To not think I’m doing anything wrong here?

I see you completely ignore the part of my post where I point how your behaviour is treating people like robots and thats quite dehumanising.

Are you ok being treated like a robot...actually you would probably say yes.

I work in a place where my manager speaks like this to people on the phone (and sometimes in person) and everyone finds it incredibly rude. It has created a bit of a rift between the staff he manages and himself. I understand why he does it, he's trying to get a job done and has another job to move on to after the phone call, but the reality is it has greatly effected staff relations with him.

I wouldn't chat about personal life, you don't even need to ask a question or make small talk to be honest, but a simple "hey, it's X, hope I'm not interrupting you but....." or "hey, it's X, sorry for annoying you but....." and definitely a "thanks, bye" at the end!

I would find you rude if you just hung up on me!

I have a very busy job, don’t always have time or inclination for small talk. The call you describe, for me would go ‘Oh hi Susie, just a quick one [demonstrates you don’t want to go into platitudes], would you be able to send me that document please, when you’ve got the chance? [Susie: yeah sure, I’ll do it this afternoon]

Brill, cheers. Bye! [hang up]. Susie has the chance to clarify or at least answer. It’s obvious the conversation is over.

if someone called me in the middle of an actual emergency, I’d expect less ‘closure’ at the end of the call but the context would set that up and just a routine call isn’t an emergency.

If you were a man and behaved like that on phone calls to me I would probably look to see if you spoke to other men like that as well. Because it’s abrupt and could seem quite supercilious, like your time is more important than treating me as a person. I’d also find you unapproachable as a colleague if I thought I was always going to get short shrift when I asked you a question or took up your time.

As for ‘men don’t do small talk’ well nobody’s told the men I work with… or my husband and his work mates… there’s small talk and ‘chatting about bollocks all afternoon’.

I agree and often find myself willing someone to get to the point. However, hi goodbyes etc are in linguistic terms phatic tokens. Phatic communication is small talk: the use of language to share feelings or establish a mood of sociability rather than to communicate specific information or ideas. It is a politeness convention rather than purposeful and probably part of the business is to be sociable ish?. I keep to hi/bye as I haven't got the time or interest to drag things out. It is quite a gendered thing too and women (from studies) are more likely to participate in small talk.

Well you don’t have time do you? Because clearly relationship management is time consuming and realistically you need to be able to do that too if you are going to be able to take a career step up next.

I’d start pushing back/delegating.

If that is true where you work, it’s definitely not true universally. Where I work, we have not only attainment targets, but expected behaviours. One of which is ‘respecting others’. That might mean demonstrating basic politeness, like saying goodbye when ending a conversation, but also might mean tailoring your communication style to suit the people on the receiving end. Men being brusque (rude) and not attempting to show respect for others would absolutely be treated as a performance issue.

You don't have to spend hours on the phone making small talk, but a simple hello and goodbye is just basic courtesy. I think if a colleague rang me to ask me to do something for them or send something over, and they didn't even bother saying goodbye, I'd take it rather personally.

You don't have to feign interest in what their dog smelt like after it rolled around in fox shit all weekend, you don't even have to ask them how their day is going. But ffs, at least say cheerio when you're done. You never know, you might find yourself a little less stressed if you take a couple of minutes during the day to interact with your colleagues?

YABU and rude.

No OP- if you were a man you wouldn’t be praised for this. You’d be called a grumpy bastard behind your back too.

why are you so busy when other people aren’t? Is it because you have been super efficient so have been given more to do? Is it that colleagues could take on more of your workload but don’t offer (possibly because they don’t like you)?

A man who had views for promotion would do the soft skills and winning people over thing, delegate more tasks, then argue with management he needed another assistant /more staff as the work load couldn’t be covered by them.

You said you are a manager- you are too busy to add a few seconds into each call length to do social niceties, yet more junior colleagues can fit half an hour calls in. This is a sign you aren’t good at managing your own time and delegating to others.

will those more junior people ever be asked to do 360 style appraisals of your performance?

More bollocks. This absolutely is not true; see my other reply above.
I’m far from being praised for my ‘efficient’ manner!

I was taught personal, business, personal ie start with something personal like how are you, going into business and ending with something personal like hope you have a good weekend, tied into the start to show you've been listening. It doesn't have to be a half hour conversation just enough to be "nice".

Sure you'll get a reputation if you don't bother with the niceties but it's not a hanging offense.

I know it’s the narrative to dislike men on here, but you couldn’t be further from the truth.
I’m a man and so far I’ve had 2 jobs (in two companies) where this has been raised as a ‘performance issue - I just don’t get the chit chat thing either.

Hate employers for these silly rules, but don’t hate men because of the false reasoning of ‘they can get away with anything’

Exactly. It's just bad manners.

Nobody is too busy and important for good manners.

I hate chitchat too, but am always polite and never abrupt. I think there’s a difference between asking about someone’s weekend / the weather / their plans for the week etc to ‘Hi it’s xxxx how you doing? Good to hear, just a quick one, could you send me x y z, ok brilliant, thanks bye bye’. Literally takes seconds.
Im a bit of an overthinker so if someone put the phone down without saying bye, or called and just called and said ‘send me xyz’ I would think they were either a bit rude, or they didn’t like me.

I honestly wouldn’t want to ring you at work. A little bit of talk hi how are you “ what you need to talk about” thank you and a GOODBYE have a nice day/afternoon wouldn’t go a miss. God knows how you’ve not been complained about. I bet people hate ringing you.

I think a hi, how are you at the start of the call is good, if you speak to them more frequently through the day the. You don’t need to ask how are you again imo. A bye though, I couldn’t get past you not saying bye, that’s super rude for me. In films when people do that I always think ‘who on earth are they basing it on, it’s so unrealistic’ but it’s you op!! 🤣🤣

For me it’s about knowing when the chat is appropriate and useful. I know I’ll get more from some team members if I engage a bit and others (like me) aren’t as fussed with sharing details of weekend etc. We have a daily stand up for 30 mins each day, when I first joined we would use that full 30 mins even when the work stuff was complete- it blew my mind! We don’t do that anymore 🤣

I understand what you are saying about the long chats etc but you wouldn’t barge into someone’s house without being cordial even if it’s hi how are you or leave without saying goodbye so why would you do it in a phone call?

I too have a v busy post but then say things like ‘right I know we are both busy so…’ or I know you are time poor so…’ and then we crack on. Problem solved and off we both go.

I absolutely guarantee that if a man never said goodbye on the phone, just put it down abruptly he would be considered every bit as rude.

Everyone else seems to manage it 😏

You're absolutely right OP. If you were a man, they would be praising you for your no nonsense and efficient manner.

I don't really understand why you have to do all these super quick conversations by phone though? I've worked in large global organisations and as a rule, if you just want someone to send over a report, you send an email. The phone is generally to discuss something and is a way to build relationships.

So I might send an email saying, "Hi Mary, can you please send me the latest report on lip balm sales figures ahead of the meeting on Thursday, thanks, Ginger". The only reason I'd ring her would be if it was urgent or if there was more to discuss - eg if the report needed to be edited/ formatted differently. And then part of the reason to call is to persuade her to make the changes and/or do it all a lot faster. In which case, a polite call is bette.r

Also, there's a big difference between not wanting to chit chat and being rude. I'm not particularly chit chatty when I'm focused and busy, but I can say hello and goodbye.