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AIBU?

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Original poster

Guy with teeth

141 replies

sadconfusedembarassed · 26/05/2023 11:13

I met a man at a session for one of my hobbies (outing as it's quite niche so can't mention). He's a really funny and smart guy and I really enjoy chatting with him etc. He's also really good looking/healthy/fit and a few years older than me but I have an embarrassing question that is making me feel quite shallow as well. I don't think I am necessarily shallow and never thought this type of stuff would bother me but I really have an issue with his teeth. I think he might be a smoker and I haven't asked and he definitely has 'bad' teeth and I don't really want to describe it. The problem is that I really like him and his personality and I think he might have a little crush on me (he's quite popular there). So what should I do? How can I tell him to go see a dentist or something along that line, is that even acceptable?? AIBU to even like him?? Please help me, I need some advice from the wise MN. I am definitely name changing after this post!

OP posts:
PToosher · 26/05/2023 13:02

If a woman I 'liked' told me to sort my teeth out, I'd feel hurt and embarrassed and even if I did get my teeth sorted out I wouldn't date her.
I'd probably consider the 30 lbs she could do with losing, which wouldn't have been an issue for me initially, or the state of her feet in those sandals.

skgnome · 26/05/2023 13:02

You either like him or not, simple
you like him and he has a crush on you? Great! Go ahead and date
his teeth are a major put down, fine, you’re not obliged to get romantically involved with every person you click - just don’t
you don’t say “I sort of like you but get your teeth fixed so we can date” or if you do be prepared to be told “aw, you’re lovely but your body is not perfect, get surgery and then we can consider dating”

Vroomfondleswaistcoat · 26/05/2023 13:01

The trouble with teeth is that they aren't something that can easily be changed. Someone wears ridiculously short trousers? Easily overcome. Has a daft haircut? Can be worked around or they can wear a hat. Has awful teeth? Not a cheap or easy fix and, if they're like my teeth, you can spend a fortune on getting them 'put right' only for one ill-advised apple to ruin thousands of pounds worth of work.

RichardsGear · 26/05/2023 13:01

Cam22 · 26/05/2023 12:58

There’s always one!

Show quote history

Well, you can't say he's tall, dark and handsome with nice fangs and not expect someone to bite, so to speak! 😜

RichardsGear · 26/05/2023 13:00

I do think OP if you were really keen the teeth probably wouldn't put you off. However that could change. My husband has had teeth from smoking and it really bothers me now. He could afford to pay for whitening but hasn't bothered and it is off putting.

Cam22 · 26/05/2023 12:58

dooneyousmugelf · 26/05/2023 12:57

The OP's standards aren't the issue. The arrogance that the bloke might stand a chance with her if he just popped off and had his teeth 'fixed', coupled with the fact she thought however fleetingly that this would be an appropriate suggestion, is extremely unattractive.

👍🏻

Cam22 · 26/05/2023 12:58

RichardsGear · 26/05/2023 12:56

Does the sleeping in a coffin not put you off though?

There’s always one!

dooneyousmugelf · 26/05/2023 12:57

The OP's standards aren't the issue. The arrogance that the bloke might stand a chance with her if he just popped off and had his teeth 'fixed', coupled with the fact she thought however fleetingly that this would be an appropriate suggestion, is extremely unattractive.

RichardsGear · 26/05/2023 12:57

@Cam22

Original poster
sadconfusedembarassed · 26/05/2023 12:57

readbooksdrinktea · 26/05/2023 12:55

We all have preferences. That's fine. What's surprising to me as that you needed to ask if it's OK to ask a virtual stranger to get their teeth fixed.

Yeah lesson learned

OP posts:
RichardsGear · 26/05/2023 12:56

Does the sleeping in a coffin not put you off though?

Cam22 · 26/05/2023 12:56

readbooksdrinktea · 26/05/2023 12:55

We all have preferences. That's fine. What's surprising to me as that you needed to ask if it's OK to ask a virtual stranger to get their teeth fixed.

This.^

Original poster
sadconfusedembarassed · 26/05/2023 12:56

Cam22 · 26/05/2023 12:53

The teeth are a tad prominent. Literally - and clearly metaphorically in your mind.

🙂

Show quote history

Ahahahah right ;)

OP posts:
readbooksdrinktea · 26/05/2023 12:55

We all have preferences. That's fine. What's surprising to me as that you needed to ask if it's OK to ask a virtual stranger to get their teeth fixed.

LadyKenya · 26/05/2023 12:54

Cam22 · 26/05/2023 12:49

…date

Show quote history

So you have your standards, but it is a problem for the OP to have hers? Ok thenHmm

Cam22 · 26/05/2023 12:53

sadconfusedembarassed · 26/05/2023 12:49

Do you find that picture ugly? Thought you didn't care about teeth 😅

The teeth are a tad prominent. Literally - and clearly metaphorically in your mind.

🙂

Pringles87 · 26/05/2023 12:52

Wow - as someone with crooked teeth considering going back into the dating world - this post has made me want to stay inside my house and not even try again 🫠 some people can’t help how their teeth look - my parents never got me a brace when I was younger and I have a whole jaw misalignment and then I’ve had terrible health the last 2 years which basically ruined the enamel on them and really deteriorated the condition of them. I have only now got into a position where I can afford to get them fixed by some chance inheritance that I was left, but not everyone can afford that with the prices nowadays. He will find someone who accepts him for who he is and how he looks - it’s just not going to be you OP!

Cam22 · 26/05/2023 12:51

I’m sharing. 🙄

Original poster
sadconfusedembarassed · 26/05/2023 12:51

Cam22 · 26/05/2023 12:49

…date

Show quote history

Okay good for you, no one asked?

OP posts:
Original poster
sadconfusedembarassed · 26/05/2023 12:49

Do you find that picture ugly? Thought you didn't care about teeth 😅

OP posts:
Cam22 · 26/05/2023 12:49

Cam22 · 26/05/2023 12:48

I don’t dare because I’m already married. My husband is tall, dark, handsome, clever, decent - oh and he has nice fangs.

…date

Cam22 · 26/05/2023 12:48

I don’t dare because I’m already married. My husband is tall, dark, handsome, clever, decent - oh and he has nice fangs.

Christmascracker0 · 26/05/2023 12:48

Everyone has their preferences in dating, so fair enough if you don’t like bad teeth but you can’t tell him that!

Also as I’ve got older I’ve found I need to compromise on some of my preferences as the dating pool gets smaller and smaller so I can’t be too choosy 🤣

Gettingbysomehow · 26/05/2023 12:46

So you'd all be happy dating a man with horrendous teeth and stinking breath then? I think you are liars.

Cam22 · 26/05/2023 12:44

Cam22 · 26/05/2023 12:41

Triggering? Unlikely. People are just bemused by your attitude and treating you accordingly.

Care to post a photograph of yourself…?
Thought not.

This?

Guy with teeth