about birthday party invites

Brilliant news! Have a great party

Yes I think that's too close to Christmas.

Lots of people very likely already have plans, and if not it's likely that they're doing their Christmas prep. That's a very busy weekend.

The weekend of the 2nd would probably be far more convenient.

In my experience it depends how much you lobby the parents/ how well you get on with parents.

I'd just drop a msg in the what's app grp saying you sent out invites last wk and just wondered if people were free as you're aware it's close to Christmas and people are busy.

I don’t think it’s too close, I’d be happy to take DD to a party then (even better if it was a drop off one) however in my experience most people rsvp about a week or two before

It is all a headache - but I would struggle to rsvp now for that weekend. There is so much in flux.

My DD has an august birthday and we have her party mid-July before everyone leaves on holiday. I do not believe she feels this makes her less important to her friends.

My dd's birthday is right before Christmas so parties always in the week before too. When she was younger and parents stayed for the party, it was pretty hit and miss whether parents had the time so close to Christmas.
Once they were old enough to be left, everyone came as the parents loved the time at home without them to wrap presents!
But there's always some parents that don't reply and you have to chase whenever you send the invite.

You sound a bit traumatised?

Where you told as a child your birthday didn't matter? Or was less important.

It might help OP if she knows the experiences of adults who went through this as kids.

Of course she didn't choose to be born then but what a ridiculous response 😂You can't make people attend the party if they've got other plans, I wouldn't prioritise another child's birthday over xmas activities with my own family! We've got 2 children so it would hardly be fair to not do our usual xmas activities just in case 1 sibling got a party invite. Also, as mentioned by a PP, some xmas activities have been booked for months so people won't be free anyway.
That being said OP, it is rude not to RSVP but did you put an RSVP date on the invite?

Missing the point of the thread but we normally have a birthday party that weekend (3 boys all with Xmas Day birthdays so it joint) and I love it! Football/rugby etc tend to have finished by then and I try to not peak Christmas too early. We don’t have masses of ‘family time’ like on MN though.

@fairymary87 waves to fellow December baby…

Can I also add people trying to do joint presents (for birthday and Christmas)?

Again, luckily my Mum was militant on this. My DH did this the first year we were together and I explained if he ever did again he wouldn’t be around for another Christmas - he has learnt.

Everyone who's going on saying it's too close to Christmas how bloody rude. She did NOT chose to be born then!!! You expect your kid's birthday to be attended so give back. Bloody selfish of you. Speaking as a December baby I could never understand why my birthday mattered less but I was expected to celebrate others. You're just telling these people that December kids are not worth it! Gets my back up, get of your high horses!

Maybe we need an official Mumsnet list of acceptable weekends to have a child’s party? I imagine there may be a 3-4 weekends through the year which will be considered acceptable…

I have a Christmas birthday, my Mum used to always have my party the same weekend you are talking about. It was always massively well attended because the parents use to drop off kids and finish their Christmas shopping (in the days before Amazon and also before Christmas started in November).

OP I don’t think it has anything to do with the weekend. In fact I envisage most people are free but they are waiting to see if something else happens/how they fee nearer the time. People have just got rubbish this way since Facebook “maybe” and covid.

Whatsapp invites, as others have said, I think are useful. Easier to remind people, easier to respond and also if one responds often makes other people do to.

Do you have numbers could you make a WhatsApp group for the party now with a a “thought might be easier to respond”?

One of my DD’s was also born on the 23rd of Dec and I’ve actually given up on having parties for her every year. We sort of now make it about her like take her out on that day, an activity for her and her siblings etc and if I happen to be speaking to a parent and know they have nothing planned for Christmas then I can invite their child to join. This year though school closes on the 20th so I’m thinking maybe a party on the 21st for just 2 hours in the morning May be a good time for a party. Like it’s still a weekday but most parents might be off work with their children and may not have travelled for the holiday, etc yet

I'm in the same boat OP. Daughter's bday is Christmas Eve party booked for the 9th December. I know most of the parents so have chased a few in person. I don't want to pay £20 per kid if not coming and I have to pay this Saturday. My daughter is asking her friends too. If no reply by 25th I'm cancelling them off.

If there is a class WhatsApp group or Facebook group I would post on there asking for RSVP's.

I think the 16th is also too close tp Christmas.

People want to be doing their shopping.

Or may have days out planned with the kids.

Santa's grotto,winter wonderland etc The days before Christmas are packed with activities getting ready for the big day. Fitting in a party may be difficult for some.

Gosh the 16th is far too close, the weekend before Christmas Eve weekend? We’ve had plans for months. Of course it’s a priority for you and DD but it’s not for most others sadly. Failing to respond is rude though, I’d message the group chat and maybe say you know it’s really close to Christmas but DD would love if people can attend

I'm sorry but that is probably one of the worst weekends to plan a party for.

I would probably try and do the week before for next year.

Or maybe a couple of weeks into the new year.

Personally if the birthday date doesn't work for us. We regularly do the party up to a couple of months after the actual birthday. Not a big issue here.

But that is a really bad weekend.

So I'm not surprised you haven't had many replies.

But also if you are on this site a lot you'd know this is really common.

People won't reply until the day before or even the day of the actual party.

I only invite via WhatsApp groups now. People are so rude not RSVP ing. WhatsApp seems to be the norm for us, we only ever received invites this way too. Much less stress.

So annoying and rude, OP.

Yes, talk to the parents face-to-face, and frankly I'd have a tick list with me and let them see you actually tick them off!

People seem to have no manners and no imagination sometimes when it comes to responding to invitations.

Sorry OP but I book a Christmas activity every weekends in December, and it's booked by August. It's always so tricky for December and January birthdays isn't it?
I'd WhatsApp all the parents and just ask for a firm reply, can you work out on the class group who is parent to who?

If you are talking about the 23rd it's too close to Christmas, i suspect people are waiting on other plans before replying