Have you ever overheard people talking about you?

While I’m sorry for anyone who gets bitched about behind their back (it’s just happened to me hence me searching for this old thread), I am loving all the stories about bitches getting confronted with their bitchitude.

I was in the loo at work. Had only been there for a month or so. Anyway, three women from the office came in and started talking about me. About how my short hair obviously meant I was a lesbian, that I was 'clearly bulimic' and 'I'd like to know how she can afford her own house'. At which point, I came out of the cubicle and advised them that my Dad had left me money. Their faces! After that, I went in for a lot of 'competitive eating' in the office (I'm a scrawny, lanky fucker, they were of the 'I can't, I'm trying to be good' ilk and it was one of those places where cakes and croissants were brought in daily) and made sure to describe just how delicious it all was! 'I just love your wife's apple pie, her pastry is always so buttery and crisp!'.

Bless you, I wouldn't take it personally. We all need our own space, and houseshares can be testing even with the best of people! I can really enjoy someone's company and still be glad when they've gone.

Not something I'm proud of but when I was in a houseshare at uni, I read my flatmate's diary. She'd written one Friday, " thank god Arschgeige is going home for the weekend". Serves me right for betraying her trust but the comment cut me. I'd always thought I'd been a good housemate and not a person someone was glad to see the back of for a few days. I'd never do something like that again so I guess something good came out of it but it still hurts when I think of it

Another mum accidentally put a message about me and my parenting skills in a group chat for a sports club our kids go to. She deleted it, but not before I spotted it and made a joke that now I knew there was a secret sub group as she’d obviously meant to put it there instead.

I probably made it worse as then this drew attention to the deleted message notification which would have been otherwise ignored. I didn’t really care but I was surprised as the mum who did it always makes a big show of not being into gossip, making out she doesn’t know things that are going in etc, so it did make me see her differently.

@IHopeYouStepOnALegPiece I'm so sorry your "friend" was such a despicable shit. I hope you have friends you deserve now

You saying this (and an earlier PP something similar) has reminded me that my father did the same. Usually at dinnertime, he would refer to "the child" and talk about me in the third person (right up until I left home at 18), and I'd remind him that I did have a name and was sitting at the table with him, but it made no difference. Not much fun at the time and, in retrospect, very weird!

I had a daft one at school, sort of the opposite of this thread. I joined some pals in the canteen queue at lunchtime and overheard them saying how good I was at French (the lesson that had just ended; it was my best/favourite subject). I joined them and acted all bashful, saying it was just because we'd been camping there over the summer so I'd picked up quite a bit. They looked really embarrassed and said "Er, we weren't actually talking about you." The fact that I remember this literally half a century later just shows how much my toes must have curled.

Agreed. Unfortunately I find most workplace colleagues to be like this. You seem lovely, never change.

Get rid of them from Facebook I did similar. Felt great to never see their posts again!

Yeah, I have heard the boss slagging me off for no particular reason at a casual job (basically the thing was impossible for me to do without any information that I tried to prise out of my unwilling boss) I'd forgotten something and had to go back for it before leaving. I quit the next business day. Good riddance I say.

sounds like my mum

@MySugarBabyLove I'm so sorry. There are many cruel AND stupid people in this world and it sounds like a lot of them went to your school. Don't let it affect the rest of your life.
My mum always says: "The people who mind, don't matter. The people who matter, don't mind."

Ahh there always one.

I wouldn’t say anything obvious to her, just be the better person and that will be obvious to everyone else :)

it is weird when you hear people talk about, I remember being in the garden and I’m not sure which neighbour was having a bbq (we are terraced houses) but they were talking about me, who is she , how many kids. What’s her name… I continued to paint my wall outside as this went on 😂

Yes it’s happened to me. We moved to a new area and my child joined the local rugby club. I didn’t know anyone and one mum introduced herself to me and we would chat occasionally (during matches). She knows everyone there and one day I happened to be standing next to her and overheard her say to another parent “why do new parents always think I want to speak to them? I have enough friends thank you very much” and then she laughed. I was the only new parent at the time. I felt my body go cold and never spoke to her again.

Not long after we first met, overheard DH's friend ask him what it was like to go out with someone so good looking. Annoyingly DH mumbled a reply and I didn't hear him.

As they got to the door, I heard the dad turn round and say, "oh my God, she's such a minger!"
@MrsMcisaCt

Wow how old was the Dad, 13? I'm so sorry that you had to hear that from such a disgustingly misogynistic man. If that's the first thing he can think to say after his daughter's just got a glowing school report, he must have some severe unresolved issues about himself

I regularly hear a group of women backstab another & when she joins them, they effusively greet…

I’ve noticed the neurodiverse get disproportionally singled out & anyone slightly cowed & vulnerable. There were ‘piled on’ at school & sometimes became shells, sadly, over time & then some adults smell blood/weakness & pile on again.

What do they say? Small minds discuss people, bigger ones, ‘concepts, things’.

I notice a senior manager at work, he attacks the ‘weaker man’ as Taylor Swift says ;) And the lyrics of the great woman’s ‘Mean’ come to mind as I reflect on my own life I am very glad to say & now I regard these ‘attackers’ with curiosity & feel rather sad on their behalf, not mine.

Yes I've heard people talk about my partner probably not realising I could hear, or that I was his partner/wife.
I let them know and made them squirm for sure.

I started a new job in and had to book appointments over the phone, this one woman wanted an appointment so I was very polite to her while I tried to find an available appointment. As these were home visits, my company liked to keep them local and grouped to save time & money, fair enough. I was perhaps a few minutes trying to find a few appointment times but of course she couldn’t do any of them. I suggested the best course of action was to get back to her once I’d moved a few appointments around.. I had the phone still to my ear, she thought I’d hung up and proceeded to tell her husband how thick I was! Not as thick as you love, you can’t hang up. So I waited on the line until she realised she was still on the phone.. needless to say there was a huge gasp when she realised 🤣

@Cooroo - perfect! You’ve made want to revisit Trollope now.

Not talking about me but I did have an email about me sent to me once. I managed to forward it to myself before the original one was recalled. And then sent both the email and the recall notice to HR.

I am so sorry @MrsMcisaCt . Can't imagine how that must have felt. 😞

I'm sorry that happened to you @MrsMcisaCt Unlikely his daughter got her kindness or politeness from him. 🌹

I was doing parents' evening for my Year 2 class. A mum and dad came in and I spoke to them for 10 minutes about their wonderful daughter. She really was a star - polite, kind, great at reading etc. I finished and they both looked happy, we said goodbye. As they got to the door, I heard the dad turn round and say, "oh my God, she's such a minger!". The mum slapped him on the arm, and looked around at me horrified, in case I had heard, then she practically pushed him down the corridor. I was so hurt. I know I'm not pretty, I have mirrors. Then I had to smile and ask the next set of parents to come in. I cried when I got home.