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AIBU?

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Original poster

School trip

38 replies

user7556 · 11/12/2023 13:11

DS school wants to take the whole school on a trip in a couple of months. DS is in reception and he is autistic, he does have a 1:1 but the thought of him being gone a whole day makes me feel anxious and to be quite honest I don't know how he would cope with the whole experience.

AIBU for not wanting him to go? Can I say no that I don't want him to or perhaps school will already suggest that he doesn't attend anyway?

OP posts:
Guibhyl · 11/12/2023 13:34

Youcannotbeseriousreally · 11/12/2023 13:32

It makes YOU feel anxious. don’t limit your child’s experiences based on how YOU feel. If the school are happy to support then of course he should go.

Edited
Show quote history

This. It’s not about you.

Youcannotbeseriousreally · 11/12/2023 13:32

user7556 · 11/12/2023 13:15

@ExtraOnions I know what you mean. It just really makes me feel anxious though, I've no idea how he would manage or how they would manage with him in an unfamiliar place

It makes YOU feel anxious. don’t limit your child’s experiences based on how YOU feel. If the school are happy to support then of course he should go.

Sirzy · 11/12/2023 13:31

Talk to school but make it a conversation based on how to make it work if possible.

DramaLlama12 · 11/12/2023 13:29

I'm a 1:1 at a primary school .
The risk assessment would have been done and they do try to get the children to go with some adjustments if needed. Could you go? That would be sencos first question so the child has a 2:1 .
The last trip we went on I insisted another person came as I know tackling the roads and parts of the trip would have been tricky just having 1 person there. Are reigns an option if you or another member of staff can't go on the trip ? This was option 2 bevuse of the nature of the trip. Busy roads , running off etc
You can say you don't want the child to go that's option 3 , the child would either stay at school or you'd be expected to keep the child home.
There are some trips that some children absolutely get nothing from and there's nothing that they benefit from the trip but some sencos are all about including the child in every aspect
The last trip we went on he got nothing from but the next trip I think he would enjoy.

GrannyAchingsShepherdsHut · 11/12/2023 13:24

If you've really no idea how he would be with it, then I'd gently suggest you should let him go. He has a 121, they'll be with him, he may absolutely love it - and wouldn't that be amazing?

Is there any way you could be free that day? It might help your anxiety if you are able to go too, or even if there was a problem they could call you to come to him? Knowing that might help you be a bit more confident and in control that there's a plan to make it work?

But you should absolutely speak to his teacher and explain your worries and ask how they're planning to support him on the day.

Crunchymum · 11/12/2023 13:20

Are you able to go along as a parent volunteer? I know this isn't an option for everyone (nor will it work for everyone) but it's an idea?

SomersetBrie · 11/12/2023 13:18

Would he enjoy the trip if you were there with him?
If he would, then I would ask to go along.
I can understand your concerns as he is so little. You going along as well might help both of you for any future trips.

Smartiepants79 · 11/12/2023 13:18

I have taught many children with varying Sen from 4 up.
I can’t ever remember us not managing to take one of our kids safely on a trip. We’re all off to the panto soon. Several of ours are asd. They’re all coming and I expect them to all be fine with some support.

MinnieMountain · 11/12/2023 13:17

How do you know until you try? The children with SEN in DS’s year (5) have largely always gone on school day trips.

Smartiepants79 · 11/12/2023 13:15

You can say you don’t want him to go. They would expect you to keep him at home instead.
Have you discussed it with them? They will have to risk assess, issues regarding children who might struggle would be part of this. They should already have a plan. They may suggest he not attained but that’s not good practice. Can you go with him? That’s sometimes an option.

Original poster
user7556 · 11/12/2023 13:15

@ExtraOnions I know what you mean. It just really makes me feel anxious though, I've no idea how he would manage or how they would manage with him in an unfamiliar place

OP posts:
Mothership4two · 11/12/2023 13:15

Talk to his teacher and support worker about your anxiety about this trip.

ExtraOnions · 11/12/2023 13:14

Having ASD shouldn’t mean that he misses out on the nice things at school. He had a 1:2:1 .. trust them, and the school, to do thier job.

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