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AIBU?

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Original poster

To pay the babysitter?

37 replies

Gorgeouscombes · 22/09/2023 21:39

DH & I have a long planned night out. Babysitter is booked. We’ve not had a paid babysitter before (don’t go out much and if we do normally family would look after the DCs).
Then DC has a vomiting episode and we can’t go. Parent 1 thinks we should pay the babysitter who has kept her evening free for us. Parent 2 thinks this is unnecessary- the babysitter had several hours notice of the cancellation and the arrangement was to pay by the hour. 0 hours = 0 £.
Who is right? And what have you done in these circumstances?

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Fifthtimelucky · 23/09/2023 12:42

I ageee it depends on who the babysitter is.

Neither of my daughters would have expected, or accepted, money in this situation. They only babysat for neighbours. But a "professional" babysitter would be different as they could have turned down another job.

RecklessBlackberries · 23/09/2023 09:03

I would pay an adult the whole amount, or at least offer to. Especially if it's someone you have a relationship with (eg our babysitter works at our son's nursery). If it was a teenager doing it, I'd pay at least half or possibly all of it if they were cheap.

My logic is that teenagers are more likely to be able to rearrange their plans and still see friends or enjoy their evening. And an adult who goes to the inconvenience of babysitting probably needs the money, while for a teen it's probably pocket money supplements.

PeloMom · 23/09/2023 01:16

You pay the full amount if it’s less than 24 hour notice

ZeldaWillTellYourFortune · 23/09/2023 01:12

Of course you should pay the full amount! Come on.

UsingChangeofName · 23/09/2023 01:04

Another who thinks paying half would be fair.

I mean, there are a lot of "it depends", but overall, that seems fairest.

ThreePointOneFourOneFiveNine · 23/09/2023 01:01

You should definitely pay. The babysitter was expecting to get paid for an evenings work, and would have presumably taken on another booking if it hadn't been you. They'll be out of pocket if you don't pay.

mathanxiety · 23/09/2023 00:57

Pay at least half. You may need this babysitter again. Think of it as earnest money.

SadlyACupOfTeaDoesNotSolveEverything · 23/09/2023 00:57

splishsplash3 · 22/09/2023 21:46

I'm a babysitter.
If you're cancelling 24 hours or less before the booking then you should pay. If you're being stingy pay 50%.

If you don't pay at all I'd just never accept a booking from you again.

This seems reasonable. Not paying anything is rude.

Peaceandquietfinally · 23/09/2023 00:57

As a mum of children trying to earn money I definitely think you should pay babysitter 50% of earnings.

Thursa · 23/09/2023 00:53

Pay the babysitter

caringcarer · 23/09/2023 00:07

Pay half is fair. The babysitter had you booked in so could take another booking.

Pumpkinspicelattetime · 22/09/2023 23:31

Of course you should pay. How would you feel if your work gave you just a few hours notice you weren't needed for a shift and so didn't pay you?

CherryMaDeara · 22/09/2023 22:34

Your H is a tight sod. I’d pay her.

NurseryNurse10 · 22/09/2023 22:32

Of course you should pay her. She may well have been depending on that money.

GuardiansPlayList · 22/09/2023 22:32

I would rebook the babysitter for when the child is better.

friendlycat · 22/09/2023 22:28

Depends how much notice you gave which doesn’t sound much. Accepting you didn’t have notice of illness, babysitter had booked you into diary and made a commitment to you.

If the role was reversed how would you have felt if you had booked tickets say to the theatre, concert etc all non refundable at several hours notice and babysitter had cancelled with a few hours notice? You would have missed concert etc with no refund.

ActDottie · 22/09/2023 22:05

I’d pay her, she could’ve found other work that evening but giving her only several hours notice I think it’s unlikely.

NuffSaidSam · 22/09/2023 22:05

You should pay.

1987qwerty · 22/09/2023 22:02

Of course you pay

jannier · 22/09/2023 22:02

Nothing worse than having turned down invitations or work then get dumped last minute definitely pay it's not their fault and if you ever need them again they will agree to do it.

Hellodarknessmyoldpal · 22/09/2023 22:02

I think you should pay unless she is able to fill the slot which is unlikely as I would assume several hours means you've cancelled earlier that day. It's annoying but just one of those things.

Freepo · 22/09/2023 21:58

Less than 24h notice you should pay

Cece92 · 22/09/2023 21:52

I'd still pay especially if it's less than 24 hours notice. They could have done another baby sitting job and have kept their night free for you. Xxxx

Motheranddaughtertotwo · 22/09/2023 21:51

I’d pay for at least a couple of hours, they could have missed another booking for you.

EdithStourton · 22/09/2023 21:51

It depends a bit who it is.

If an adult, they probably really need the cash, so pay half. If a local teen, mine when they babysat tended to see it as the luck of the draw. Apologise and that's enough - but if it happens again, it would be wise to pay something or they'll start refusing your bookings.