'Increase' in ASD/ADHD

Lots! My adult son is severely autistic and takes a few different medications.

@Robinni you articulate what I meant much better than I did!

Thanks

What @lifeturnsonadime said.

Nobody is against you participating in conversation @Westernesse , it is totally fine to have concerns regarding your child’s diagnostic report and to voice them.

However, it is double standards, and indeed fraudulent, to then use that same diagnostic report as evidence to claim benefits if you believe it to be false.

Then you show up here casting doubt on all autism assessments saying you doubt they’re valid, calling medical professionals charletons, saying the bar is very low for diagnosis and that adults shouldn’t seek diagnosis at all.

None of that is remotely ok.

It is possible to be the parent of a ND child and be ableist just as it is possible to be disabled and be ableist, as you demonstrated earlier on this thread when you claimed that you believe that many diagnoses are false based on your experience of your DC's diagnostic process and implied that adults should not even seek diagnosis. I can't find the exact wording but it was deleted because it breached talk guidelines.

I have no idea why you think that me questioning your position amounts to an attack, it isn't. If you make bold claims on AIBU then you should be able to justify them or you will be called out.

It is, whether you are prepared to admit it or not, hypocritical to say that the diagnostic process that your DC went through was so bad/ poorly carried out that you have no faith that diagnoses from that team are correct and use that as evidence to suggest that diagnoses are wrongly handed out. Whilst using the SAME diagnosis as part of the application for DLA. You said your child is now fine and doesn't give a shit if they are diagnosed or not and doesn't have interventions which makes me wonder how they were eligible for DLA (you stated you claim it for them in a post at 18.00 today) in the first place as this is based on need not diagnosis (at least in theory) and needs more than a diagnostic report to claim it.

I find it shocking that any parent of a child with autism would perpetuate a myth that diagnoses are not thorough and are unreliable whilst simultaneously benefiting from the same (supposedly unreliable) diagnosis.

And then claim that other children and adults must be wrongly diagnosed based on an unreliable diagnosis for their child (because the process is either unreliable or it isn't, it really can't be both) which they have gone on to use as part of a benefits claim!

You’re the only person calling people names. Accusing someone with an ND diagnosed child of being ableist is controversial and is a personal insult.

as for being a hypocrite, I’ve explained my reasoning by answering all your questions and you continue to cry “hypocrite hypocrite”. For me it’s complicated and I do the best I can.

using the word hypocrite isn’t really the win you think it is. The internet have moved on. I doubt that your are not a hypocrite or that anyone here is not a hypocrite. You may as well cry “human, human”.

@Gerrataere sadly, you're right and people do think this. I have difficulties, even though if you met me for 10 mins you might never guess that I'm autistic.
They pervade into almost every area of my life.
However, and I'm stealing this from somewhere as it's a fantastic way of putting it:
I speak NT with an ND accent, whereas most NT folk don't attempt to speak ND or recognise it as a language.

Act what way, asking questions on a discussion forum?

If you are going to make controversial posts then it is entirely normal to be asked questions about it.

Particularly when your position is both hypocritical and ableist.

No one on here is going to like the fact that you are claiming that your child's diagnosis process was so appalling it is not reliable in order to cast doubt on the veracity of the diagnoses of others YET you don't think it is unreliable enough that you haven't asked for a second opinion for your child and your child/ you benefit from the same (unreliable according to you) diagnosis.

I can't help the fact that you don't like being called out for being a hypocrite, that's on you. Have a good night.

I think many parents are desperate for schools and medical professionals to be aware and supportive of their child’s needs which is why they quite rightly seek diagnosis.

Mot sure why your child is worthy of that but others aren’t. And yy to lifeturnsonadime ‘s post. If you don’t want to be questioned or dejected don’t post offensive and ableist posts with zero data to back up inflammatory claims.

I’m not so convinced though, and I’ve not even said I don’t think the diagnosis is wrong. Please read the actual words on the screen.

You are being aggressive and if you don’t like what I’m saying to the point that it makes you act that way then that’s up to you.

I would never suggest that all people with ASD can’t socialise, just like the stereotype that all people with adhd are the life and soul of the party! But, however much your comment may be tongue in cheek, plenty of people do genuinely believe ASD isn’t a true disability, it’s ‘just another way of thinking’ or worse ‘a superpower’. It’s really not the case, and really quite dismissive of the realities of living with ASD with global delays and/or severely limited capacity.

@Westernesse

The point being you appear to doubt that your child’s diagnosis is accurate.

But do nothing about it.

If they aren’t disabled then they aren’t entitled to the money.

Do you not think you should get on to getting a second opinion if you are so convinced.

