Siblings and inheritance

The thing that's been tugging at my heartstrings is that she said "mum wanted me to have it until the kids were older".

@ShawleyNot - to add to my previous post, I should have said, it is possible that your Mother never said this at all and your sister knows how to play you. IF she did say something like this, my immediate thought would be that what your Mother probably said was something along the lines of telling your sister that it would be good for her and her children, to stay with Your Mum until the children are older. Your Mum may have been thinking that she would still be around herself. And maybe your Mum was enjoying the company, and having someone around who might be able to help her as she got older? Which, sadly, is no longer the case

Your Mum didn't change her will, after all! What age was she?

DO NOT RENT - because in addition to what this poster says - you'll need to pay tax on the rent AND you have some liability for upkeep of the property.

As others say - keep it legal. She buys you out or the house gets sold.

You say you don't need the money. I think it's a bit shit to kick your sister and her family out for pure financial gain.

Do you have children?

The question then is how it gets to the market, if the sister says I don't want to sell my half, then it can't be marketed as no estate agent will touch it. It also potentially devalues the OPs half to £0 notionally as it can't be sold.

The remedy in that case is for the OP to go to court for an "order for sale" which would force the sister to sell her chunk, unless of course she makes a convincing counter argument, even if ordered to leave she could play it out until eviction, and realistically it can't be marketed if you have someone refusing to leave as it won't conveyance unless the buyer is willing to accept the sitting resident and costs to get them out.

If neither sister lived in the house the situation would be much, much simpler - as it stands she is in residence, she might leave if asked nicely, or she could wait it out and it will be a court decision.

Sorry you lost your Mum, OP.

It must be a terrible blow for your sister, but that is the circumstance she found herself in and the risk of moving into your Mum’s house.

What is your own living situation? Your DSis is being outrageous if she thinks it OK for you to rent a home while she lives rent and mortgage free in a house that was willed to both of you!

You say your half would be a good deposit so I assume you don’t currently own? There are significant disadvantages to you should you choose to rent your half to your DSis. You would lose your first time buyer advantages (stamp duty relief) when you did come to buy, and as the house is not your residence you would be liable for Capital Gains Tax when / if you sell.

So I would say tactfully but calmly to your DSis and BIL that now they have jobs etc they could look at buying you out, or say ‘if we sell we can both get the deposit and head start on the houses that suit us best’.

Tell her you know it is a wrench for her because she has lived in the house but your Mum treated you both equally and you can’t let your own family rent while she stays.

But don’t start pushing practicalities or rushing her yet. Nothing can happen til you have probate anyway.

I am so sorry about your Mum @ShawleyNot

I do, however, think this shouldn't wait until after the funeral, to see a solicitor. Where is the original Will ( not a plain copy, but the original)? This matters - and even more importantly, who is the Executor? If a solicitor is the Executor, there is unlikely to be a problem, because the Solicitor will be dealing with the Will and will do so exactly as the will stipulates. If your sister has the original Will AND she is sole Executor, then you really need to see a Solicitor as soon as you can.

Unfortunately, inheritance after a death causes major, long-term relationship problems, within families, far more often than you might realise. My sister went into my Mum's House and helped herself to many things she wanted, even although I was the Executor and asked her not to, because I had the responsibility of making sure some of the (possibly valuable) books and paintings were properly accounted for, and the gifts listed in my Mother's Will went to the right people

Please, please -I know how hard it is when you are dealing with a death of a loved one, already - but speak to a Solicitor as soon as possible

Get legal advice immediately. Depending on the value of the property there may actually mean that there is inheritance tax to pay as well and it might not be as simple as your sister buying you out.

I am so sorry for your loss but equally if not more sorry that you are being put in this awful situation by your sister. It is very telling that she has already laid out her cards! I disagree with another poster who said to leave it a few weeks. I suggest nipping it in the bud immediately.

@frozencarlotta

Starting point would be 50/50 between living children

I would just say that you stick to the will. Say you'll get three independent valuations, pick the middle one and she can buy your half of that. Otherwise it goes on the market.

If only things were as simple as some posts in this thread seem to suggest. You need to see a solicitor and get legal advice in order to make sure you get your argument in line first and potentially avoid a problematic situation.

Your DS is already in residence, the title of the house will pass to both of you as tennants in common on the land registry, split 50/50 unless otherwise stipulated.

If your sister refused to move you could go to court for an order for sale, which is normally granted unless your sister made a good argument against.

If she engages a solicitor they would likely be looking to see if there is a case for proprietary estoppel in her favour.

This would require her to demonstrate that a promise was made to her (which can be verbal, not written), that she acted in some way to her detriment, financially or otherwise by living there (ie did she provide care/support during covid) and did she come to rely on that promise.

Its then up to a judge to rule on the case, this may be over-riding the will and granting her the property, or leaving it 50/50 but giving her leave to remain, rent free or at an agreed rent. or of course finding against and making an order for sale.

She is resident in the house, and owns half of it, so any idea of asking her to naff off is naive unless she is not that clued up herself.

You just have to hope that she can be persuaded to do so before talking to a halfway competent solicitor, otherwise its the long haul!!

