I escaped an abusive relationship last year, coercive control, emotional, verbal, financial and (rarely) physical abuse (I know even one instance of physical abuse is one too many but I wanted to be clear that the physical was rare to give a fuller picture)
Since I left there have been MANY instances of continued abuse, threats and control and there is currently zero contact between dad and the children at his request (although in the last week he has said he didn't mean it and wants contact) in the past 10 months he has inconsistently paid a set sum each month but is now trying to change the terms again (in my opinion to assert control/attempt contact with me)
Instead of transferring the money into my account he is trying to give me a code which I take to the cashpoint and withdraw the money directly from his account
I don't want to do this tbh. I don't " need " the money as I budget with the expectation he will not contribute due to previous issues with him making and breaking promises in regards to maintenance money for the children, that said the money is for the children and could go towards their expenses.
YABU - it's money for the children go to the cashpoint
YANBU - he can transfer the money he's just trying to assert control
I'm seeing my solicitor again next week but wanted opinions in the meantime
Also for information;
the code has to be used in a set time frame which he will set
There is no point going through CMS as the calculator shows he will have to pay a lot less or nothing at all
Happy to answer questions to clarify anything and thanks for making it to the end!