Hospital appointment

My DH are generally well and fit, mentally and physically but we each separately verbally told the GP (Ed: too many adverbs!) that we were happy for him to share medical information with the other. It means that if he rings with the result of a test and the tested spouse is not available he can tell the other the result. It works for us (and we make appointments for each other. Actually it’s usually him making one for me because I was brought up not to bother the GP unless I was dying when it would be too late, so stillI dont bother him). I imagine there’s a note on each of our files somewhere. It helps, I suppose, that it’s a small country practice and he knows us both well, so he knows one of us isn’t forcing the other to reveal medical information to the other.

We had this recently, DD is on medication that needed a review so they text my phone and asked us to call

I called and said my DD needs a medication review. She had turned 16 5 days before.
The desk dragon got all snotty and said "I'm not authorised to speak to you, and I will be making a note of this unauthorised call".

I told her the text was sent to my phone and that DD was at school.

When DD rang with me there, the same dragon offered phone call appointments during school hours and got very cross when DD said they couldn't do these until after 4pm.

Then the dragon demanded to do them on what was the first day of her exams and said DD was being difficult.

At that point, DD, having never had to call anything official before, put it on speakerphone, and said "look, speak to my mum, this is ridiculous, I'm not being awkward or difficult, I just can't make those times."

So she says "why can't you just be excused if your phone rings in school as it's medical "

DD said "because during the time you've said they may phone, I will be in the middle of my GCSE Media exam and I'm pretty sure it's against the rules to leave the exam to take a phone call, especially when phones and smart watches are banned from the exam hall, and sorry, I'm not willing to fail all my exams over a call about medication."

The woman hung up and later DD was sent an appointment time for half term instead.

That's what I did last time, had to put DH on the phone!

Ridiculous.

Sorry - wrong thread please ignore my comment.

You need to widen your circle ... my friends weren't all the same age as me .. so they were at different stages in their lives, some were retired, some were working part time, some didn't need to work. And don't assume all "older" people are too feeble to look after your DC. I had a wonderful network of friends in my village ... some of whom just liked taking my baby out in the buggy to give me a break.

It's a shitshow!
I've got a none verbal son 18 and even though I told the hospital receptionist he's none verbal she said he has to make an appointment himself 🤣. He's been at the same hospital for appointments since age 3 🤷‍♀️

My DH was attempting to sort out neighbours internet and computer services, the neighbour is 88.

He tried to do it the ‘proper’ way and communicate with various services through the neighbour, this was not successful!

He then pretended he was the neighbour, on various calls and all was fine.

I think you will have to lie in order to book appointments ( tricky impersonations will need a bit of practice!)

MissyB1 · Today 10:23
our GP surgery have been insisting on this since our ds turned 12!! Yep they expect 12 year olds to navigate the fucking joke of a booking system and to make autonomous decisions about their healthcare! We have had to resort to using private GPs “

Seriously?! Would definitely have challenged that with the local authority.

I agree but they should have something in place for different circumstances. OP’s issue is that her child is at school. So the suggestion I made as aimed at that so that they can have a discussion about being able to help on their child’s behalf.

our GP surgery have been insisting on this since our ds turned 12!! Yep they expect 12 year olds to navigate the fucking joke of a booking system and to make autonomous decisions about their healthcare! We have had to resort to using private GPs 😡

That's worrying. DD has SN and would have no clue how to deal with medical issues herself. I am already waiting for a DWP meeting to become her appointee. We have numerous hospital appointments so I'll need to speak to her pediatrician.

Honestly, Id just lie, i've done it for my mum before. Just get DH to say hes DS. They arent gonna call him a liar. Or you do it and put on a bit of a lower voice.

Really? I had no idea this was the case, haven’t had to deal with hospital in respect of our kids. Our GP surgery happily dealt with us until they were 18.

Presumably he wasn't told that till he got through?

Why has he been on the phone for an hour? He's already been told he can't rebook the appointment?

I don't quite understand, I had to reschedule a consultant derm appointment, I called the dept noted on my letter and the woman who answer rescheduled me. I had to wait another 6 weeks but them's the breaks.

Some kids don’t want their parents knowing medical info and want that privacy,

Yes I think the medical autonomy at 16 thing was to make access to contraception and abortion and STD treatment easier (which I fully support).

Appointeeship only authorises you to deal with DWP benefits. For wider authority, you need guardianship, but it's quite a complex/ expensive process, sadly

Totally agree. It would remove the constant need to reiterate and make medical care easier for everyone involved. Patient centred to the benefit of the patient and sometimes that means the need to advocate on behalf of someone. I don’t know why it’s made so complex.

Yup and that is what is missing - that form that says my disabled 16 year old cannot do this. Not sure why EHCPs don't include this.

No good if the child is non-verbal or has selective mutism or SALT needs or hearing needs. We shouldn't have to go through a pantomime of pretending that our children with disabilities can manage because one day they were 15 and now they are 16 and it's all change.
My son needs support because of his disabilities not his age. He will always need support.

Medical issues are always a bit tricky and can be a bit of a minefield. Some kids don’t want their parents knowing medical info and want that privacy, others need someone to advocate. Unless a child signs a form giving permission for clinicians to discuss with parents then absolutely they should be the only ones able to determine medical care at 16 - as long as they have capacity to do so.

In cases like this I would have the loud speaker on, both sat together so that he can answer questions and someone is there to help and then see if there’s a way to alter things so that you can book etc on behalf of the child.

@Boxbedbank Thanks for info. I'll do that.

Strange I had to reschedule an appointment for dd by phone as she is abroad and had no issue doing so. Can he not pretend/imply he is your ds?