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AIBU?

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Original poster

To keep her this weekend?

33 replies

moominmummie · 11/05/2023 20:19

DD has gone to her dad 3 weekends in a row, it's a 1.5 hour round trip for me as he doesn't drive. He told me last week he was going to be away working this weekend and for the next few weekends.

I planned to go swimming, McDonald's etc with DD. Tonight he reveals he hasn't gone away to work and started making plans with her about tomorrow night over FaceTime. I said I thought she was with me this weekend, he said he's not going until Monday, but he said the exact same thing last weekend and that it was important she stayed as he wouldn't see her.

She even said to him she wants to spend the weekend with me, completely off her own accord. He thinks I've swayed her decision (obviously) and is pissed off with me. He's livid I'm taking her swimming & says I get to see her all the time.

It's not like I'm stopping him from seeing her, I always drop her off and pick her up on a Sunday. Am I being unreasonable to stick to my guns and have her with me this weekend?

OP posts:
Treesoutsidemywindow · 11/05/2023 20:57

He's taking the piss OP! As another poster said, he needs to agree a schedule with you, and then stick to it. When you think about, the ball is really in your court, as if he can't drive, and wants to change the schedule, he's reliant on you to transport your DD. Just say NO!

Original poster
moominmummie · 11/05/2023 20:52

I just feel like the villain!
I said I shouldn't have to change my plans last minute when he's only told me the day before the weekend. His response was 'no we wouldn't want that now would we'.
Looked at me with such distaste that I dare take our daughter swimming without inviting him along...

OP posts:
tikkanaan · 11/05/2023 20:42

tikkanaan · 11/05/2023 20:41

Oh FFS . No you're not being unreasonable. He needs to agree to a contract schedule and stick to it

My exasperation was aimed at him not you x

tikkanaan · 11/05/2023 20:41

Oh FFS . No you're not being unreasonable. He needs to agree to a contract schedule and stick to it

Sheepsheepeverywhere · 11/05/2023 20:37

Hang on op. He really is calling all the shots. Having a frazzled dmisn't great for your dd as much as seeing a df is important imo.
He needs to start collecting at the least. Public transport!
And keeping to a regular schedule keeps things fair and organised for all 3 of you. Or he is cherry picking meanwhile you do the donkey work.

Wavescrashingonthebeach · 11/05/2023 20:30

Tell him to sort the transport out going forward he's taking the piss.

Original poster
moominmummie · 11/05/2023 20:29

@wishingitwasfriday he doesn't, it's only been the last month. Before then it was a lot less regularly due to his work

OP posts:
wishingitwasfriday · 11/05/2023 20:27

Why does he have her every weekend?

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