“You are so lucky”

Just say 'thank you we feel very blessed'. Or you could go with 'not really we are saddled with a huge debt until we retire and we've worked like dogs to get here'. I'm thinking you won't get many visitors in future if you go with the latter. Personally I count myself lucky if I manage to cross the road in one piece

One person's good choice is another person's bad choice. I wouldn't forgo all fun for ten years to get a house. I'd consider a more balanced approach better, even if it then took 15 years to get a house. I've seen people prioritise financial goals then die and miss out on all the living they planned to do later, so no thanks.

If I said, "you're lucky to find this house" I mean just that. You're lucky to find it. You could have not come across that particular property or found a house with a unique feature. It might not have been on the market at just the right moment. It doesn't mean I want your house. It doesn't even mean I like your house. Even if I think it's awful I'd probably say you're lucky to find it if you love it. It's your home after all and you have to be happy with it.

You're lucky you are in a position to take a second job and you are lucky that you were able to save for it. I don't have that choice because I have a disabled child to care for. So yes, you're lucky that life has put you in that position. Not lucky to need IVF, I was lucky to never need that. We all have some luck in life, good or bad.

😂

I said elsewhere - you might have missed it - these people aren’t immediate friends in my close circle or anything.

And yet they know that you have moved house and your new address within two weeks of the move.

I think the solution is simple here. Don’t tell people who apparently aren’t your friends (and who you don’t actually like) about your private affairs. Then they won’t be able to turn up at your door uninvited. And for future reference if they do turn up, you don’t have to give them a guided tour.

That being said, I’m still not convinced that they were being as snarky as you seem to believe.

@CaptainJackSparrow85 Ha! I was going to refer to the same quote but you got there first. Great life philosophy to have

Absolutely.

I’ve also worked hard in a job that’s frequently stressful and have a nice house with a big garden to show for it. I consider myself bloody lucky.

I always think of that line from Baz Luhrmann’s ‘Sunscreen’: ‘what ever you do, don't congratulate yourself too much, or berate yourself either – your choices are half chance, so are everybody else's.’

Bad luck can make a mockery of hard work and savings as quickly as you can click your fingers

Well said.

Of course there is good luck/fortune involved. You are arrogant to assume otherwise. You've escaped ill health or a downturn in good fortune that nothing has jumped into your life to stop this achievement happening.

I really detest when people think they deserve their fortune, it is always fortuitous that you are still gaining and I have seen people floored by poor mental health (out of nowhere), poor physical health, a child born with special needs and a parent with crippling debts, all despite their own hard work and good efforts.

I am aware that my own fortune is good on the equivalent of a dice roll and not all to do with hard work and sacrifices made. Random obstacles have been surmountable and so all is well for now.

Long may you be so lucky.

"You are so lucky" basically means "how lovely, I am pleased for you". Look for nastiness in pleasant phrases and you will be unhappy

Haven't read the whole thread but wanted to say that I often say I am lucky when what I'm really saying is I'm grateful. I think if somebody is saying that you are lucky they may not be speaking about actual luck as much as to be pointing out (rather clumsily, because it doesn't suit you) that you have a lot to be thankful for, and they are pleased for you?

You're making yourself out to be a martyr.

There is a certain amount of luck involved though isn't there. You're lucky you didn't lose your job, become I'll, go through a breakup bla bla.

Body size, like wealth, is partly about luck. Of course, some people are slim because they have been very unlucky. But still, it’s not entirely about work/effort

Yes to an extent. But I think people do prefer looking for an excuse rather than admitting lack of effort.

I sometimes find large people tell me I am so lucky that I am slim. It is not luck but I do not correct them. No point really.

🤣

@SamAndEIIa I posted a photo of the new keys on Facebook (no indication of where the new house was/what the house looked like/whether we owned or rented) and someone I worked with a decade ago messaged asking when the housewarming was 🙃

This could be an example of a totally normal, not particularly funny, jokey thing that people say. Like when you say you're going on holiday and someone says 'ooh take me in your suitcase!' or you go on a first date and someone asks if they should buy a hat. They don't really mean it, it's just shit people say.

It does sound like you have a chip on your shoulder - I mean maybe the one person you felt was making snidey comments genuinely was, in which case stop socialising with that person and stop telling them your business. But somehow all these people from your OP who you implied were somehow jealous went from spending all their money on travel so not having their priorities right, to all owning property regardless due to family money. In which case who cares if they travelled? It doesn't really make sense.

I sometimes find large people tell me I am so lucky that I am slim. It is not luck but I do not correct them.

It's lucky if you have the physical ability to exercise and move, if you have no health issues that cause weight retention, if you have the money and knowledge as to how to eat healthily, and the mental ability to control what you're eating. Not everyone has those things.

Body size, like wealth, is partly about luck.
Of course, some people are slim because they have been very unlucky. But still, it’s not entirely about work/effort.

You sound a bit odd OP. Just enjoy what you have.

You sound like you want to look down on those who have made different choices to you. I wouldn't be so smug, yes you may have a decent home now, but sounds like it has come at the cost of years of not having much fun or enjoying life very much.

When I started teaching my mother was told how 'lucky' I was by her neighbour and her reply was along these lines too! The neighbour's daughter, a few years older than me, had been to the grammar school but left at 15 as she didn't like not going out most nights.

Usually it just means 'congratulations; how lovely for you'. After all, Jewish people often use 'mazel tov' (literally 'good luck') to mean 'congratulations'. Obviously, I don't know the people who are saying it, and, if they are saying it in envious or resentful tones, I could understand your being upset; but just the word wouldn't bother me.

Well, you were lucky to be born in a country or move to a country that has given you the opportunities to earn enough to buy a house, so that’s lucky. They’re not wrong.

But yes, as others have said this is a massive overthink as it’s shorthand for “how nice for you to have this lovely place”.

If it’s bothering you enough to feel it is worthy of a whole post on a social platform I will definitely say how lucky that this is your biggest problem though.

People say all kinds of crap to fill silences. It does not always mean anything.

I sometimes find large people tell me I am so lucky that I am slim. It is not luck but I do not correct them. No point really.

It's so funny that this thread is full of posters insisting that you are in fact lucky and also insisting this is just something you say which means the same as "how lovely" when your examples illustrate that it's not the same at all.

I think some people just can't accept someone else having better or equal circumstances to them. People tell me all the time I'm lucky that I "don't work". I bloody do work! But apparently being a writer and content creator doesn't count because it's something other people do for fun. Never mind that it's how I make my living...

You could paraphrase Samuel Goldwyn's quote to reply to those who say you're lucky.

...Yes, the harder we've worked and saved the luckier we've got...

I agree with @HawnyThorn that in certain circumstances you can replace lucky with fortunate and it's more appropriate..

In the case of your friends, however, OP, where they have similar incomes, health and circumstances, that would irritate me too.

They should say 'I love it, well done, I wish I had your discipline'.

Everything @Winter2020 said.