Getting changed at school - expecting too much?

You could adapt one shirt for PE and swim days. Sew the buttons on to the right side and then add velcro along the usual button space if that makes sense so that it's easy to do up.

4 year olds take forever to get changed, it's not unusual for it to take 10-15 mins at the start of the year they soon get quicker.

As for drying herself at the end of the day it's not the end of the world if she doesn't do a good job you can sort her out when she gets home just send socks instead of tight.

I taught reception for 10 years.

You are doing exactly the right thing by practising with her.
10 minutes is fantastic timing and she will get faster very quickly.

The teachers are used to children who take ages to get changed and will be very pleased that you are working with your dd to make her more independent.

Keep going with the practise. Just because it's difficult and a bit slow now, don't give up. By Christmas, she'll be doing it all in a flash.

I'd out money on her not being the slowest/least able to get herself changed.

If she is just going back to school for after school club then she shouldn't need to put the tights back on. So she could put socks or leggings on instead. I would also argue that she could wear whatever is easiest at that point because she's not actually in taught school time. They might allow her to change into PE kit instead if it's more straightforward.

Why do private schools make things more difficult

What's wrong with a simple white polo shirt esp for 4yr

Rather then buttons - then the cost of having a red stripe

Guessing you can't buy 5 shirts for £5/6 from Asda like we can 🥲

It's in the efes for. Child to learn to dress their selves by self before /after pe

Our school did this in reception twice a week so go in uniform and get changed

Yes it takes as long to get changed as the actual pe lesson

In yr 1 and above they go in pe stuff twice a week so then actually only need 3 sets of uniform

I have gone in and helped as a mum but I had to show them my dbs (have one anyway as I'm a maternity nurse)

But all helpers have to have a dbs

Do uou know any parents who you can ask if they can help your child and theirs if going

I put on our wats app group that I was helping and did any mums want me to help their child - this was when had a party /disco at school ans had to get changed

Think 4/5 out of the 30 said yes please to help for their child

All you can do is really practise buttons over the summer holidays

And maybe socks those days to put on after if struggling with tights

Teachers will help as they can't leave without her and will be on a time limit to get back to school

Its still an option, my husband had a disability that means he simply can’t do buttons, so everytime he buys a new shirt I just cut the buttons off and sew them on the side of the shirt they’d be on when the shirt is done up, I then sew velcro where the buttons used to be, and behind the new placement of the buttons. She could also wear socks on swimming days, that would help.

Ah ok. We weren’t supervised in the changing rooms. The TA brought the children and collected them and the class teacher remained in the class with the remaining pupils. Class of 30 divided into 3 for the first couple of years then in half… I appreciate in private prep, there could be fewer than 15 to a class so may all go together.

Teach her to undo the top maybe 2 buttons and get her blouse on and off like a t shirt.

Tights are difficult if you're still a bit damp - can she wear socks instead?

Hiya,

I teach reception and 10 mins is nothing honestly, try not to worry. We factor in ALOT of extra time to get changed because it is a nightmare at the beginning getting them all ready, it is like a military operation but they get there in the end! The best thing you can do is practise with her with a bag so that when she takes each thing off she puts it in her bag so she has everything together and that everything has her name on (We always end up with a pile of unidentified clothes after PE and a few wanderers who seem to drop different items all around the room haha!) It sounds like she's doing great though and they will be expecting them to need alot of help at this point x

I have taken similar age groups swimming. We do encourage parents to practise getting changed with their children as of course it is so much easier if the children can dry themselves and dress independently. But many will need a bit of help with something - buttons, tights, drying hair. You said she can do it herself but takes a long time of about ten minutes - this does not sound like a long time to me and I'd be delighted if they could all do that!

I would definitely send socks to put on after swimming rather than tights. Is there another parent who could ask to help her who you know if they were going to get their child? I know it sounds a big ask but they will become independent very quickly by doing it weekly. I agree with poster above - young boys often take far longer than girls on these situations!

Experiment with only undoing the top 1 or two buttons and pulling the shirt over her head.

I have arthritis, buttons are a nightmare. You can also get a button hook but not sure a 4 year old would remember to take it with her.

I think I'd send in a pair of socks to wear after swimming, let the teacher know that they are there as an option.

We do PE with Reception from week 1 and they are expected to change themselves; all 30 of them! It’s run like a military operation with instructions and all the children doing the same thing eg take off your shoes, put your shoes on your chair, take off your jumper, put your jumper on your shoes etc.

Make sure EVERYTHING is named including underwear on swimming days. Ditch the tights on swimming days for socks. Four year olds can sort themselves out when they have to.

My 7 year old would struggle with that.

You could buy and install velcro strips in the blouse.

Or teach DD to only open the top two buttons and take it off/ put it on over her head.

I think the school are being daft about the changing though. In the private (US) elementary school my DCs went to, they let the students wear their PE clothes to school for kindergarten (age 5-6) and 1st grade (age 6-7). The amount of time saved was astronomical.

In particular, getting into tights for ballet is a ridiculous expectation for a class of 4 yos to manage on their own. Could your DD wear leggings or would that be just as fiddly as tights?

10 minutes seems within the realms of normal for a four year old – remember there’s bound to be someone slower, even if only the away with the fairies ones who forget what they’re meant to be doing and get distracted.

The parents are unlikely to be DBS checked. They'll be supervised by the school staff as per the risk assessment.

Part of the EYFS framework is to get changed independently. Keep preserving and she will be fine.

They shouldn’t expect your dd to do it entirely herself. Changing independently is part of the early years curriculum so it’s good that they have plenty of opportunity to practice.

Tights are a struggle for many children even well into year one. All you can do is keep practicing. They won’t abandon your dd while she’s getting changed and they’ll just have to wait.

I should add, the boys were worse at organising themselves. Some boys would literally stand there expecting to be dressed. Well done for trying to get your dd up to speed.

If swimming is last lesson, does your dd really need to put her tights back on on swim days? Idk how strict the school is about uniform.

If other parents are there to help their kids and in the changing room, they will be dbs checked. Hopefully they will also help the other children. When dd did swimming at her former state primary, they insisted on 2 parent helpers, one for each changing room. If they didn’t have enough helpers, swimming didn’t run. I helped several times and the children needed quite a lot of help. I also tidied and put clothes the right way round etc whilst they were in the pool as things get jumbled up. We still had to pay a nominal amount for lessons btw.

I get some parents with children at private schools would be pretty annoyed if mandatory helping were introduced. You’ll probably have a parents WhatsApp group sooner or later. You can share your thoughts with the other parents on there and ask for advice.

She really won't be the only one, don't worry!

M&S do blouses and shirts that are entirely Velcro behind the buttons - you would have no clue it's not a "normal" shirt! Was an absolute godsend for my 4yr old who is also expected to wear a shirt (and tie!) from reception at her state school!!

Does she need to go to after school club on swim day?