Gushy Facebook posts

@fruitstick I’m so sorry for your loss. Ignore the nasty comments mocking those who grieve in public. Why should you keep it private? This is your life and your son you can post what you want on social media. Keep him and his memory alive.

So the affairs and the beatings don't offend you, but FB posts do?

there is a couple in our town who put gushy posts about the wonderful x number of years together she has had more affairs than i can count for a start and its known he treats her like a punch bag ok its their choice to be together however bad but fgs lets stop the hypocrisy

I think the difference is the direction of the posts. There's a massive difference in the feeling of reading "YOU are my soulmate and I love YOU my gorgeous husband" (which instantly gives a guy reaction of "Oops this is not meant for my eyes as I am a colleague from six years ago and definitely not her husband") and reading "I'm feeling over the moon today celebrating mine and my husband's anniversary. I love him so much!" (which although may be cheesy, is sharing the news outwards so nobody feels like they are being intrusive). It's all about the direction to which you are shouting the claim - to the audience watching "It's my beautiful daughters birthday today!" or to the one year old daughter herself "Happy birthday baby!". One includes the reader and one doesn't. I don't think it's about the information at all really. It's the feeling of scrolling and feeling that you are reading someone's diary or opening their post because you are seeing a public declaration geared towards an individual.

Life is too short to worry about if other people like what I write on my social media. I share many milestone posts for my baby boy and I’m happy for anyone who doesn’t like them to mute or remove me off their Facebook. I also post on our wedding anniversary and our holiday pictures too.

I also post every so often about my twin pregnancy that unfortunately ended in miscarriage, for example on should be due date or “you should be 1 today” sort of thing. I don’t really care what others say about the way I grieve, happy to be removed from your fb :)

@Theeternalrocksbeneath love everything about this

I am so sorry for the loss of your son. 💝

I actually made his daughter who was a baby at the time, a book of all his Facebook posts about her and her mom. It has pics from his page and sweet statuses. Thankfully he was a sap too, so I had all these lovely sentiments straight from him to his wife and daughter.

Truth be told it's my favourite thing I've ever done for someone. I gave a copy to his mom and sister too and included posts he'd written about them.

Couldn't agree with you more. Well said.

They clearly use it to sneer at others, to feel better about their own lives, and then they make threads on MN to sneer anonymously. How sad.

Maybe they think people who have requested/accepted being Facebook friends actually care.

What do people on this thread actually expect them to post if not their lives and relationships? I’ve read on MN people complaining about posting holidays as that’s now not reading the room about the cost of living crisis. I don’t have any SM (except this…) but this kind of thing really wouldn’t bother me. It’s nice to see others happy even if I’m not.

I'm sorry I think these posts where people pile on to sneer at people who post things on Facebook and "cringe" at people who post things in the belief that their husbands to be faithful are just the extension of the nastiest behaviour in the school playground. It's moral majority with a healthy dose of modern day Hyacinth Bouquet. Just horrible.

You're laughing at people who are being cheated on, laughing at people grieving, laughing at people who have bad taste in interior decor or who are poorer than you. And passing it all off under the guise of "they're all addicted to social media, how embarrassing". Well of course they are, as are you, or you wouldn't be posting about this. Of course there's too much showing off and narcissism on Facebook, this is a stunningly obvious observation and it doen't make you particularly clever or insightful. Why does naming and shaming particular individuals because they are sad or vulnerable and try to put their best foot forward online make you feel better about yourselves? If sneering at Jane next door for not realising her hubby is bonking his PA makes you feel good about yourself you are a genuinely horrible person.

Grow up and develop enough emotional intelligence to recognise that if someone's husband is cheating on them she is likely in denial about it and trying to convince herself as much as anyone. Let her have this small crumb of dignity without you "cringing" and sneering at her on Mumsnet.

And by the way if you're not allowed to post affection for your husband or children, not allowed to commemorate birthdays etc on Facebook, what exactly is it for? Can you share an approved lists of acceptable topics? Because God forbid that I should breach the cringe code.

@fruitstick I do think they're stupid yes, it is literally not someone's wedding anniversary if they are dead. And I don't know how "people" will think I'm mean and spiteful as I don't comment this on their posts.

I would love it if my son's friends did this. Please keep doing it.

@marblesthecat you can think they're stupid, and people will think you are mean and spiteful as evidenced by this thread.

But you do you I suppose. I know which one I'd rather be

Oh and I write posts each year about my best friend who passed 13 years ago. I like to share his memory and more importantly his mom loves them. She writes a post too. I know it makes her happy when me and our other close friends remember him.

I think k you have to separate gushy/lovey romantic posts from posts about people who've died.I lost my mum in a traumatic way and sometimes putting up a post on her birthday is my way of saying 'she was here, she existed'. I can't send a card or give a present or tell her face to face but I also don't want her birthday to slip by as though she was never here.

I think there's a big difference between that and my friend (who I've unfollowed because it was TOO much) who posts constantly about how wonderful her husband/life is, how much she adores him etc. I get it...she's happy and I'm also really pleased for her but I don't understand why she needs to constantly broadcast it.

So I think they are two different things.

❤️

I love them.
My friends are awesome, I love celebrating with them.

I sometimes gush about my ds and my partner. Heck, I gush about my dog and cats too. I love celebrating my family.

I have written mushy posts on my best friends and how thankful I am for them. I like to write and express gratitude. It works for me.

Both my son and partner are survivors of lots of trauma. Getting to brag about the incredible people they are and how lucky I am to have them in my life? Yes please.

Can I ask... All of you who seem to think it is wrong/vile/cringe to post practically any memory, occasion or photo on Facebook, what do you use FB for and what kind of posts don't you have an aversion to?

And they absolutely can write it down but other people will read it and think it's stupid, as is evident by this thread.

You sound nice.

Yes. Totally vile that people express their love for someone, whether alive or dead.

Maybe they don't care whether you want to read it, maybe they just want to write it down.

I have a relative who gushes about her twatty bellend of a husband.

He doesn't like her posts or post about her ever.

It's embarrassing.

I guess people are different hey OP. Not everyone is going to feel the same as you. Who knew? 🤷🏻‍♀️

So sorry 💛

I find it worse when people constantly change their profile picture so others can comment on how they look. It's weird!