Bills with the man's name first.

when people are saying it doesn't matter: those are good examples. So instead of just taking the name of the person who made the booking, someone had to actively set up the system so it defaults to the male passenger, or to search in the system if there is a male travellig as well, and change everything to their name. Why go through all the extra effort, if it does not matter?

I’d believe it. I booked flights with KLM this summer for myself, DS aged 12 and a younger child. Everything came addressed to DS and he was listed as the lead passenger. I complained and the response was that it couldn’t be changed, thank you for understanding. I replied saying no I didn’t understand, was it because DS had a penis?

Apparently it wasn’t that and it was just for no apparent reason and anyway I was
mistaken. Yeah right.

People who think it affects absolutely nothing, well if I buy a fucking airline ticket and also buy one for a male why can’t the email and ticket be addressed to me? I bought it myself with my own credit card for which I alone will be paying the bill! I’m a person in my own right FFS, DS is not my keeper.

I've complained about this before as part of a bigger discussion. While settling in to a new rental my partner messaged that he was at work but one of the utilities was trying to contact him so I call them straight away. Issue was handled but at the end I asked that it was noted that I was the primary contact - I had set everything up and been the only one they'd spoken to throughout. I also mentioned while I was mid-flow that it was also a bit irritating that despite this my partner has been named before me in a letter addressed to us (same situation, both my fore and surname are before his alphabetically). It was massively petty but I did feel like it was a tiny life admin victory when the follow-up letter was addressed to me first.

it literally effects nothing in anyone's life.
Well exept of course posters on this thread who lost money like Fannygotobed or had issues dealing with service providers like NatWestPig..

This wouldn't even register with me, I couldn't care any less than I do about who's name goes where on a letter. It has no bearing on anything at all, it literally effects nothing in anyone's life.

Just found the invoice from a hotel we stayed in during summer holidays. I booked the hotel. I paid the hotel. I didn't even give them the names of other guests, but they did ask for passports when checking in.
Name on invoice? DH's. If he wasn't there, guess they would have put 7yo DS' name there..

I have a first name that is very obviously a woman's name but one company writes to us both as Mr John Smith and Mr Helen Smith. I have no idea why they don't have the common sense to just put Mr and Mrs Smith (or Mrs and Mr :) ).

Actually another thing that irritates the hell out of me is I am a company director along with a male friend. Both my first name and last name come before his and I'm listed first on Company House.

Every piece of mail offering us credit, loans, new phones, business advice etc is always and without fail addressed to him. In the 7 years we've been operating I have NEVER had any of the unsolicited offers addressed to me. Not that I want them but the blatant sexism is appalling.

DH and I are both Drs and somehow he is still usually listed first (even if I am the one who set up the account)

I am miss. Or ms. Depends on mood. Sometimes mrs.
On ct bill i am miss. Still not first

This is the same on my nursery invoices, even though we are not together and I pay the bill and filled out the form with only me on it. Somehow Dad’s name has superseded mine 😡

It's been mentioned already but it's not sexist it's because Mr comes alphabetically before Mrs
And why some people with a title Miss comes first
It's the title

I set up a joint online account with my DB to deal with our late Parents’ estate. I dealt with the whole application and spoke to them on the phone. DB and I have different surnames and addresses. DB’s name appeared first on the account details/statements - at the time I let it slide as I was grieving-still grinds my gears to this day.

I understand that it is because of security but I registered the account when we moved to the new house. I set up the account with MY email and the bills came from MY bank account and only I had only spoken to them during this time. The provider decided to put DH first despite this and then refused to help in an emergency.

Natwestpig - That's because of security though that companies can only deal with the account holder, which is why it's best to have bills in both names. You can be a main account holder but you can ask for your husband or wife to be named as a second person.

Somebody's name has to be first, so I can't get worked up about this.

I've also had the experience of booking a holiday, listing myself as lead passenger, paying with my credit card and then getting the email confirmation to Dear Mr Husband (who had been made lead passenger) to MY bloody email address.

Yup, same. And hotel manager left a lovely gift basket and a card, that thank you for returning, Mr John Jones, our valued gold (or whatever) level loyalty scheme member. Except that he is not, I am.

It’s not a non-thing. It’s everyday sexism.

*I don’t see it as a petty problem. I see it as part

of the enshrined sexism of our society, and it needs dismantling piece by piece.*

This is it, precisely.

When i owned a flat, my sole name was in the title. When my partner moved in and we got married I added him to the title but the Land Registry put his name first.

When we bought out last house I did all the dealings with the conveyancer. They also knew all of the deposit came from accounts in my sole name. After completion there was an excess in the client account and they sent a cheque made out only to my husband. I put in a complaint which was not even acknowledged.

I've also had the experience of booking a holiday, listing myself as lead passenger, paying with my credit card and then getting the email confirmation to Dear Mr Husband (who had been made lead passenger) to MY bloody email address.

People say oh it's not important, it's just tradition to put the man first, to assume the wife and children take his surname. But it's SEXIST and it should be challenged.

What I'm saying is, you say yourself you have lots going on so this should not be on the top of your worry list 😊

Di you read the thread to see what issues innacuracies and switched names can cause?

You are genuinely over reacting though. I highly doubt somebody at the council purposely put your name 2nd because you 'don't have a penis'.

My husband does all of our admin. Yet my name comes first on half. He's nor bothered and neither am I.

What I'm saying is, you say yourself you have lots going on so this should not be on the top of your worry list 😊

It's a lot of fun to search by username and see what are the exclusively super important topics the 'don't you have better things to worry about' posters have been posting about.

If that's all you have to worry about...

My husband and I both have professional prefix ‘Dr’. My DS primary school (small village school, all female staff) used to write to us as Dr and Mrs X. They know I’m also Dr (I do all their teacher flu vaccines, come in to talk about my job for science week etc etc) but chose to refer to DH as Dr and me as Mrs.

It pissed me right off. Either refer to us as Mr and Mrs X or Dr and Dr X. I really don’t mind which… but the subconscious application of professional title Dr for man and of Mrs for woman is annoying. I jokingly pointed this out, made a jest about teaching girls their place in society etc. To be fair they looked sheepish and haven’t done it since.

You see this same gender/ title inconsistency in news (media interviews with professors etc) all the time.

Grrr.