To feel utterly heartbroken over a home.

Have you looked at air bnb ?

Now you know you need somewhere for longer can you find somewhere temporary back in your home area? Ask on local Facebook groups for house sitting? A temporary short rent?

OP, what are the the terms of your exchange of contract? I hope there is a log stop date?
IMO Your solicitor should have looked after you here and made sure that a long stop completion date did not go past your mortgage offer.

Buying is always so stressful, fingers crossed that all goes smoothly from now on.

Game face on and just be calm and secure around your Dd.

It sounds really tough for you all. But your daughter is absolutely taking her cues from you and reacting this way because of what she's picking up from you and your husband and what she's overheard or seen, not because she's moving house at two years old, so reframe your thinking about it, at least in front of her. There's no need for her to be so distressed that she's crying for hours - she's 2 years old, as long as she has her parents with her and she's somewhere safe and warm, that's what matters.

I hope things look up for you soon

I can’t add anything but you have not been stupid. This is not your fault, it’s just the circumstances. I hope DD settles and things improve for you soon.

I really feel for you. You have done the best with the hand you e been dealt. It will get better.

Spot on. Focus on getting her sleeping space as close to home as possible - same bedding, toys etc. You have to model
positivity no matter how worried you are. Get the mortgage sorted out and start planning regarding the new house. Spin it as well as you can for her.

Make it exciting staying at granny's. She'll follow your lead, if you're sad and anxious she will be too. Tell her about her new house, that you can stay in forever and is being built specially for you.

I completely get why you are stressed and upset - our landlord has just given us a few months notice they intend to sell and with increased house prices and rents it looks like we’ll have to move out of our village. But your daughter is 2 years old - I suspect some of her stress has been picked up from your distress. Better to make a game of things for her - ie isn’t it fun we are going on a sleep over at relatives house and we can do X.

You haven't been stupid, you have done really well. The part ownership of a house, will be a much more secure position, as you never have to worry about the landlord selling up, or being evicted for other reasons that are not your fault. A relative of mine made a similar move a couple of years ago, and is so happy to have security at last.
It is ridiculous that there are not a lot more of these arrangements on new houses, as it could help so many people.

P.S Not having a mortgage offer in place while you have exchanged puts you in a very perilous position. I'm sure you know this, but this is why I think you need to start looking at the mortgage options as a priority.

Did you use a mortgage advisor? Could be a good idea to help reduce some of the stress?

I'm sorry I have no advice for your situation with your DD. Our move was firstly at 11 months into our parents while the house was built and then into our new house at 22 months, so he probably didn't even notice.

Your pain is compounded by many things all happening at the same time. One pain to try to jettison is the mortgage difficulty.

"also mortgage offer expires in December if we go past that date either mortgage will cost us more then we can afford or we lose our deposite and become penniless"

Have you already checked to see if you can get a mortgage offer extension?

"We have a clause that says if not complete for 6 months after the set completion date we can pull out without any repercussions."

Would the 2 month delay push you past this?
Our long stop date was fast approaching and suddenly our house was ready just in the nick of time. Like 2 weeks before or something. (How interesting hmm builders?) I'm not sure if we would have wanted to pull out though given the time/emotional investment we'd put in. Also house prices and mortgage rates had risen in the meantime, and with the cost of storing our stuff, solicitors fees etc it didn't make much sense to start the whole process again. We loved the house so that helped us make our decision. We'd also been living with my parents for 10 months by this point, about 6 or 7 more than we were expecting when we exchanged, so we were very ready to move out.

Moving house is very stressful and every move brings it's own pain and challenges.
I can totally see how all this is hard especially as it wasn't you who wanted to move in the first place. Everything that is going wrong probably just makes you grieve for your old house more. Sending hugs, but you can get through this and nothing is your fault.

Why do you think you have been stupid? None of this is your fault, lovely.
I have been in a similar situation- a long drawn out one. I sympathise massively.
I thought my heart would break having to leave a greatly loved home for many years through no fault of my own.
I remember the stress of not knowing what on earth I was going to do and how it was affecting my dc's and my heart goes out to you.
All I can say is to keep routine as normal as possible, try to keep a brave face on around the children, and just believe it will work out. Keep your eyes open for every option around you in the meantime.
I can honestly say that as it turned out for us, in the long term it actually turned out to be a good thing and while my old home will always be special to me and hold so many memories, we are in a more suitable situation now.
Hang in there and trust that one day you will be on the other side of this, and your dd will be fine .

Awww.. so sorry you are feeling this way OP. You r right in the thick of it at the moment and missing your home, but you will have a home again soon. Hang in there.

Your daughter will pick up her cues from you. So if you are sad and stressed about the move, she will be too. If you can, you need to turn things around - talk about how exciting the new adventure is. When she asks about going home, say in a v excited voice that you will soon have a new home and she will have the best ever bedroom and how it's all exciting! Talk about this temporary house stay as a holiday and how fun it is. It might be a bit late now as you've already shown you r sad. But if you can, try to turn it around. If you say, and show, it's all and adventures and v exciting, that's how your daughter will feel. If you says it's all terrible and cry, that's what your daughter will do. Fake great and cry in secret. 💐💐

💐

Sounds like you're doing an amazing job. Things do happen in life, show your dd that it's ok to feel upset and that there are positives. Ie her toys are family are with her, the good stuff about where she is now. She has an opportunity to build resilience.

Can you go somewhere nice today to distract you all? There is nothing you can do practically today so go out and try to have some fun and take your mind away from this for a few hours

What an upsetting day for you all. I an empathise we moved when our DS1 was just over two, we were upsizing andI think the size of the new home and seeing it without our things in was just too overwhelming for for him, he kept saying, .I like my old house, I want to go back to my old house. He settled very, quickly once we were settled there, so try not to worry it will be ok.

We stayed in that house for 18 years. When we downsized and relocated a couple of years ago he was the same, he just doesn’t like change.

My advice would be to get the toddlers bedroom looking nice, go to the local park, shops etc so she can get familiar with the new place. Before you know it the old home will be quickly forgotten.

Good luck with your move, sorry it hasn’t gone as smoothly as you hoped, but you will get there OP.

It sounds really stressful but beyond your control. Your child will take her lead from you and her dad. Fine to commiserate with how she feels, sad leaving the house etc but you are all waiting for the new house and show her how to cope and adapt while waiting.

We had a house fire and had to leave for a year. We lived with relatives for a month (an hour commute to school) then had temporary rented accommodation which ended up lasting 10months. Now we have moved back. Ds managed it all fine. He handled it amazingly. Once your dd gets through first few days I'm sure it will be fine. Kids are pretty good at adapting. Just try to keep her routines where you can so she has some consistency.

OP, I’m so sorry you’re dealing with this.Take DD to some places of her interest if you can, activities, do stuff with her. Don’t lie to her,you can’t come back to „her” house. It will get better but it’s hell dealing with inconsolable child.
Sometimes it’s impossible to reason with children as young as your DD. Tell her you’re sorry but she will have her own bedroom again (difficult without a date)

Sales rep is rat bag- at least twice pushed the dates. Pull out after 6 months without repercussions is a joke. I hope this is 6 months from the date you signed the papers.

Contact the mortgage provider and find out what your options are for extending the deal as at the moment you might not have the offer when the house is ready.

In the meantime start looking elsewhere-in a radius of whatever miles you’re able to cover commute.

Good luck