DD's uni costs

Don't be that parent! I self funded uni. I also was only entitled to the basic grant. I got a job at a supermarket. I'd never consider asking my parents for money.

I didn't say otherwise. I was countering the point that other students will look upon OP’s DD unfavourably if she isn't living on a low budget as a student. They won't as many of them will also be living on quite a high budget in that priced accommodation.

Yes you did misinterpret - I was saying the same thing.
Of course, being wealthy doesn't mean that you have to spend money like water. There are plenty whose parents set a budget. They're unlikely to be those living in £350 a week halls though and keeping up with these people is the opposite of what OP was supposedly tying to instill at the start of the thread anyway.

I was also trying to point out the distinction between being well-off and wealthy (well maybe people have different terms).

To me well-off is something financially achievable for 'ordinary' people. Maybe professionals or tradies for example. A lot of even more ordinary people made a big profit from downsizing, thanks to the massive increase in house prices over the past 2 decades or so.

'Wealthy' is much harder to achieve and means multimillionaire' level...many of these people spend without thinking. They don't really have to...

@Astsjakksmso Sorry! I’ve probably misinterpreted what you said. Wealthy people do subsidise a lot. But the grandparents appear pretty wealthy on the face if it.

@Astsjakksmso Thsts not really true though. The DD has one of the most expensive student flats she can get!!! She has all of that paid by her grandparents. To put it in context £350 a week for 42 weeks is £14,700. If it’s 50 weeks as some flats are in London, it’s even more. By any standards, just the rent is more than the full loan many survive on.

How do you know the op and grandparents won’t continue to subsidise? The grandparents and dd sorted the accommodation. She could have saved £££££ but didn’t. It’s obviously easy money and pushover grandparents. No doubt plenty more available on top of the £40,000 plus they are already throwing her way over 3 years. She would have easily been ok with £250 a week rent releasing loads more money for living and socialising. Instead she has an unused grandparents generosity and parents just stood back and let her do it. That’s not a sensible approach to money and DD. It’s very hands off.

£500 a month in London is low regarding living costs but it didn’t have to be like that. This DD has expensive tastes. An expensive hobby. Plus took the max she could from grandparents. Looks like her values are not that high to me.

Also @WomblingTree86 what I'm trying to get across is that while lots of well off students exist keeping up with them is expensive, if they form part of your main friend group. Of course, university is about new people and most people have friends from a variety of backgrounds - but still a 'main' group... Who will be their housemates for the following years for example.

I went to LSE less than a decade ago and remember all these people living a completely unrelatable lifestyle. Holidays every few weeks (yes students travel on cheap tickets, but there's still a limit!). Never cooked, always ordering takeaway and then telling me I'd regret spending too much time in the kitchen (erm guys sorry I'm poor, no money for daily takeaway).
Shopping trips to Bicester village... Lots of meals and drinks out. Michelin starred restaurants.

Thankfully I made a sensible group of friends to house share with...

@WarriorWalrus

why isn’t she working now over the summer to save some money to fund herself on some things?

Well actually there's quite a gulf between well off people like the OP, and the actual 'rich' students. These are the sort that buy their children cars and apartments, continue to give them a rent allowance soon after graduation, etc. Regularly consume expensive things be it eating out or material things

Those aren't the sort of values OP wants her daughter to have. She wants her to be able to budget, not keep up with the Joneses.

While living in London my DH and I spent £500 a month between us on all expenses after mortgage and bills bar major purchases or hoilday with a joint income of 80k. This was a only two years ago. We simply didn't need or want anymore then that. And while at uni I certainly didn't live like that.

I pay £525 a month for a three bedroom semi detached house. £350 a week is crazy money 😳

Can I just say how lucky your daughter is to have grandparents like that

So you didn’t do any more work for seminars and tutorials, @Issania87 ? How’s she meant to fit in all the tennis?

Why can't she work and fund herself

I didn't get any support other than the loans that were available, but my course only had 10 hours a week actual tuition so it was easy for me to get a part time retail job around that.

£500 a month spending money should be plenty. That's our monthly budget for our family of 4 in London.

I suggest she budgets her everyday spending to keep inside the £500 and you provide an allowance for the sports tuition. She should be able to tell you how much it will cost both for set up and ongoing costs.

I understand you don't want her to work termtime but we a long summer is about to begin. She should have money saved up from the summer to supplement her loan. That could be spent on more expensive clothes that can't wait to be Christmas presents or the like.

OP may not live in your world but I'm sure she lives in the real world, given she and her DH are teachers. With that accommodation cost I'm sure the DD will be mixing with people who are similarly well off so I doubt her peers will be looking upon her unfavourably. I think many students in London are from very well off families nowadays

You wouldn't know if she had taken one though would you? I know one or two students who have done without their parents knowing.

I’m completely gobsmacked by how completely you do not live in the real world. Your daughter will not have a clue about real life.

As parents DH and I are extremely lucky to have more than enough to do what you want to and more, but would we - absolutely not. We will pay their accommodation and a small monthly allowance, but that will be it. Your daughter will have no idea of hard life can be and tbh I think she will be not looked at favourably by her peers.

Good luck with whatever you decide.

@WomblingTree86 for tuition fees only.

We always paid accommodation including catered halls in first year. All three of our kids used their loans /summer or weekend jobs to pay for anything else. All three went to Russell groups, were very sociable and/or sporty and one of them did a maths degree which is pretty much 9 - 6 in terms of contact hours. I occasionally subbed their train fares and all three came on family camping holidays.

Didn't she get a loan?

When DD went away to university we paid all accommodation, reasonable living expenses, phone, running her car (which generally stayed at home anyway), etc., but didn't go mad with extra for 'fancy' clothes or extravagant socialising. She funded her social life with work.

We were lucky that we could have quite easily have paid for her to enjoy a student life many working professionals wouldn't be able to afford, but how would that help her when she finished and found that she couldn't afford to continue living the same way?

She's done well for herself and now has a good career but life isn't cheap and she still appreciates how easy she had it, financially.

They train early in the morning and late in the evening @TizerorFizz and the matches take place on a Wednesday afternoon mostly, the same as every other university team sport.

There are hundreds of semi-professional tennis players between those one sees at Wimbledon and those who enjoy club tennis as a hobby. They get paid by clubs to play, they get their kit and rackets from manufacturers, they get small amounts of sponsorship, and they get grants from the LTA through which they will also have access to training facilities, coaches, S&C, gym programmes and nutritionists. If you're good enough, of course. OP says her DD is at that sort of level, I don't see any reason to disbelieve her.

It's definitely not a route to fame and fortune as @sweepleall rightly says, but it's perfectly viable to make it pay for itself for a few years in your 20s.

@WarriorWalrus

part of being at uni is about roughing it and not having lots of money to spare.
it gives young people a drive and motivation to succeed if they don’t have everything handed to them on a plate. Going without home comforts etc, having to budget etc is character building and all part of growing up and being independent in your right.

My mistake.

Does she have time for a degree? All that tennis! You are obviously wealthy (I’m including grandparents in this) and as @Astsjakksmso says, your financial position is very different to the majority. If DD is that good, why is she not competing in the tournaments all over Europe? Many are at 18. Look at Wimbledon! Is she giving it up? Many don’t do uni and tennis? Where my DDs went to school, tennis scholarships were available. I’m amazed you didn’t go for one!