To stop giving DS snacks?

Lots of snacks and smaller meals are probably better for him at that age, he's only got a tiny tummy and learning to eat when he feels hungry is a good thing. So what if he doesn't eat a full dinner at the pre-ordained dinner time? As long as the snacks are varied and nutritious it's a perfectly viable way of eating.

Could it be an issue with sauces / food touching? Lots of toddlers go through phases where they have an issue with that and prefer individual items which your snacks are but your meals aren’t.

Also.. from an anthropological perspective, meals and snacks are merely social constructs anyway. The structure in our culture (3 large meals and one or two small snacks) isn’t the only correct one. I’d serve food you’re happy for him to eat, and which he enjoys, at times he’s hungry versus telling him to eat when he’s not (if that makes sense, I wasn’t that chill with my own kids! But hindsight is 20/20 lol).

Breakfast is basically sugar, so I would expect he genuinely feels hungry when his blood glucose crashes, and then you give more sugary stuff... and so on.

Just changing breakfast to something proteiny and whole fruit (rather than sugary cereal and sugary juice) might make a significant difference to how the rest of the day pans out.

I would also change breakfast - porridge and fruit would be better than Cheerios - though I used to give Cheerios at 5am so we could stay in bed a bit longer so I can’t talk really

Offer savoury not sweet snacks only and see if anything changes

Our snacks are veg sticks. Bag carrots and cucumber easily do a week.

If mine don't finish a meal, it comes out at the next food time. Snack or meal, whatever is next.
Snacks are nearly always sitting somewhere, rarely roaming.
Oat based breakfast or toast only.

Maybe try a later lunch with you and family at weekend. May eat more /better

Just seems so early esp if have a snack

My daughter is slightly younger (2.5) but exactly the same.
Always eats breakfast usually weetabix
hardly ever eats lunch
sometimes eats dinner
constantly looking for snacks.. I think it’s normal toddler nonsense. I’ve got two older children who were just like this at 2/3 and now eat normally so I’m hoping this one sorts herself out too at some point.

1130 is early for lunch unless has to be and pre school for 12;30

I would stop snacks or make literally fruit or bread stick

You give too many nice sugary snacks so if he doesn't eat much he knows will get a nice snack

He’s 3.5, give him what you have, & certainly no snacks if he can’t eat his meals.

I think some people are just naturally grazers. I wouldn’t cut out the snacks, in fact, counterintuitive as it sounds, I’d be giving more substantial / healthier snacks. Something like peanut butter toast, half a sandwich, some hummus and things to dip in it. A fruit bowl he can help himself to. Even at 17, my ds isn’t a three square meals guy, but he’s a great cook with a varied palate.

I would cut the sugar at breakfast and increase the protein. Cheerios plus grapes is quite sugary. And cheerio’s aren’t filling.

Wholemeal toast and peanut butter / cheese on toast / scrambled egg etc plus 1 type of fruit and some milk?

Those snacks aren't great. They are sugary and will want him asking for more.

I would cut out all snacks and if he's hungry just give him his lunch or dinner earlier.

It is such a waste if he is not eating his lunch and dinner and instead just eating sugary snacks.

I think you’ve two trains of thought in this thread- personally I think with growth spurts at this age I think you’re very 3 meals with a tiny bit thrown in but it depends on feeding times because if breakfast is eg 7 o clock and lunch is 1 then 1 cereal bar is pretty small, in the same way if dinner is 4 then a tea mightn’t do any harm. And a snack isn’t a bad thing if it’s fruit or veg, crackers and cheese etc! Ps multigrain cheerios aren’t that bad, people will always suggest porridge just because it’s filling but only 2 out of 4 here eat it and personally I’m not a fan for myself!! Best of luck op, you’re doing a fine job!

Does he feel full quickly? That might be worth looking into.

Of course he wants breakfast and snacks and not his other meals, look at what you are giving him, it's all sweet stuff. Stop giving him sweet stuff when he asks for a snack, make his breakfast savoury and you'll find the tables turn.

First thing I’d do in your case, is ditch the snacks- yes.

I think that seems perfectly normal for a 3.5 year old. I think the breakfast and snacks are quite sugary carb, which can lead to more hunger as doesn't fill them up. Something more substantial (like beans on toast - I'm aware beans do have lots of sugar/salt, but they are also more filling/protein heavy - or scrambled eggs and toast, or porridge, etc.). And for snacks, crackers and cheese, hummus and breadsticks, a boiled egg, cheese and a banana, something less sugar and higher in fat/protein.

Otherwise, I don't think it sounds like much food for a 3 year old (certainly not too much!). Mine were definitely eating more than that at 3 and were generally around 50th centile. Some kids are just heavier. It doesn't mean they are 'overweight'. They're growing. I had a friend whose dd was like that. She was like a tank. I couldn't life her. She was tall too and she didn't look overweight at all, but she was just so dense and heavy. That's just how she was built. She's a pre-teen now and a perfectly healthy weight, but quite tall. I think that was just part of her growth at that age.

He prefers chocolate rice and granola bars to dinners, as they often do. I'd limit them much more and I think he'd eat much more of his main meals.