To feel disgusting without makeup?

Oops yeah sorry if I was projecting there…I guess that’s just how it was for me and what helped me to feel better.

Do you know what op, you don't have to not wear it. Do what makes you happy and feels good.

Hi , I know this is an old post but thought I’d add a message as I went through exactly the same thing as you (still not completely over it). I couldn’t leave the house without makeup on and hated the way I looked without makeup. I tried to hide my ‘true face’ from all my partners as much as possible and would avoid any situation where someone might see me without makeup on. It was awful and controlled my life to such an extent I ended up having therapy to try to get over it. Have you looked up Body Dismorphic Disorder? Not trying to label, but it might be useful to look into as many of our shared behaviours seem to be symptomatic of this disorder.

I have overcome this to some extent with therapy and having children. I had twins and the pure survival mode of the early days, and necessity of putting their needs first, meant I simply couldn’t carry on living like that. It was hard at first but got easier with time. I still feel ugly without makeup and don’t like looking at myself in the mirror, but I continue to go out without it anyway. I’ve got to a point where I don’t care what strangers think (as I’ll probably never see them again), or friends/family etc (as they love me for who I am). I still struggle with some people I feel vulnerable around - the makeup acts as a kind of protective mask for me, but it’s the last and final step that I have to overcome.

About the birth thing - trust me, you won’t think about it in the moment as the process takes over you and is incredibly primal. I was stark naked for most of it and didn’t even think twice about it (with all of my issues lol)! Something stuck after that and although I still struggle with my looks, I’m more comfortable in and have a greater respect for my body in general and what it’s been through (birth, breastfeeding etc). I think it has helped me to value myself beyond my looks - as a woman, a mother and my unique self (sorry if that sounds cheesy).

I don’t know if that helped in any way but thought I’d respond as your experience sounds so similar to mine. There is a way out, but you have to learn to love yourself for who you are beyond your looks and be brave in putting yourself in situations that will make you feel deeply uncomfortable at first. Baby steps, but it does get easier with practice and when you realise most people don’t place as much importance on your looks as you do.

Also look on YouTube for 10 mins makeup routines using tinted moisturisers - I personally love nars brand- apply using damp beauty blender. I think if you tone down the make up gradually you’ll get used ti a more natural look

I would have eyelash extensions and brow micro blading as well as a facial every few weeks trust me it makes a huge difference to how you look. I used to always wear makeup until I had my second child that needed hospital treatment 4x week. I started getting lashes and brows and it was a game changer for me x

Go to primark, they do a great dupe of the expensive tanning drops for £3

You're so right. I am intrigued by multi coloured gunge though! Do you think they sell it in Boots?

I was like this, except I had worn make-up since I was 14, and for a large majority of that time had been full-on goth.

I hated the way I looked without make-up, it just
didn't look like 'me', and I thought I looked like a sick hamster.

Then I got older, and also I suppose healed a lot of the self-hatred I had going on.

Like @PinkArt I began to test things out - not wearing make-up at home first. Then when I was used to that, going out for a walk without it. Then to the local shops. I now can go to a bar or pizza place without make-up even - and no-one cares!

So I suppose I gradually built up the amount of time I saw myself without make-up - and now I feel like this is my face. I look ok.

I now find that when I do put make-up on, I feel a bit like I'm in drag - it looks way to much. Yet in photos it's really very minimal

It truly is just about what you get used to seeing - but you have to make the dive into seeing yourself without make-up a lot before it becomes the norm. I'm not certain slowly cutting down the amount of make-up you wear would do the trick.

I don't think the OP is "enjoying doing" this.

She has actually posted that she is worried about a fire because she would need to spend 45 minutes staring at herself in a mirror and dabbing (for those who didn't like smearing) colourful splodges here and there on herself before she could leave the burning building just in case someone looked at her.

I don't think it's a tired old narrative to mock that level of daftness.

@MissTrip82 - Could not agree more!

I think you should try going cold turkey OP! Spend that 45 minutes babying your skin and hair and you will look completely fresh and gorgeous.

I stopped during the pandemic and now I wear so much less and not every day. I actually feel gross if I put on foundation/concealer now because I just want to be nice to my skin!

This is not about how you look, but about how you feel. See if you can get help with that, via counselling.

I haven’t read whole thread but think others have said - this is absolutely deeper than just wearing make up and all about self esteem. Have you had psychotherapy before or would you consider it?

