll give myself away and thinking of discretely taking my manager aside and admitting it was me but that it was a genuine mistake and apologising profusely. However, my manager is a man and I'm not sure how understanding he would be.

Thankfully we finish for Christmas break tomorrow so hopefully it'll all be forgotten by the time we come back 😅

YABU - Come clean
YANBU - Don't say anything

OP posts:
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ALongHardWinter · 22/12/2023 18:49

Good grief! They were talking and laughing about it with other colleagues? You'd think that these women had never had a period!

ValerieMoore · 22/12/2023 18:43

You should frame one of the women who laughed at you

laclochette · 22/12/2023 18:31

They should be ashamed for being so indiscrete and immature, not you!

Original poster
CheeseCrackers45 · 22/12/2023 17:35

@nmchg been at work since 2 (I work evenings) and they've literally not mentioned it at all yet! I'm paranoid thinking everyone is looking at me knowing I did it, even though that's obviously not true 😂

OP posts:
nmchg · 22/12/2023 16:36

How did it go today OP?

Original poster
CheeseCrackers45 · 22/12/2023 11:32

@Scalottia oh I agree, that's why I'm so mortified! I was just in a rush and completely forgot. Good lesson to check the bathroom in future!

OP posts:
Delatron · 22/12/2023 11:29

Say nothing. Don’t be embarrassed or look embarrassed. Nod along when they are discussing bathroom cleanliness. Then forget all about it.

Mangotango39 · 22/12/2023 10:58

@Scalottia also - I was only young at the time (first job!) and this was an over 40s woman.

Mangotango39 · 22/12/2023 10:57

@Scalottia we arnt all perfect unfortunately - over the top reactions to embarrass people arnt on!!!

As I said I am extremely light. It must have been a one small amount of blood on a wet tissue in the bowl that had tried to flush!

Scalottia · 22/12/2023 10:29

Mangotango39 · 22/12/2023 07:16

Clearly a mistake

Once on my period, I flushed the toilet but they were very old (old factory) and it musnt have fully flushed ,common thing there!
A woman went in after me and knew it was me before - I was at the sink.

She then loudly shouted some women were disgusting as there was some blood in the toilet and bloody tissue - I am not even heavy so it can't have been much!

When I went back later that day she had printed and LAMINATED a sign about flushing properly. Bloody ridiculous - pun intended.

Edited

Mistakes happen, but maybe check the toilet before you leave. No-one wants to see other people's blood, poo, wee etc.

Just like no-one wants to see somebody's used pad sitting out in the open (in a bag or not, it's still gross). Or maybe I am easily disgusted.

Original poster
CheeseCrackers45 · 22/12/2023 08:47

@puddypud i have no clue. I've seen a lot of threads recently that derail into troll hunting, picking on the slightest little detail to discredit OP. Just amuses me that some are saying it couldn't possibly be true because no woman is that bitchy 😂 Clearly they've worked with some lovely people because a few of my colleagues would 100% be that bitchy.

OP posts:
puddypud · 22/12/2023 08:35

Loads of places provide small paper bags for sanitary products. Not sure why people have picked up on that to try and discredit you OP.

Carblover · 22/12/2023 08:01

PyongyangKipperbang · 22/12/2023 01:31

Christ what is wrong with people?!

"This has never happened to me therefore this must be made up!"

To the troll hunters, be fucking grateful that you have never worked anywhere this regimented. It happens. The reason that your big important jobs make so much money is because hundreds of thousands of people are working at the shitty end.....packing boxes, picking orders, driving the delivery van that you are kicking off about being 10 minutes late......... Some places really do time loo breaks, there was an big issue in a distribution centre near where I live because several women were disciplined for taking too long when they where menstruating so it took longer and "quick piss and out". I seem to recall that Amazon had (has, not sure) a similar system where if you dont pick enough orders then you are disciplined but it didnt take into account that toilet breaks take longer with digestive issues, periods etc. If it wasnt Amazon it was another big company.

Be fucking grateful that your online Xmas orders are happening because some poor cow works at the other end of the line from you.

TÄ¥is

agentcooperinthewhitelodge · 22/12/2023 07:57

Say nothing and stay grey rock and stoic about it. It's a shame your colleagues are so nasty though- they might find when they go through peri menopause that karma gives them a good old slapping.

Also, pretty sure that period shaming is actually discriminatory (maybe not legally but from a social perspective it surely must be). It was a mistake- it's not like you regularly do it. Go to work with your head held high- I'd far rather have made your mistake than have the personality of a rancid old turd like your colleague.

Original poster
CheeseCrackers45 · 22/12/2023 07:54

@Snowdogsmitten thank you. The bins I'm talking about, you can't open them with the pedal at the bottom when you're sitting on the toilet. And by the time I'd stood up to leave I'd forgotten!

OP posts:
Snowdogsmitten · 22/12/2023 07:50

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Sooooo bored of posters troll hunting and talking as though they are an authority on absolutely everything, in this case the opening mechanism of every sanitary bin ever produced.

readymealeater · 22/12/2023 07:33

she used to work in a care home and it reminded her of one of those big incontinence pads and giggled about it.

Horrible to think she also used to mock the elderly too, but I suppose it does happen - we read about stories of some awful people working in care homesm.

AnneValentine · 22/12/2023 07:23

This reply has been deleted

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Oh they be would. And do.

ChanelNo19EDT · 22/12/2023 07:20

say nothing, fgs, it was a sanitary towel not a bomb. I mean that kindly. Once in a former workplace the cistern was slow to refill and I needed to reflush but it wouldn't properly flush again, I ran back to my desk anyway. I'd flushed twice. An email came around to talk about the disgusting state of the toilets. I didn't feel ''shamed'', I felt what the hell is wrong with these fuckers. It was a customer facing role and I was trying not to be gone for too long, letting queues build up. I didn't think a bunch of women would be sending emails about some pink water in the toilet bowl. My god.

CoffeeCantata · 22/12/2023 07:18

OP, please try to put it behind you. You made a simple mistake - you didn't mean to do this and we've all done something similar in our lives - we just try to blank it out!

If you can, yes, just pretend you know nothing and get through the 'tell-off talk'.

Forget about it after that!

Speedygonzales78 · 22/12/2023 07:17

Don't say anything. It's a genuine mistake.
However the person who came in boasting how they'd reported it and laughing about it is the unreasonable one. Personally I'd have just popped it in the bin and got on with my day. She'd have a field day at my workplace with the things and state both the ladies and gents toilets have been found in!

Mangotango39 · 22/12/2023 07:16

Clearly a mistake

Once on my period, I flushed the toilet but they were very old (old factory) and it musnt have fully flushed ,common thing there!
A woman went in after me and knew it was me before - I was at the sink.

She then loudly shouted some women were disgusting as there was some blood in the toilet and bloody tissue - I am not even heavy so it can't have been much!

When I went back later that day she had printed and LAMINATED a sign about flushing properly. Bloody ridiculous - pun intended.

Ohwheretobegin · 22/12/2023 07:09

Even if they check the cctv, they won’t be able to prove it was you? Could’ve been the person before you, or after.

kimchio · 22/12/2023 07:01

Don't say anything and your colleague is a dick. These things can be handled with descretion

Original poster
CheeseCrackers45 · 22/12/2023 07:00

Thanks all. Yes, for everyone saying they can't believe women could be so bitchy, you've obviously worked in some nice places because they absolutely can be and are.

Absolutely dreading work today. I know in all likelihood it'll be a quick 'please keep the bathrooms tidy' meeting and forgotten by everyone else in a few minutes, but I'm still so mortified!

OP posts:
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