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AIBU?

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Original poster

To think he should pay?

57 replies

Snowange98 · 14/12/2023 00:45

I’ve been meeting up with my ex and talking things through but the other day we got into an argument. He recently had knee surgery and had metal plates in and has crutches to help get around. We were sat in my car and were arguing over something and I was staying calm but he loses his temper quickly. All of a sudden he banged his crutches into my windscreen and it caused quite a bad crack down the passenger side. I do have insurance that covers my windscreen but my excess is around £80 for this that I have to pay for a full new windscreen as it reduces my visibility and wouldn’t be legal to drive around with it like that. He’s refusing to pay or help towards this cost. Basically just told me on a text no won’t be paying. Aibu to think he should? I’m just so upset that this has happened.

OP posts:
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Gettingcolder · 14/12/2023 18:56

If you are going to claim on insurance anyway, your insurance company might try to make him pay. I would ask them what to do as they may tell you to report it as criminal damage. If the insurance company try to claim off him, it will be for a lot more than the £80 excess!

Tempnamechng · 14/12/2023 15:38

I would report it to the police. If his temper is that bad it needs logging - otherwise you have no evidence if anything else happens in the future.

jhy · 14/12/2023 15:36

He clearly does have a temper to hit the window screen that hard to cause a crack. Yes he should pay but if its hassle and he won't then you will obviously have to / go insurance route.

Hankunamatata · 14/12/2023 15:34

Ex boyfriend and take him to small claims to repair windscreen

FirstTimeTTC989 · 14/12/2023 15:18

Just block him and move on. Why are you still engaging with this horrible man?

MrsTerryPratchett · 14/12/2023 14:39

PossumintheHouse · 14/12/2023 01:14

It cost you £80 to learn what an utter arsehole this selfish, ill-tempered wanker is. Some people would say that’s a bargain.
Block him. STOP meeting him.

True. As long as you do learn from this OP. Bin the wanker off. He's dangerous and violent. And cheap.

WorriedMum231 · 14/12/2023 14:28

You’re definitely being unreasonable for having any contact with him what so ever. Personally, I would pay for the window and never talk to the violent idiot ever again.

Newestname002 · 14/12/2023 14:27

@Snowange98

I was staying calm but he loses his temper quickly. All of a sudden he banged his crutches into my windscreen and it caused quite a bad crack down the passenger side.

I wouldn't want someone this volatile in my life, taking out their frustrations and anger on me and my possessions.

He's an Ex for a reason surely - why invite such negativity back in your life? 🌹

youwouldthink · 14/12/2023 13:16

I'd pay the £80 and save the screenshot of the transaction as my screensaver in case I would ever be tempted to speak to this idiot again.

TeaGinandFags · 14/12/2023 13:05

Report to the police as this is exactly the type of violent behaviour they get paid to deal with. It is classic abusive behaviour and needs stopping NOW.

Will it get you your £80? Hard to say but it will tell him he doesn't get to throw a strop the minute he doesn't get his way.

And get the fuck away from him.

PegasusReturns · 14/12/2023 12:30

Report it to the police - if a stranger smashed your windscreen you would.

it won’t help you get your money back but I’d be very concerned this will escalate. Make it clear from the off you do not tolerate abuse.

Frasers · 14/12/2023 12:28

I really think it’s better to stop arguing over shit. He’s not going to pay. So you pay and block him.

rainbowsparkle28 · 14/12/2023 12:27

Report to police for criminal damage and pay for it and move on and avoid him like a barge pole - he sounds like an absolute arse. You are far better no contact or anything and him out of your life.

WaltzingWaters · 14/12/2023 12:26

Yea he should pay. Doubt he will. So just block him. Do not engage again. Ever. Next time it could be you he smashes.

mottytotty · 14/12/2023 12:26

He's a cunt. Do you have anything of his that you can keep?

Ohtobetwentytwo · 14/12/2023 12:22

I'd text him and say he has 24 hours to cough up or you be talking to the police about criminal damage. And follow through. I'd probably ask under one of those domestic abuse laws about him and stay the hell away from him.

IncompleteSenten · 14/12/2023 12:17

He should pay but clearly he's not going to.

Consider £80 the cost of truly learning there's no point trying to talk things through with him and confirmation that it really is best he stays an ex.

And let it be the last time he gets in your car.

Lamelie · 14/12/2023 12:15

I’d love to know his rationale.

WhatInTheAcasIsGoingOn · 14/12/2023 12:12

I'd report it to the police so you at least have a crime number for the insurers. I replaced a windscreen once due to road stone chips and forgot all about it until my renewal came up and it got bumped up because of the claim. It's annoying and whether you report him or not you'll still have all the extra costs but at least he'll have some shit on him too. 🤷

grumpycow1 · 14/12/2023 11:59

He should pay but the bigger issue is that you will now cut him off and never talk to him again, won’t you?! £80 is a small price to pay to learn that he is a violent twat who deserves never to be in your life again.

FictionalCharacter · 14/12/2023 11:58

Of course he should have paid, but he won't and you can't make him.
Hopefully you'll never again try to talk things through with an aggressive man who loses his temper violently and damages your property.

DelphiniumBlue · 14/12/2023 11:58

If it was an accident, and he cared about you, of course he would offer to pay. Which makes me think that it wasn't an accident, and that he doesn't care.
And that he's violent and actually wants to cause you upset and pain.
So hopefully you will see this as the massive warning sign it is and cut all contact.
And like an earlier poster said, consider changing your car to one he won't recognise.

Wishimaywishimight · 14/12/2023 11:56

Of course he should, you know that but it really doesn't sound like he's a decent sort who will.

Perhaps time to stop meeting up to "talk things through" - surely you don't want to reconcile with such a person?

Hellenika · 14/12/2023 11:56

Yes he should pay. If you have access to his car insurance info, you could have your insurance call his car insurance to file a claim that way. All you need is his Reg Plate number and the company he has insurance with.