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AIBU?

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Original poster

This mum just blocked my toddler from approaching hers

413 replies

Skysky1 · 04/10/2023 14:17

was in town today walking through M&S , with my 3 yr old.
We had just bought toys in the previous shop so he was out of pram and walking with his new toys in his hands and was excited about them.
Walking parallel to us was also a mum with toddler (around two)
My son approached him from the side and started walking directly next to him showing him his toys whilst they were both walking , the child smiled in response and didn't appear to seem at unease, however the mum swiftly stopped and put her arm out in front of my son blocked him between her arm and a Column so that he couldn't go any further and then she said ' excuse me ' as if for him to back away.
He turned to face me and I swooped him up and said ' he's only a toddler'
To which she didn't respond, she carried on walking and I changed direction.
I was left feeling quite sad for my son
I just wanted other mum's opinions on this . Was I in the wrong for letting my child approach hers , I guess everyone is entitled to their personal space. However I never anticipated that reaction it just seemed like a mean thing to do , and I'm always very welcoming to other kids that approach us

OP posts:
MamaToABeautifulBoy · 04/10/2023 15:07

MN isn’t the place to come for sensible responses. The woman behaved strangely. I can understand why you’re upset. If she was offsetting a tantrum, she only needed so say! People can be v odd.

WanderingWitches · 04/10/2023 15:06

GalaApples · 04/10/2023 14:38

YANBU. She was rude, and whatever her reasons it would not have hurt her to briefly explain her reasons. It is so sad that many people are inconsiderate of other people's feelings, and just don't bother.

Maybe she was fed up of explaining?
My son had an organ transplant as a baby and the amount of people who thought it was OK to approach him, touch him even. He was highly immunosuppressed for over a year. I even had a notice on his pram, but people don't read/care.

I remember one day I was just totally fed up of looking at 4 walls are took the risk of sitting in a quiet cafe when some man decided he wanted to sit with us at our table. I told him no and why but he just got annoyed and wouldn't listen. I ended up walking out. If your toddler had approached mine that day, I'd have probably done the same as the woman did.

skippy67 · 04/10/2023 15:05

happsy · 04/10/2023 14:25

This. Why even make it into anything. Sad? Really, just get over it. She doesn't even know you, why take it so personally?

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All of this.

Verv · 04/10/2023 15:05

Mariposista · 04/10/2023 14:48

I'd have been tempted to say 'got somewhere to be have you?' dripping with sarcasm.
obviously wouldn't have actually lowered myself to that level in front of the kiddies. What a twat. Your boy sounds lively and friendly.

Oh no, not "got somewhere to go have you?" to another mother who's minding her own business in town with her kid?!
What a total twat, the blocking mother should've stopped immediately, sat cross legged on the pavement and looked on in adoring rapture while the 3 year old did a small QVC style presentation about each new toy along with RRP and pre-owned values along with a nice review covering colour, shock resistance and chewability for the 2 year old who can then advise his clearly not busy mother with nowhere to go about which one she should go out and purchase for him post-haste.

You absolute egg.

MysteryBelle · 04/10/2023 15:04

Yes she was very rude. It is always rude and mean to be dismissive to a little child. Nothing excuses her classless behavior.

Remember that not all people are nice or decent. Including on this thread.

loislovesstewie · 04/10/2023 15:03

My thought was that she thought her child might snatch the toy and was trying to prevent that.

CheshireCat1 · 04/10/2023 15:02

I wouldn’t worry about it.

Wheresmypal · 04/10/2023 15:02

EaudeJavel · 04/10/2023 14:50

nowhere has the old MN saying be more fitting:

ARE YOU ON GLUE?

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Are you on glue?

That made me laugh and laugh. I have not heard saying for ages! Oh, took me right back to the 80s!

Seriously OP, there is no reason to feel sad for your son. He won't even remember it! And kids get all sorts of knock backs from each other throughout the day!

There is no reason to give this any thought at all.

MrTiddlesTheCat · 04/10/2023 14:58

Maybe she was worried your child was going to follow her home like a stray puppy.