Seek legal advice and tell her so.

She's purposely making sure she gains whilst you miss out on what you're entitled to.

Even if she destroys the will, won't the starting point be 50/50 to each sister?

(Not a lawyer/solicitor)

Don't get into a renting situation OP. Who would pay for house maintenance costs? How would you manage a dispute if you have different views on the nature or scope of work or who to use to carry it out? What if your sister refuses to pay for maintenance costs? What if your sister says she'll handle this side of things and then expects to have the house upgraded in ways to suit her with you paying half?

Renting could be a nightmare.

I'd say a hard no to renting. I've seen at least two bad situations on here where the sibling in the house; 1) stopped paying rent, or 2) wouldn't move out later when financial situation changed for the sibling. Plus it'll be preferential rent, an expectation that you pay to do up her house etc etc. Deal with the problem once only by selling her your half. If she won't buy it, that's on her. If they can't afford a mortgage then they.wouldn't be able to afford the rent either.

Half the house is yours.
She can get a mortgage to buy your house out, or she can move out and take half the money from the sale, or if you want to become a landlord you can rent her your half - but you're under no obligation to do so.
Full stop.

she is insisting that mum wanted her to have it and live in it and we can't sell it.

if that were the case, it would have been left solely to her.

This. She is basically stealing from you and expecting you to suck it up. It's not any action you take that is going to ruin your sibling relationship, it's her unreasonable behaviour in demanding you give your share of your mum's assets to her.

I suggest you put this in legal OP. I'm not sure that the majority of responses are correct. As one PP points out there are Dependency arguments that can be made sometimes even if the Will does say 50/50.

I’m so very sorry for your loss.

Under U.K. law, anyone who makes a will has to appoint at least one executor to carry out the instructions and handling of the estate.

”An executor is legally responsible for carrying out the instructions in the person's will and handling their estate. Someone's 'estate' is everything they own – including their money, property and possessions.”

When you are ready, and if you are finding the thought of any confrontation with your sister unpleasant, refer her to the executor rather than get involved directly. The executor should have not emotional involvement in the process and just act according to your mother’s instructions, not what your sister considers fair or what she feels her personal entitlement is. Your sister has every right to contest the will, but unless she feels the will was signed under any duress or can prove your mother wasn’t in sound mind when she wrote it, she’s on pretty shaky ground. A 50/50 split would be viewed as very reasonable and very standard so it would be quite exceptional for a court to overrule in her favour based on what you’ve said.

Even better if your mother appointed a bank or solicitor as an executor as it makes the process even more business like, but even if she didn’t, the role is still as responsible and carries as much weight whether it’s an individual or an institution.

I had a similar situation with a step sister who challenged my mother’s will (her father’s second wife) The law made it quite clear that my parent’s will was very specific and she didn’t have a legal leg to stand on just because she felt the distribution was unfair. She received a very fair settlement but wanted much more, ‘not for her, but for her children’ despite me also having children!

So in your sisters opinion your mum wanted her to have the house and you to get nothing. Because that is essentially what she’s saying. She can keep the house. But she needs to buy you out of your half. Absolute CF

It’s awful you’re dealing with this as well as the loss of your mum, which is horrible on its own.
We’ve been through similar. It’s awful but a lawyer sorted it out. We are now NC with sibling as they behaved so badly throughout. Death and money make people do some very strange things.

Op I’m so sorry about your mum.

I just want you to know that it is possible for beneficiaries of a Will to enter into what is called a deed of agreement to vary how assets of a will are distributed. If your sister seeks legal advice she will probably be told this.
This often happens where a child is left out of the will and the other siblings want to make it fair and give that child part of the assets. And it only happens when all the beneficiaries agree

I do not think you should do this. You clearly had a good relationship with your mum and although she may have wished your sister to stay in the house, I do not believe that she would want this at your expense. I’d tell your sister that you want to follow the provisions of the Will but are happy for her to buy your share of the house. Your sister is probably highly emotional right now as she is worried about losing the home she lives in. Hopefully she calms down and realises how unfair she is being

You should agree a fair rent and your sister pay you half of this pcm until you get your inheritance.

This. If they are both working then they can easily get a mortgage to buy half of the house. They should get a decent mortgage rate became they will half as deposit. That money will then come to you. You need to get 3 estate agents in to value the house and use the mean figure. OP I know your sister is living there but you are entitled to half of the things in the house if you want them. Your sister needs to learn to share.

Your sister has wasted no time at all has she? Already mentioned this to you when your mum has only just died this week.

Unless your sister can afford to buy you out the most straightforward solution is to sell and split the proceeds of sale. Then you go your separate ways.

It will undoubtedly cause a massive fallout so be prepared and stay calm

So sorry for your loss, it's so hard losing a parent. I'm in a similar situation to you having lost Mum in May and issues about her house causing untold stress and rifts. The family has been ripped apart.

💐

I'm sure your mum would have wanted your sister to stay but also for you to have your half.

In which case I would give your sister the opportunity to take out a mortgage to buy you out of your half. Is this feasible?

If she cannot afford to buy you out then it will have to be sold.

Your mum had ample opportunity to change the will if she wanted your sister to stay in the house.