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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

When would you pay?

120 replies

Butterflyfluff · 08/07/2023 19:14

I’ve booked tickets for a concert for 8 people.

They are on my credit card so I said no rush to pay as it’s not due until the end of the month (in hindsight I shouldn’t have said this)

6 people paid straight away (as I would have done)

The last hasn’t and I know they won’t until the end of the month.

When would you pay (no one is short of money) - it’s more the hassle of having to check everyone has paid.

YANBU - just pay straight away so the person who booked doesn’t have to keep checking when everyone has paid

YABU - pay at the last minute

OP posts:
Emmamoo89 · 08/07/2023 20:36

I'd pay straight away

Curtains70 · 08/07/2023 20:36

If you said no rush I might wait until payday but I'd tell you I was doing that.

TeaKitten · 08/07/2023 20:35

Butterflyfluff · 08/07/2023 20:21

I guess I don’t really understand the concept of using other people’s credit to get something you want.

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Did she ask you to be the one to purchase her ticket? Why exactly did you say there was no rush when you don’t actually feel that way?

SamW98 · 08/07/2023 20:34

Butterflyfluff · 08/07/2023 20:21

I guess I don’t really understand the concept of using other people’s credit to get something you want.

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Tbh you offered them use of your credit by telling them no rush to pay til end of the month.

I’ve booked stuff on my credit card before and told friends I’ll let them know when I get my bill - if they pay before that all well and good but I wouldn’t expect to as I’ve told them I’ll let them know when to pay.

Original poster
Butterflyfluff · 08/07/2023 20:30

BeverleyMacker · 08/07/2023 20:26

I would message those who've not paid and just say you need the money asap due to an unexpected bill. Make sure you get money upfront next time.

I don’t need the money that desperately so I won’t be doing that.

It’s just an interesting life experiment.

OP posts:
BeverleyMacker · 08/07/2023 20:26

I would message those who've not paid and just say you need the money asap due to an unexpected bill. Make sure you get money upfront next time.

Original poster
Butterflyfluff · 08/07/2023 20:21

BigDrive · 08/07/2023 20:11

Not everyone gets paid at the same time of month though. I'm self employed so I'd pay once I could afford it which might be at a different time of the month each month.

I guess I don’t really understand the concept of using other people’s credit to get something you want.

OP posts:
TeaKitten · 08/07/2023 20:11

Are you certain they are waiting until the end of the month to be annoying and not because they are a bit short of money and are waiting for payday?

BigDrive · 08/07/2023 20:11

Not everyone gets paid at the same time of month though. I'm self employed so I'd pay once I could afford it which might be at a different time of the month each month.

Original poster
Butterflyfluff · 08/07/2023 20:09

lpedst · 08/07/2023 20:01

But they clearly are bothered, I don't understand why the OP is pretending this is anything but an opportunity to moan about this person that they think has acted in the wrong. They could have started a thread to ask the question about when you would pay someone without any of the details they have included.

If they weren't bothered they wouldn't have said in hindsight the shouldn't have offered and suggested this person has pushed to the limit, despite them only doing something the OP offered. The OP also clearly expects this person to feel uncomfortable / guilty as everyone else has said they have paid on a group chat and they haven't.

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It’s clear which camp you are in! 😂

OP posts:
Original poster
Butterflyfluff · 08/07/2023 20:08

KarmaStar · 08/07/2023 19:53

Ha ha!! Op,no matter how many times you repeat yourself they are not listening!
🌟The up is not chasing the money or angry s/he just is curious as to whether you pay up straight away or when you feel like it/remember/have the money in this scenario.!!!

Thank you! At least someone gets the point of this post! 😂

OP posts:
flutterby1 · 08/07/2023 20:07

Immediately. Can't stand owing people and like to know where I am financially.

Original poster
Butterflyfluff · 08/07/2023 20:06

lpedst · 08/07/2023 20:01

But they clearly are bothered, I don't understand why the OP is pretending this is anything but an opportunity to moan about this person that they think has acted in the wrong. They could have started a thread to ask the question about when you would pay someone without any of the details they have included.