Or more likely, your child was getting in her space and annoying her, and rather than stopping it, you were looking on endulgently, so she had to take action herself.

Canisaysomething · 04/10/2023 14:58

You don’t know the reason so don’t sweat it.

MoreThanEnoughSoFar · 04/10/2023 14:57

Sometimes... you just don't want your child to interact with others. There may be multiple reasons and they are all some you need to respect. The "he's just a toddler" is sometimes heard as "I can't be bothered to control my child so I let him run wild."

If you apologise in this situation instead of defending your little devil-spawn angel, you will defuse the situation. If you say "I'm so sorry for him barging into you, he got away from me" chances are she will relax, smile, even tell you that her child is tired, ill, infectious etc and that's why she's limiting contact.

Queucumber · 04/10/2023 14:56

Chicken pox?

margotrose · 04/10/2023 14:56

Skysky1 · 04/10/2023 14:54

I think it was more so her removing my child from her environment rather than continuing on with her child.

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It's the same thing.

Playingintheshadow · 04/10/2023 14:55

I wouldn't even give it a second thought. The reason, if there is one, doesn't matter.

Original poster
Skysky1 · 04/10/2023 14:54

LemonLight · 04/10/2023 14:50

I think gently YABU to be honest. Out shopping isn't always the time to initiate an interaction with a stranger, some people don't want to be approached by someone they don't know and have every right to go about their business. You can't really expect every random stranger to want your kid hovering around because you think it's cute.

Edited

I think it was more so her removing my child from her environment rather than continuing on with her child.

OP posts:
CuriouslyMinded · 04/10/2023 14:54

I don't think either of you were wrong OP. It's fine for you to let your little one approach other kids and it's fine for their parents to nip the interaction in the bud if they don't have time/don't want the interaction.
Try not to take it personally for you or your son.

Neverwatchedgameofthrones · 04/10/2023 14:54

Grow up OP

usernother · 04/10/2023 14:53

You'll never know why she did it. I wouldn't give it another thought OP.

EaudeJavel · 04/10/2023 14:53

WongWifi · 04/10/2023 14:48

Just reading some of these responses saddens me. There’s nothing wrong with being polite.

Bothering complete strangers and delaying them with inane talks about yourself and your feelings is extremely rude.

it's hilarious on this forum, but in real life, it's bonkers and bad-mannered.

truthhurts23 · 04/10/2023 14:53

Weird. Why couldn’t she just give a little smile and then scurry off ? Did she really need to put her arm out and be dramatic ..

Hufflepods · 04/10/2023 14:53

@Mariposista I'd have been tempted to say 'got somewhere to be have you?' dripping with sarcasm.

Absolutely unhinged.

pinkyredrose · 04/10/2023 14:52

Mariposista · 04/10/2023 14:48

I'd have been tempted to say 'got somewhere to be have you?' dripping with sarcasm.
obviously wouldn't have actually lowered myself to that level in front of the kiddies. What a twat. Your boy sounds lively and friendly.

Seriously? It's a shop not soft play. I do think some parents think their kids is the centre of the world.

givemushypeasachance · 04/10/2023 14:51

Replace toddlers with dogs. Someone else has a dog walking close up next to them, and your dog wanders up tail wagging to say hello. Sometimes the other owners are happy about that and see it as nice the two dogs can stop to meet and maybe play together. But other times people just want to get going, or their dog is shy or reactive, or a million other reasons why they don't react positively to your dog's "being friendly". That's not personal it's just life and other people having their own shit going on.

CowboyJoanna · 04/10/2023 14:51

Maybe the mum taught her children not to talk to strangers

EaudeJavel · 04/10/2023 14:50

Mariposista · 04/10/2023 14:48

I'd have been tempted to say 'got somewhere to be have you?' dripping with sarcasm.
obviously wouldn't have actually lowered myself to that level in front of the kiddies. What a twat. Your boy sounds lively and friendly.

nowhere has the old MN saying be more fitting:

ARE YOU ON GLUE?

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