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AIBU?

Share your dilemmas and get honest opinions from other Mumsnetters.

Original poster

Mumsnet Land

82 replies

meddysam · 08/07/2023 08:24

I've noticed that there are some things that MNetters have in common;

The dc are stunning & extremely tall.
Most dc are highly gifted & reading adult level books, producing talented art & solving complex math equations in nursery.
6 figure salaries are normal but people only borrow 1.5 x their salary for a mortgage (risk adverse).
Food is cooked from scratch avoiding UPFs & a slice of cake is a rare treat which would fill you up for the week.
As well as dc doing lots of sport, MNs and their partners can also fit in lots of exercise on a daily basis as well as socialising/hobbies & full time work plus commute. They are just more organised than other people.
It's common to have neighbour issues so that's why you don't open your door to strangers.

In real life I've never met someone who ticks all, any of these boxes! is there a secret commune somewhere or a certain part of the country where this utopia exists? can I move there?

OP posts:
InceyWinceySpidy · 08/07/2023 09:57

Havaina · 08/07/2023 08:30

I’m on AIBU MN a lot and I don’t see this. What threads are you on?

Same. Not sure where you're seeing this in such volume.

Original poster
meddysam · 08/07/2023 09:57

She has a dog and kids with burn marks, after she prioritized rescuing the dog from a burning building, only going back for the children once the dog was safe.

Dogs are King!

OP posts:
Original poster
meddysam · 08/07/2023 09:56

Surely this is the whole point of the post?

😆😆

OP posts:
Original poster
meddysam · 08/07/2023 09:55

@Hereinthismoment One of my favourite threads was one where the OP had mentioned something that happened after dinner. The thread obviously moved away from the actual issue & turned into a dinner vs supper debate. I think it was decided that the OP was utter scum because she had dinner. batshit!

OP posts:
Hereinthismoment · 08/07/2023 09:52

It’s massively different from the real world. Thank Christ!

ShortHairedGeneral · 08/07/2023 09:51

I'm a shit mum, was an even shitter wife, we often eat shit, my house is a mess, I have no savings, I've never managed to make a chicken stretch to 20 meals, I'm bloody sure I have NEVER had my ducks in a row once in my 52 years, and I eat cake every day. Sometimes more than once.

Should I get my coat?

Original poster
meddysam · 08/07/2023 09:51

@Fandabedodgy I did forget sheets & salads

OP posts:
Isitsixoclockalready · 08/07/2023 09:50

meddysam · 08/07/2023 08:24

I've noticed that there are some things that MNetters have in common;

The dc are stunning & extremely tall.
Most dc are highly gifted & reading adult level books, producing talented art & solving complex math equations in nursery.
6 figure salaries are normal but people only borrow 1.5 x their salary for a mortgage (risk adverse).
Food is cooked from scratch avoiding UPFs & a slice of cake is a rare treat which would fill you up for the week.
As well as dc doing lots of sport, MNs and their partners can also fit in lots of exercise on a daily basis as well as socialising/hobbies & full time work plus commute. They are just more organised than other people.
It's common to have neighbour issues so that's why you don't open your door to strangers.

In real life I've never met someone who ticks all, any of these boxes! is there a secret commune somewhere or a certain part of the country where this utopia exists? can I move there?

There are threads like that but Mumsnet is a diverse forum really - it's full of differing opinions - especially on AIBU where opinions are obviously quite 'spirited' at times. I don't think that it's massively different from people in the real world except that people can feel more empowered to be rude at times because of anonymity.

x2boys · 08/07/2023 09:50

Somethingintheattic · 08/07/2023 09:02

Children are all 'very bright', get 9's at GCSE, A* at Alevel and go onto a Russell Group University. Achieving 4/5 or grade 'C' is failing - all the GCSE and A level threads are like this. My son struggled with exams but is now happy and 'thriving' (young people thrive on MN) at University - but there was nowhere to go on MN when he was struggling or to celebrate he had passed.

Added to that every single 16 -18 yr old in mumsnet,land attends a school.sixth form doing A levels with a,view to going to university ,there seems to be no concept that
Not all schools have sixth forms and many students go to sixth firm college
Not all.students do A levels and there are lots of options at FE, colleges post 16
Not everybody wants to go to university

Hereinthismoment · 08/07/2023 09:45

A lot of the squabbling is because the OP has to be given a hard time.

So start a thread AIBU annoyed that DS was given a detention?

Your DS is a lying little shit who is single-handedly ruining the life chances of the other kids in the class. You should implement consequences immediately and buy flowers for the teacher.

Then if you’re a teacher, start a thread AIBU to have given this boy a detention?

You should resign in disgrace, the poor kid has special needs, educate yourself.

People like to dress it up as one form or other of ‘bashing’ but generally it’s because there’s a lot of pent up frustration and general moodiness on here and someone starting a thread is fair game!

Fandabedodgy · 08/07/2023 09:44

The dc are stunning & extremely tall

Mine are average height but of course they are the most beautiful in the world - as is every child.

Most dc are highly gifted & reading adult level books, producing talented art & solving complex math equations in nursery

Mine are doing well at school. Oldest is a bit lazy though.

