Tradwives

It sounds horrendous. May I ask how you got out of it?

I find it interesting. Mainly because I've always loved the idea of being a tradwife.

Escapism I guess as I am the main breadwinner and feel very weighed down with responsibilities and feel guilty and not being a good enough mum / work too much.

So from that point of view I'm very intrigued and love the idea of it.

But I have seen a couple of these young trade wives. And I always find it so jarring that they got married and popped out multiple kids so young.

I grew up in this life. Women could have jobs but their priority was to their home and family. Women should be dressed modestly, on Sundays it had to be a skirt to the knee. Hair long and head must be covered at church. Women were not allowed to speak during a service..if there was to be a report on the work Women were doing they would write it down and their husbands would read it out to the church. Men were also welcoming at the door and did all the finance/admin. Women were involved in the cleaning and preparing food and teaching Sunday school/creche. Bimonthly teaching meetings on headship and modesty and purity.

I don't know whether all those on insta are playing at it but the girls I know certainly aren't. Many women I know were engaged from university and had children as soon as they were married and that has been their role ever since. A good friend of mine won't leave the house even for 30 minutes without asking her DH, if we are out for a walk and I asked her to grab a coffee after she would phone him and he often says no she needs to be back for the children.

Whilst these Women have had the freedoms given by feminists of the past using those freedoms is not always possible. Most people I grew up with do not vote. They all socialise solely within church settings so there is very little outside influence. If they were to leave their marriage they would be 'read out' of their church and have no further fellowship with them (their friends and family). They would have very little ability to afford to leave because they would have so few earning opportunities due to very little employment history.

Oh I see, you're a troll.

@Tradwife360 is clearly trolling. Nobody is really that obtuse.

I don't really care if people want to live this lifestyle as long as they can pay for it, but I do feel desperately sorry for their children.

Being a SAHM wouldn't get many Instagram views.
Stick on the label tradwife and boom! loads of cash.
Call me cynic but how many do this little speech and act on tiktok then get ready for work.

@Donewithrenovating can you say who it is? I'm intrigued!

Rightly or wrongly this really annoys me. As per pp, if these women HAD to live like this I’m sure they’d have very different views on it. In the meantime, at what point does this movement start to impact the rest of us women? How does it impact the lens through which we’re viewed in the workplace? Surely men whose needs are prioritised at home will come to carry that sense of entitlement and misogyny through into other areas of their lives?

Spot on

I understood this tradwife bollocks is a far-right subculture, mirroring the “wholesome” aryan family stuff the ole Nazi’s got up to

Are you joking? Work is easy? Maybe if it's utterly mindless but most jobs aren't. I wouldn't call being the main breadwinner easy.

😂

Oh dear me @tradwife "I put it in quotation marks as women put their children into full time childcare for this career when they really are irreplaceable to their children.
And I do believe I am irreplaceable to my husband.. don’t you believe in true love anymore?? Maybe if you spent more time in the kitchen you would.".

I'm 23 years into my relationship with my husband, I know he loves me and I love him. I cook maybe 10 times a year.

We both work full time, my DD is an amazing, happy, intelligent, social, funny 9yr old who is completely aware that we love her more than anything.

I am irreplaceable to my DD, that doesn't mean that she needs to be physically in my presence 24 hrs a day. Children do not need their parents to be their ever present slaves in order to feel loved and supported.

And I do believe I am irreplaceable to my husband.. don’t you believe in true love anymore??

This doesn't make sense & you're clearly trolling but I'm bored!

Kitchen? Are your drugging him? That’s not true love. 😂

What do you mean by true love? Love between partners isn’t ever unconditional. That doesn’t exist.

I am irreplaceable to my kids. Even now and one of them is an adult. My adult dd and I are very close. Same with my teen Ds.

I also have a career. And I can cook! So can Dp though.

That’s nice dear

and all those husbands replacing their middle aged wives when they get to middle age are just a figment of our imagination 🙄

I put it in quotation marks as women put their children into full time childcare for this career when they really are irreplaceable to their children.
And I do believe I am irreplaceable to my husband.. don’t you believe in true love anymore?? Maybe if you spent more time in the kitchen you would.

I don't even know where to start with this.

Both parents put their children into childcare. If the father didn't like it, he could stay at home and care for them.

Fathers are also irreplaceable to their children.

The world is full of women who believed they were irreplaceable to their husbands, and then they found out they weren't. I know that sounds a bit cynical, but I'm not really that cynical generally, and I'm very happily married - I just don't believe anyone is irreplaceable, except for loving parents.

I don't even know what to say to your kitchen comment, other than that I'm sort of starting to think you might actually just be taking the piss of tradwives. We'd all believe in true love more if we spent more time in the kitchen?? What, because if we whip up enough apple pies our husbands would truly love us and never leave?

I'd quite like a domestic servant tradwife! Either sex, I shan't be bothering him/her for That Sort Of Thing.

Do their servile aspirations still hold good if I'm broke, or is it actually a career choice?

I put it in quotation marks as women put their children into full time childcare for this career when they really are irreplaceable to their children.

Why aren't fathers irreplaceable to their children?

I put it in quotation marks as women put their children into full time childcare for this career when they really are irreplaceable to their children.
And I do believe I am irreplaceable to my husband.. don’t you believe in true love anymore?? Maybe if you spent more time in the kitchen you would.

I think there are always anomalies to the rules, but most women who’s husbands are at home don’t seem to actually respect them or find them attractive.

This. Plus there is a picture of her on the beach with her new husband the day after the wedding and she looks shell shocked.

Bearing in mind there’s fairly credible evidence (from a woman who claims she had sex with him plus his preferred CSA material) that Josh Duggar likes really rough / degrading sex and she would have been told she could never say no to him sexually or she would go to hell, I have no doubt her wedding night (and subsequent marriage) was a nightmare.

If she’s doubled down by clinging to her religion (which says she must trust and obey her husband), bearing in mind she has no education (‘homeschooling’ in the US has almost no checks - she’s minimally educated) and no options, I find it hard to blame her.

Josh’s sister Jill (who has pretty much got out of the cult due to marrying a man who actually seems to care about her) has a book coming out shortly and was in a recent documentary - she gives a lot of inside information about the level of brainwashing that goes on.

Why have you put career in quotation marks? Is a career only genuine if a man has it?

Also just an FYI, you're not irreplaceable to your husband.

I am genuinely happy for anyone who enjoys their life, finds it fulfilling, and has found a partner who feels the same. I don't doubt that you think it's the best way to live your life, and that you have no wish to change it. But your last sentence (like most blanket statements) is absolute bullshit. How do you account for stay at home dads? Are they all bullied/coerced into it rather than it being their choice, and secretly miserable and wishing they could trade places with their wives?

I hope you’re never replaced…