School trip

The school has to include him, it would be discriminatory to suggest he does not attend. They will have experience of this and there should be a risk assessment. If you can go then do, schools always really appreciate help on trips.

Because I didn't know that would be an option and I have a full time job so I cant always be 100% available, obviously try to be but not always the case. Where I can I want to give DS independence also, just makes me nervous as he's never done a school trip before

One of my children attends an ASN school where most of the children need extra support. Some on 2 adults to 1 child. They have risk assessments for each child and they go out on weekly excursions. They haven't lost a child yet. I would ask the school if they have risk assessed for your child so you feel more secure with him attending the trip.

might be an option I suppose that either me or DH can go with him

Why do you sound so wishy-washy about supporting your child in going on a school trip?

Me going to support my ND child (and her twin) was my first thought when an out of town Reception class trip came up. It didn't occur to me to say no to her going (despite her being a runner and unfamiliar, busy places being a massive trigger for her). I made sure I liaised with the school to ensure she could fully participate.

Do you not think though that they will know how to help him through the day? It sounds like a great thing! But obviously talk to them just remember that they know him and his capabilities too x

I would just talk to them. If you don't think your child will get much out of it, or won't be safe, then just tell the school that. If he's going to be unsafe or unhappy, they'd probably prefer he didn't go anyway.

You've just started at the school and your kid has SEN; my advice would be to communicate and build a good relationship - it may be helpful in the future.

My ds hasasdI worry about school trips too. Ds did trips since yr2 (none earlier due to covid) I've gone on two. One I couldn't go on but he did fine with his one to one.

It's well worth you talking to the school about how they will manage things. If they've not taken him off-site before then it would be useful for them to know how he might react; you're the ones with the expertise on that. The thing that jumps out at me here is that it may well make sense for them to take the buggy.

Worst case scenario - he hates it, they can't cope and they phone to ask you to collect him.

Best case scenario - he has a fab time and learns a little independence from you.

Even if the worst case scenario happens, you can work with the school so that they are more
prepared next time.

Honestly, I've taken Brownies away on overnights. You'd be amazed at how well your child can cope without you.

We had wrist straps for the occasional serious runner, especially if we need to cross any roads. We'd hold their hands throughout of course (we don't want anyone to feel that they're on a lead) but it meant that should they twist away from our hand and run, they'd be foiled.

He doesn’t have to go, you can absolutely say no.

However I would speak to the school about the plans, and him about what he thinks (if he has the capacity for that sort of conversation) before you decide.

My son has asd, adhd and gets extremely anxious (he hated school and we had to remove him to home Ed)- but he did actually enjoy the school trips he went on.

This should be 100% about the child and whether he would enjoy the experience, be safe and not compromise the safety or enjoyment of the other children (doubt that this would happen if he has a 1:1). Mother’s anxiety is irrelevant.

He'll be absolutely fine with his TA. My boy was excluded from a lot at that age before he had a 1:1. Don't let your own anxieties be the thing that excludes him. I'd also have a look at what your local offer is, in terms of groups that he could attend without you. Going forward it's really important that he spends time with other children/people like him, to be part of an accepting community. Lots of parents see these things as a break for them, so refuse it on that basis as they feel they don't need it. But it's actually to help the child become integrated into their community. Of course you can offer to go along on the school trip, but it should always be about what will make your child happier, not what would make you feel better. It's hard, I know.

What's the trip?
How are they travelling?
How long will they be gone.

It's quite unusual to do a whole school trip...unless a very small school. Typically these trips leave after registration (9.30) get where they are going around 10/10.30
Do an activity, have lunch, a short activity, and back to school for 3pm. It's not really a full day.

But you can of course say no....they need your permission and you just don't give it.

Where is the trip to? What would he usually be like at this type of place? If he would usually be ok then I would let him go with the 1:1. I’d probably be on stand by just incase they have any issues and you could pick him up.

Can you go to? When my son was in reception I was asked to come to support him. He has additional needs and a parent come to support each child with additional needs to support the staff

This. They will have done a thorough risk assessment.

⬆️This. At least he can take part, join in with the rest of the class and still feel comfortable. It’s worth asking.

Don't automatically exclude him from the trip because you're feeling anxious. Speak to the school and highlight any concerns that you may have about the place he's going and hopefully they'll be able to reassure you.

I taught in a special school, and we took my class of 5-7 year olds/the whole key stage out regularly, sometimes half days, sometimes whole days. And we worked on one TA to two children, plus me.

If your child has a 1 to 1, he'll be fine. He'll likely just follow the other children's lead regarding how he manages the day. My pupils had very severe learning difficulties/Autism, but never once did we have any issues with them being disturbed or anxious about being away from school (other than one who didn't like the darkness in the theatre, but I was able to manage that for him with the help of the theatre staff).

I know you're just at the beginning of handing over your trust to his teachers, but let him go. And have trust in his growing ability to manage new situations.

Talk to the school. Could you drive and meet them there? That way you are there to help but can take him home if he is overwhelmed.

Do you ever go out with him for the day? Ever take him somewhere different? If the answers to both those are no, you perhaps have a point. Otherwise, let school carry out the risk assessments, and ask to see them (I don't know if they will do this or not), or ask how they I tend to keep your son safe.

Also it can’t even be that far away if they are going there and back in one day with a bunch of 4 and 5 year olds.

If he struggles or has a meltdown then they will deal with it. If he’s in mainstream school with a 1:1 then they will be used to dealing with these sorts of situations. Give him a chance, he might enjoy it. What’s the worst that you think will happen?