Try and think out your thoughts. If you look ugly...so what? Why is that bad? Plenty of ugly looking people are happy. have kids. Are respected. Occupy top jobs. So what happens if you are ugly? Get to the root of it and challenge it.

Like many things the only way out is through. You need to stop wearing it and see if your biggest fears happen.

I weaned myself off makeup by having days at home without it on and standing in front of the mirror and looking very carefully at my face. I pulled different facial expressions to and looked at different angles. I also told myself out loud "I am beautiful".
I noticed I felt a lot of anxiety to begin with. It got easier. Now I am fine.

Makes me wonder just how bad some people's makeup skills are. Smearing gunge? Is that what you're doing? No wonder you don't like the results.

Yeah there’s some really misogynistic vitriol in the language used by some - smeared on grunge, caked on, nonsense warnings about ‘clogged up’ damaged skin, assertions that you wont care about anything so silly once you’ve fulfilled your proper womanly purpose of motherhood etc. All comes from the tired old narrative that if women enjoy or are interested in something it must be superficial and worthy of mockery. It’s not just the OP who needs to think about her attitude to about makeup…….

I'm the same OP , there are occasions I don't have makeup on if I have a lot to do in the house and I know I won't be going anywhere but I feel horrible and the same as I would if I hadn't washed . I have had 3 children and still managed to keep it up but it does annoy me now more than ever, I don't have the same enjoyment in doing my makeup that I used to, it's a chore and I just do it because it's as much part of getting ready as showering and brushing my teeth are.
I have worn makeup most days since I was about 13 and I have always had comments about looking ill or 'different', I have pale skin , freckles , long but fair eyelashes and green eyes , but this against my dark hair I feel makes me look washed out and featureless .

I have recently thought about getting some semi permanent beauty treatments - lash tint/lift , eyebrows dyed , face tan to gradually help wean myself off the makeup.

I used to feel this way and honestly lockdown did me a favour. I got so used to not wearing it that I overcome that fear. Often go make up free now. Well maybe still a bit of eyebrow pencil, I'm not a monster 🤣

I used to be exactly like this op. I'm only 27 so my skin is "ok" but quite fair so I can look dead without anything to give it colour😂

When I had my ds I gradually started wearing less because I just didn't have the time, I started cutting out the bronzer and eyeliner and now all I wear is a tinted moisturiser mascara and brow gel.

It helps if you develop a good skin care routine so you have a good base and maybe start tinting your brows and lashes at home so you feel more put together if you don't have the time to do eyebrows and mascara?

I have never worn a lot of make up. When I was working I would wear a little but now I’m retired I never wear any. I don’t think I’m that pretty,I’m just used to seeing my face without it.

OP, I’m exactly the same , and I’m now in my early 60s. I have no intention of changing, and don’t see going ‘ bare faced ‘ as something virtuous. I feel horrible without my makeup and can’t concentrate on anything. I also hate my DP seeing my bare face. I don’t have any wrinkles or major issues with my skin, it’s just how I am.

@Tiredofbeingcold

Strictly Professional Eyelash & Eyebrow Dye Tint Basic Tinting Kit Tint Lash (Eyelash Tint Brown-15g SPE7510) - Tint only, no developer amzn.eu/d/bBFF9Fi

This is the one I've been buying recently which is less than £5 that's only the tint though. I started out buying a whole kit years ago, I think the one I had was by eyelure which at the time included a mascara wand, a small glass pot to mix in, the eyebrow tint and the developer/ activator. Now I buy this tint as that runs out fastest (still only about once a year). You can buy a developer liquid separately too it comes up as suggested when you look at this. Just wipe it off if you get it on your face so it doesn't stain and don't get it in your eyes.

The tanning drops I've bought are Tan-Luxe The Face illuminating self tan drops which are currently £14.90 on Amazon. I've only started this recently and it's cheered up my winter face no end and no orange! I put a drop or two in moisturiser and moisturise my whole face and neck.

Tan Luxe THE FACE Self Tan Drops, Medium (10 ml) Add Tanning Drops to Skin Care for Custom Face Tan, Cruelty Free & Vegan amzn.eu/d/e0sAH10

I haven't worn make-up for most of my life, and I'm 63. The last time was probably on my wedding day over 30 years ago, and it was the most minimal amount possible. I've never been pretty, and find it sad that one poster envies people who are "pretty enough to go out bare faced". It's not a question of being pretty, more of being confident about yourself.

Incidentally, I had freckles as a child but they disappeared - I often wish I still had them!

Anyway, I wish you luck and think you are on the right track regarding any future daughters.