Tradesman Asked Me Out

Are you a man?

How would you feel if someone from your bank got your address or phone number off the system to ask you out? Creeped out? Well it's the same thing.

It's objectively illegal.

Perhaps if he'd asked out a woman from his own generation (at least 20+ years older than me) she'd have been less likely to have an issue with it. It's not acceptable nowadays to use someone's data for what you feel like.

Yabu he only asked. All you needed to do is say no thank you. Blocking is an overreaction. Jeez world is gawn mad…. Man sees woman he fancies, asked her out and he is weird of high proportion 😳

There will always be some people that downplay these things and say it's harmless. But it is a misuse of a person's personal data under GDPR as OP points out. And it makes it harder for woman generally to buy goods and services.

Opposite of Excel!? 🤣

You did exactly the right thing OP. If I were a potential customer of this company I'd be very grateful that you shared that experience.

Of course this sales manager is polite and reasonable. Of course there's nothing you can pin on him as being threatening or aggressive, or that he or his company has let you down in any way. So what exactly is your complaint, madam?

Who cares what his motives are. He could be the most hopeless romantic on the planet. If he persists in making a customer feel uncomfortable he's got a problem and it needs to be called out.

agree
the really creepy men suggest a herbal tea

OP. I think you did the right thing.

None of that is any of your business or relevant.

good luck!

I've known him for years and did tell him.

Your comment history says you're a mid-50s male.

Ask yourself why you're on a site for women implying they'll be 'spinsters' if they report harassment.

You're the same sort of age as the guy who sent the message.

Be sure to tell him the whole saga about the creepy tradesman and see how he reacts.

Thanks - I have a date this week.

My business is doing brilliantly well. Best of luck with your dating.

You identifying with a creepy (and illegal) action is your problem. Best of luck with your business.

You absolutely made the right decision.

Thank you. I've felt better since leaving the review.

Well done OP!

https://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-66588085

"There might be this misperception that this is romantic. But it is not romantic - it's not okay, it can be very intimidating and actually it's against the law," she added.

Ms Keaney said that both the company and the individual employee could be held liable for such behaviour.

"The organisations have a responsibility that when anybody shares their data that they use it in the way that we would expect - just for the purposes that it has been shared," she said.

"If they are not doing that, that is potentially a breach of data protection law.
"But also, it is potentially an offence for that individual to be accessing info and using it for personal purposes. They could end up in court and being fined for that."

OP - deleted my last account since a few of the replies were so misogynistic it put me off the site.

After reading the comments, I decided to leave an honest review. I said the quality of work was good etc. though the phone number I'd provided solely for the work to be completed had been used to ask me on a date and I felt this was inappropriate. I gave a good rating overall but clicked no for the 'would you recommend' box.

To address the other comments about me being 'hysterical' - no, I'm not changing my locks. I'm a reasonable person.

I just wanted to gauge why he might have done it.

I found an ICO statement:

https://ico.org.uk/about-the-ico/media-centre/news-and-blogs/2023/08/one-in-three-young-people-falling-prey-to-text-pests-as-ico-calls-for-victims-to-come-forward/

• Research commissioned by the ICO reveals that 29% of 18-34-year-olds received unwanted contact after giving their personal information to a business.
• 66% of the public believes it is not morally right to use personal details given for business purposes for romantic or sexual propositions. Only 5% believe it to be morally right.
• “It is against the law.” - ICO takes steps to combat “text pests”, contacting major delivery companies to emphasise of legal obligations.

Unclench. He doesn't have her work address.

Having sex is a bit of a reach from having coffee!!!!

Yes he was unprofessional but the OP is on high alert due to past experience and is in danger of this spoiling her moving into her lovely new house.

I fully understand her. Trust me. However I think she should at least give him the chance to take no for an answer and move on rather than expecting the worst and worrying about GDPR etc. From his messages re keys there is no evidence he was deliberately trying to follow her to work or stall her. I mean this for her mental health, not for the sake of being nice to random men taking chances asking women out.

Usually 'no' will be the end of the matter. Change the locks if it gives peace of mind. If it isn't the end of the matter, then you can move onto resporting him etc or worrying but why jump a step? Part of recovering from shit experiences is yes, being wise to risk but developing proportionality in your responses.

OP is right. Its very creepy.

Imagine the person has your phone number, email address, bank account details, home address and had a key to your house for several days. You know nothing about them

Exactly. + your work address too.

From some of the stupid 'be kind' type replies on here I suspect some responders are men