Train etiquette

She was very obviously being not just massively rude and entitled, but she sounds unhinged.

Having said that, I really dislike the whole "haha shoulda been more nippy!" attitude. I commute by tube and it's always the super fit young blokes that race inside and grab all the seats, and the older and infirm people who are left to stand. It's really shit that the less physically capable you are, the less likely you are to get a seat. I don't mean disabled necessarily, a lot of people have chronic health problems or are older or just a bit infirm on their feet, but don't consider themselves disabled or very elderly so don't feel they can demand someone give up their seat.

This doesn't apply to the OP at all, it just makes me angry when I see young fit people race inside, veer around other people, and basically act like they're in some kind of extreme sports competition to try to beat obviously less fast or more infirm people to seats, then look smug about it.

This. Sounds like she was the one who needs to understand train etiquette. Not you. Polite of you to move, but I'd have told her to either share the table or do one.

If it’s an unreserved seat, it’s first come, first served. You did nothing wrong.

I think if they genuinely booked those exact seats (rarely happens nowadays on a standard train ride) then it shouldn't take much for them to prove this to you. If someone is able to prove that to me, then I would move because I would honour that. But what I wouldn't do is move because somebody tells me this without proof because they could be utterly bullshitting me.

Yes. I wouldn't move seats, I'd tell her she's welcome to sit on the two free seats, if she does and continued to bad mouth me, yes, I would tell her to shut the fuck up and call her out.

When I'm travelling with my friend who struggles I nip on, bag a seat, then give it up to her when she gets on. I find most people are good at offering seats to people who look like they might struggle, but my friends disability is not visible.

And you're proud of this?

I'd have told her to shut the fuck up.

I think you got up and moved because your husband said he was going to, and that you would then be going against two people instead of just one Karen .

Had your husband smiled sweetly at her and said : "this is not the kind of train that caters for specific seat bookings and being first come – first served, these are the seats we have allocated ourselves, but there are plenty other is for you to sit in elsewhere" then I think you would not have moved a muscle. It's a shame you didn't know she was gonna bitch about you even if you moved because that may have helped you not to move. And I agree with a previous poster that you've only just helped reinforce her Karen-ish behaviour which is a bit of a shame.

Apologies for anyone called Karen ! But I live with teenagers and they use that all the time and so it's become the only way to really truly express the kind of person behaving the way that she is!

You have enforced that her bad behaviour gets her what she wants. The sensible thing to do would have been to stay in the seats and tell her there were also two there if she wanted them. If she moaned just put your headphones on and leave her to it, silly woman.

Honestly I’d have done the exact same!! Especially after such a lovely weekend away what’s the point in having to sit there for the rest of the journey in hostile vibes!
some days I might have sat there anyway, and I’m sure you would too! But some days it is just nice to have a drama free life and take a couple extra seconds to find other seats to have a nice journey! I hope it didn’t put a dampener on the trip
the other night me and my partner waited over 3 hours for food in a restaurant and yeah it was shit but what else would we be doing? Sitting at home in a bad mood, so we just sat, chatted and enjoyed the meal with no complaints, sometimes it’s just nice to take things like this casually because in reality it’s not a big deal, it is just some seats or just a meal x

I'd have just moved next to DH so one side was free. She was by to moan, you were being unreasonable to move.

No way would I have moved in that situation.So many entitled people these days.She does it because it works.

Thus allowing her to do it again to someone else in the future because it worked every time before.

I think you know the answer . You were there first and took possession of the seats so they were yours. I hope people call her out on her entitlement in future otherwise she'll continue to behave this way.

No saving seats for a friend who hasn't been as nippy with boarding

I think that is actually reasonable if the friend is just behind you.

And I often make sure my DM has a seat if it's a free for all as she is 83 and not as "nippy with boarding".

I'd have asked her whether she has a seat reservation and said that they were welcome to sit next to us. And would have given a Paddington bear stare at the tantrum.

She was a twat. There were four people and four seats, you could all sit down.

On a very busy train with no seat reservations the etiquette is you find the first empty seat , sit down and shut the fuck up.

I think etiquette might vary, but on my train its first bum first served as far as seats go.
No saving seats for a friend who hasn't been as nippy with boarding. No asking someone to move, and a 'someone's sitting there' would be met with a swift 'yeah, me!'

Actually if there was seats elsewhere I would walk away too to get away from an irrational person. Its not worth it. But empty seat is usually fair game.