We've been together a few years, I brought up marriage and children a year ago and received a not ready yet. I waited another year and I brought it up because I've just been getting frustrated at nothing. We've lived together a few years (renting), I'm approaching mid 30s and running out of time.
Partner has zero debt and a good amount of savings, which is great. He works in a min wage job ATM and isn't sure what to do. His degree is in a creative area which is hard to make into a full-time career.
He said this week that he found the prospect of marriage and the expectations of it daunting but that he does want to marry me. I said I'd be more than happy with a registry office, I have zero interest in a big wedding day, I've made this very clear.
I don't see how his current job means we can't get engaged, I have no interest in an expensive ring etc. I want marriage for what it represents.
He said he wants to be sure he can provide for a child which is totally understandable. We both work full time and I have a very good maternity leave package, flexible working etc.
I said to him I'm not prepared to hang around for years longer waiting, I made my fertility issue very clear.
He does seem to understand that and said I won't be waiting years.
I asked him for complete honesty. I gave him very ample opportunity to say, sorry, not for me, I don't want these things yet. He insisted he wants marriage and children with me.
I totally understand he wants to be earning above min wage. There are many jobs out there which may not be his dream career, but they'll pay a bit more and are stable. However he lacks motivation to do the applications. I'm scared we will be in this position a year from now and I said this to him. He kept saying he doesn't know what to say. I just don't know what to do.