6 figure salaries are normal but people only borrow 1.5 x their salary for a mortgage (risk adverse)

I am 6-figs but most of my life wasn't. I bought my first house on a 110% mortgage at 2.5 my salary - back in the day.

Food is cooked from scratch avoiding UPFs & a slice of cake is a rare treat which would fill you up for the week

It is cooked from scratch unless it's from the chippy, Chinese or Indian and I eat too much cake.

As well as dc doing lots of sport, MNs and their partners can also fit in lots of exercise on a daily basis as well as socialising/hobbies & full time work plus commute. They are just more organised than other people

We do tons of hobbies. WFH full time so no commute. Organised-ish.

It's common to have neighbour issues

We live next door to a deranged nationalist

so that's why you don't open your door to strangers

We always open our door.

You forgot

Washing your sheets & duvet every single day - I don't do that
Eating massive salads - normal fine for me

ChocHotolate · 08/07/2023 09:44

Plumbear2 · 08/07/2023 08:53

You are picking pieces from 100s of posters. While someone may mention their child is good at maths they don't mention the other things. I think you are combining lots of posters into one person

Surely this is the whole point of the post?

Original poster
meddysam · 08/07/2023 09:44

@FabFitFifties what is it you think I'm jealous of?

OP posts:
BadLad · 08/07/2023 09:42

Orchidgal · 08/07/2023 09:27

My mumsnet woman:

Anxious / highly strung.
Socially anxious and borderline agrophobic.
Nobody has any right to demand anything of her. She is wholly justified in never speaking to the neighbours, rarely answering the phone or the door and avoiding weddings or other social events especially if in-laws will be there.
She is also sad she doesn't have many friends.
If she has a dog she sets dogs on a pedestal and will defend them to the very death.
If she doesn’t have a dog she thinks they are vicious dirty dangerous creatures that should be banned from all public spaces and kept in the garage of homes she visits.

She has a dog and kids with burn marks, after she prioritized rescuing the dog from a burning building, only going back for the children once the dog was safe.

FabFitFifties · 08/07/2023 09:41

No I think mine has gone over your head!

Original poster
meddysam · 08/07/2023 09:39

This - you are just hypersensitive to the ones you are jealous of? Not having a dig

I think my post has gone completely over your head!

OP posts:
FabFitFifties · 08/07/2023 09:37

anythinginapinch · 08/07/2023 08:36

My MN woman is way different to your description. A single or unmarried mother to children with SEN, crap partner or ex partner/DH: or a woman who cannot stand her MIL; or who cannot use her words but has to ask for help in telling her neighbours children to stop piddling in her garden; hates people who are better off; and posts "daily mail" quotes while apologising go doing so.

Also finds it part of nature to have nails done weekly, wash everything constantly, and cannot use Google

This - you are just hypersensitive to the ones you are jealous of? Not having a dig - that would be natural. As would disbelief that some peoples lives can be so different to yours. I work in a community of 2 halves and see it all. My best friend lives in a 9 bedroomed house, has privately educated children who have done it all, and is very much what you describe. I am not🤣

GreenWheat · 08/07/2023 09:36

MN isn't one homogeneous mass of similar people. I think it's easy to pick up on recurring themes that don't feature much in your own life on a big forum like this. To me, every other person on here seems to have some form of anxiety /SEN, which is far removed from my own experience and social circle. I also think some people are prone to exaggeration because it's all anonymous so nobody can verify their claims.

Original poster
meddysam · 08/07/2023 09:35

I think this was going to be an idea for a theme park

That would be brilliant! 😆

OP posts:
schnauzerbeard · 08/07/2023 09:35

RobertsRadio · 08/07/2023 08:49

Yep Op, you have pretty much described me and my family, although we did borrow 2.5% of our salaries to buy our dream home, but it was a good investment as it's now worth several million £.

Most of my friends fit your description, it's normal isn't it?

The math isn't matching for this one. 250% maybe?

Original poster
meddysam · 08/07/2023 09:34

@BadLad shit, you're right how did I forget that

OP posts:
Original poster
meddysam · 08/07/2023 09:33

Brittle chippiness disguised as humour. Unaware of the distinction between 'adverse' and 'averse'. Likely to respond to perceived slights with disproportionate anger.

lol, bet you're fun at parties!

OP posts:
Moveoverdarlin · 08/07/2023 09:32

When I joined MN only in the last year, that’s what I thought it would be like, all private schools, pony club and Boden. But I don’t think it’s AT ALL like that.

No threads I read talk about tall, stunning children with big fancy houses. From what I have seen everyone has children who are neurodivergent or ADHD or SEN, everyone has blended families and issues with their partners ex, no one drives, everyone is a carer for someone or other, everyone has parking issues and everyone hates their SIL who they happily call a cheeky fucker. That pretty much sums it up. I only came on here to get a review of Disneyland and I’ve been hooked ever since.

Original poster
meddysam · 08/07/2023 09:32

Well this thread started low and descended even further. Delightful

I thought it was lighthearted!

OP posts:
StellaF · 08/07/2023 09:30

I’d never heard of anyone irl with either misophonia or emetophobia. A very disproportionately high percentage of mnetters appear to be suffering with these disorders.