If they weren't bothered they wouldn't have said in hindsight the shouldn't have offered and suggested this person has pushed to the limit, despite them only doing something the OP offered. The OP also clearly expects this person to feel uncomfortable / guilty as everyone else has said they have paid on a group chat and they haven't.

Show quote history

Have you read the title of the thread?

My only gripe is the hassle of having to still monitor who has and hasn’t paid.

If everyone just paid straight away I could forget about it - the concert is next year.

OP posts:
Original poster
Butterflyfluff · 08/07/2023 20:03

lpedst · 08/07/2023 19:43

I don't get why you offered something (that no one asked for) and now you're annoyed they've taken you up on the offer.

I’m not annoyed.

I’m just surprised that, knowing the other 6 have already paid, the last one is stringing it out.

I’d pay straight away - I realise we’re not all the same, but looking at the vote, most people would too.

OP posts:
lpedst · 08/07/2023 20:01

KarmaStar · 08/07/2023 19:53

Ha ha!! Op,no matter how many times you repeat yourself they are not listening!
🌟The up is not chasing the money or angry s/he just is curious as to whether you pay up straight away or when you feel like it/remember/have the money in this scenario.!!!

But they clearly are bothered, I don't understand why the OP is pretending this is anything but an opportunity to moan about this person that they think has acted in the wrong. They could have started a thread to ask the question about when you would pay someone without any of the details they have included.

If they weren't bothered they wouldn't have said in hindsight the shouldn't have offered and suggested this person has pushed to the limit, despite them only doing something the OP offered. The OP also clearly expects this person to feel uncomfortable / guilty as everyone else has said they have paid on a group chat and they haven't.

Proudofitbabe · 08/07/2023 19:58

Straightaway, because I wouldn't let someone be without money for 8 concert tickets. It's too much.

KarmaStar · 08/07/2023 19:53

Ha ha!! Op,no matter how many times you repeat yourself they are not listening!
🌟The up is not chasing the money or angry s/he just is curious as to whether you pay up straight away or when you feel like it/remember/have the money in this scenario.!!!

TheChosenTwo · 08/07/2023 19:52

I’m absolutely a last minute type person in almost all aspects of my life but NEVER when it comes to owing anyone a penny. I will always pay immediately because I would hate to forget (and I would), and I would hate to put someone in the position where they had to remind me. From my point of view too I just wouldn’t ever ask someone to repay me if they’d forgotten so I’d really hope they’d just remember and pay promptly 😂

heidihigh · 08/07/2023 19:49

I would pay straight away as I hate owing money. But, in fairness, you did say no rush...

SamW98 · 08/07/2023 19:49

I’d usually pay straight away otherwise i would forget.
However if, as in this case, I was told it was on credit card and to pay end of month, I’d probably wait until the person who booked the tickets said they’d got their bill through.

lpedst · 08/07/2023 19:43

I don't get why you offered something (that no one asked for) and now you're annoyed they've taken you up on the offer.

SlightlygrumpyBettyswaitress · 08/07/2023 19:41

Me and my friends have a mix. Normally one will put it on a card and state a date to pay by, usually a week before its due. I always pay straight away through fear of forgetting!

Chocolatelabradorsarethebest · 08/07/2023 19:37

Well you’ve said the end of the month so that’s probably the deadline the last person has in their mind. They might be waiting for payday and then pay you straight away. At the moment it’s sitting on your credit card and not costing you anything. If you’d paid from your current account that’s a different matter.

I’ve got this exact situation. I’ve just paid for a holiday with friends, it’s on my credit card, I’ve told them to pay me by the 5th of next month as I’ll need to pay it off. One friend has already paid, the other hasn’t. All fine as I know they’ll pay me and they’re just working in the parameters of what I’ve said, it hasn’t even crossed my mind to question it.

TeenDivided · 08/07/2023 19:33

My DD who does not pick up on social cues / hints would take what you said to mean pay at the end of the month.

Phos · 08/07/2023 19:32

Straight away usually because I forget otherwise.