I'm not being aggressive at all, I'm just challenging your hypocrisy which is plain to see. If you really didn't believe your child was autistic and it was all false then you would have the diagnosis removed unless it is of benefit to them.

No one wants an autism diagnosis. If your child is really doing well without interventions then why would you want it on their records if it is so blatantly false because of the bad practice of the diagnostic team?

You have complained you don't like my tone, well I don't like the fact that you are stating that you believe that diagnoses are being falsified (to what end exactly? ) , and being ableist and dismissive of problems because you can't see them.

I would suggest that if you don't like being questioned on a discussion forum perhaps consider not posting offensive posts and being a hypocrite about your own child's position.

Oh and my child couldn’t give a shit one way or the other about his diagnosis.

I don’t like your aggressive and patronising tone but I will answer.

we sought an assessment when he was struggling to settle and it took a loooong time by watch point he was much more settled but we saw the process through.

there aren’t really any “interventions”. School is aware and supportive and that’s about it.

I haven’t made any complaint because I can’t be bothered. I would much rather focus on my family than pour time and energy into something like that.

I’ve already explained why I haven’t sought a second opinion.

@Gerrataere tongue in cheek comment there from me.
However, I must say I socialise very well with my neuro type, just in a different manner.

As someone with autistic children and who shows more than a few traits themselves, absolutely disagree I’m afraid. If autism is the next step of human evolution then the human race is definitely not built for survival. Humans are social mammals, how is it progressive to our species to slowly eradicate social and emotional fluidity?

Autism is on the rise because it’s mostly hereditary and the population has risen humorously in the last couple of centuries. Better healthcare means that those who wouldn’t have survived (both physically or socially) or procreated many years ago due to their autism are living and even making more autistic offspring than ever. That isn’t evolution though.

Actually I've just re-read your post and it seems to be that you are not sure whether the child is autistic or not but you don't care either because your child is getting support.

Has it occurred to you that if autism interventions are working for your DC it is evidence that that diagnosis is right?

I hope you don't let your DC know your doubts, how traumatic it would be for them that your DC that their parent doubts their disability.

I'm just interested why:

a) you took them to be diagnosed in the first place?
b) you haven't put in an official complaint about the shortcomings of the original diagnosis?

c) you haven't sought a second opinion?

This is AIBU before you start saying that I am being unreasonable. If you are going to start making bold claims about diagnoses being inaccurate you should be able to back them up and explain why you have an 'I'm alright Jack to your DC's diagnoses' whilst claiming that those of others are unreliable or false?

So do you think your child is autistic or don't you?

Do you think that the process has resulted in the correct diagnosis?

It is a bold claim to say that the process was right for your DC but is wrong for other children when you actually know nothing about their lives other than what you see on the surface. Presumably if your child is autistic you will be aware that they can present differently at home than in public or even in school?

You asked why I am not seeing for my child to be reassessed. I answered your question. That is the answer. You don’t get to choose the answer.

I am not absolutely confident in the diagnosis but I am frankly past caring as long as he is doing well, which he is. So it is the right outcome, in that sense.

This reminds me a bit of when my DS was first diagnosed. I was desperate for the clinical psychologist to reassure me that his autism was mild.

He turned round and said ' Mrs Life' your child can't attend school because it's too overwhelming and has been trying to kill himself, that's not very mild is it? ..... '

I'd happily give back every penny of DLA for my child to have had a normal childhood and for me not to have had to give up my career which paid way more than mid rate DLA to keep my child safe at home rather than killing himself.

Maybe we're just taking over the world.
There is a school of thought that describes us autistics as the next evolution.
(Ducks for cover)

I didn't ask if your child is thriving. I am glad they are. It's great they can now access support.

I asked why you have such faith that you child's diagnosis is correct when you appear so disdainful of other children who have been diagnosed using the same process and claim that those diagnoses are not?

Do you not see the hypocrisy in your position. Your child's alright but others are faking it?

Do you know I sometimes feel like I get a bit of imposter syndrome with my younger DC who is on mid rate DLA, until it comes to filling out forms and getting all of the medical evidence together that goes with doing that and I realise that it's completely insane to think she isn't entitled to benefits.

Her life is so different from other children the same age, in almost every way. So much harder. Most of her struggles are invisible to any onlooker but that doesn't mean they are not real or don't exist. Her diagnosis report was devastating because it clearly set out how she was not like most 9 year old and that comes with the realisation that she will need additional support in one way or another for the rest of her life.

Without independent evidence of how a person struggles an autistic person will be declined for DLA and/ or PIP. Many are declined EVEN with evidence because the particular assessor doesn't understand the benefits rules & then on top of having a disabled child and all of the additional expenses and emotional toil that brings to families you also have to fight for what they are entitled to.

Such ignorance and ableism in one post.